Meals and Movies Blog

Of Kings and Pharaohs!

2010-07-02T11:43:00.002-04:00

Most horror film fans will site Don Coscarelli's Phantasm (1979), a mind-bending terror classic, as being his masterpiece... and honestly I would probably agree. However, it was his follow-up that had the most impact on me as a young child. The Beastmaster (1982) may have been a cheapie knock-off of Arnie's Conan the Barbarian (1982), but it was the perfect alchemy of outlandish mythos, action and camp. I spent the majority of my time between ages six and seven running around in my underpants, pretending to be the character Dar and commanding the beasts of the realm to do my bidding. Yeah, it's sad. Flashforward twenty years. In 2002's Bubba Ho-Tep, Coscarelli managed to strike that perfect balance once again.

The story picks up 25 years after the "death of Elvis Presley," however we are introduced to The King spending his twilight years in an old folks' home. It turns out that in his quest for a simpler life, Elvis pulled a Hayley Mills and switched lives with a succesful impersonator. And, yup! You guessed it! it was the impersonator who died on the throne in 1977. In the wake of his own death, Elvis lived and loved life as an impersonator of his former self... that is, until a broken hip landed him in the nursing home.

The Elvis we meet is a parody of his former glory, complete with prescription shades, gray mutton chops and an inability to do anything for himself. He watches those around him die alone and awaits his own turn with cranky complacency. Soon, though, as those around him start dying off at a slightly faster pace than usual, E. must band together with an elderly black man who thinks he's JFK to fight off an ancient Egyptian curse. Genius? Lunacy? Sometimes they are one and the same.

In many circles, Bruce Campbell is held in such high esteem that he is beyond criticism. That's actually pretty hilarious considering some of the unwatchable garbage he's been featured in. However, Bubba Ho-Tep might be his tour de force. His Elvis is all latex-rubbery faced, but I'll be damned if he doesn't bring some life to the character. Is it a broad impersonation of Elvis? When it needs to be. But more often than not he's playing exactly the kind of bitter old man you'd expect Elvis Presley to be if her were alive today. This is underscored by Campbell's portrayal of Sebastian Haff, the impersonator that Elvis switches with. Of course they look identical, but Haff is as awkward and bumbling as Presley is cocksure and suave.

Ossie Davis also shines as the character Jack. While we are led to believe that the guy the nurses call "Sebastian" IS really the King of Rock and Roll, it is pretty clear from the beginning that Jack is suffering from dementia and most likely is not JFK with a fresh, black paint job courtesy of the CIA. However, his conviction and drive through the film make you wonder if it's your reality or his reality that matters more. Is it more important that he IS who he says he is, or is it enough that he simply BELIEVES that he is? Elvis makes decides to go with Jack's delusions and it is hard to imagine anyone not following this leader of men into battle... even if he may not be the leader he thinks that he is.

As Jack and Elvis began to hatch their paln, I realized that I was watching a very formulaic story. It's been done time and again in other horror movies. You know... 1. Life around here is boring. 2. Something mysterious happens. 3. We go to the library to research our local, creepy history. 4. We use what's on hand to defeat the monster. It's the tried and true plot to every one of those kid-oriented horror movies from the eighties. But that's kinda what makes this movie so cool. Here these guys are in their golden years. Life's a never ending cycle of bedpans, ointments and pureed green beans. Of course it would take a childhood hero fantasy to fill them with the excitement to live life and do something bigger than themselves. Live or die, the fight is something different. It is a chance (possibly the last) to be useful and make a difference.

Be warned, Bubba Ho-Tep has the feel and (at times) the look of a film made on the cheap. However, it's a small movie that never tries to be more than that. Despite the manic action and batshit plot, it's the tale of two elderly gentlemen rediscovering themsleves and defeating a soul-sucking Egyptian pharaoh. Good stuff. If you haven't yet, you should watch this today!

Still Late After All These Years!

2010-01-25T20:51:00.008-05:00

With Conan O'Brien booted off of the Tonight Show and Jay Leno on his way back to 11:30, it seemed like an appropriate time to take a look at HBO's 1996 movie The Late Shift, which takes a look at the first time NBC decided to royally screw the late night pooch.

You see, back in 1991 the perception by some was that Johnny Carson was getting increasingly irrelevant. Ratings were slipping a bit and the brass at NBC were starting to worry about the future of their enormously successful late night block. Something had to be done. NBC, of course, got greedy and in an attempt to keep ahold of a "hot new talent" (Leno) and a proven talent they'd put ten years into grooming (Letterman) they wound up allowing themselves to be bullied in one of the epic clusterfucks of the 20th century.

We all know how it ended, so you'd think The Late Shift would be all about the whos, hows and whys. What we really get (aside from parade of forgettable,spineless executives)is a scapegoat in the form of Jay Leno's agent, Helen Kushnick (played here by Kathy Bates). Bates won a Golden Globe for her performance, but it's painfully obvious that she's simply phoning in (on a giant 90s car phone) a stock, fat 'n' sassy performance amped up to 10 on the retarded scale. Seriously, in the scene where she goes apeshit and knocks everything off her desk... it's just shockingly bad. Even more shocking is to think about what we used to accept as quality programming even as recently as 1996. This is HBO! The folks that gave us Oz, Sex and the City and The Sopranos. This crap makes Arli$$ look like friggin' Schindler's List. But I digress.

A lot of folks give props to John Michael Higgins' portrayal of David Letterman, and he deserves it. What begins as a pretty decent impression slowly becomes a fully developed character as we begin to glimpse the paranoia and distrust at the core of Letterman's character. Poor Daniel Roebuck, on the other hand, must have drawn the short straw.

Roebuck seemes like a genuinely nice guy, but anyone tasked with pulling off that lithpy, lilting Jay Leno voice is destined to look like a fool. And I haven't even mentioned the Leno make-up yet. Yup, they go for the full-on false chin. In fact, the jowl and chin prosthetic is so ridiculous that he looked more like Rocky Dennis than Jay Leno. And stuuupid? Do they play Leno stupid? He is waaay in the dark about everything going on around him. Of course, it's supposed to make him sympathetic, but he comes off as an inept manchild. He will hold onto his late night show. He will love it and pet it and call it George! Pathetic.

The Late Shift is a neat little curio of the early 90s late night wars, but beyond that it has little to offer. But I am psyched for the next two entries into what will surely be a trilogy of Jay Leno sticking it to other, more talented television hosts. Conan's royal screwing in 2010 will be the Empire Strikes Back of the series, while Jimmy Fallon's inevitable shafting in 2027 will bring it all to a close.

Or will it?

Crestwood House Monster Books: I Need These!

2010-01-18T22:01:00.003-05:00

Back in my elementary school days, the Crestwood House Monster books were the end all be all of horror. It was an astoundingly thorough collection (nearly twenty individual volumes) covering all of the most iconic film monsters. I'm sure I checked each and every one of them out multiple times during our once a week trips to the school library.

It was kinda cool. They were always way back in the farthest corner of the library. Lined up in a neat little row of tattered orange spines if you were lucky. If you weren't, there'd just be one or two loose volumes. Then, you were all like, "No! Please... don't let it be... Crap! 'The Deadly Mantis' is the only one left!" Didn't really matter. You knew you were taking it anyway.

Damn. Gotta get my hands on a set of these. Check out Paxton Holley's Flickr set for a stroll down memory lane.

Mega-Bite: Recipe Look

2010-01-13T14:35:00.004-05:00

In educational theory (and in the design world, and probably the world of filmmaking, too), visual thinkers are singled out for their aptitude for sight-based learning and understanding. While I don't consider myself a strictly visual thinker, I do have strong tendencies in that direction.

Those of you who are simlarly inclined may enjoy Recipe Look, a blog that catalogs visual representations of recipes, rather than the more common text format.

On the day I visited, on the top was a beautiful, simple illustration explaining how to stir-fry "Prawns, garlic and Chilli with Green Beans and Linguini."

It didn't have amounts for the ingredients, but most stir-fry recipes are just improvisations that someone has written down, anyway. And the circular graphic told me at a glance in what order to add the ingredients. I almost didn't have to read. I just absorbed. AND I LOVED IT!

(By the way, it reminds me of some of the beautiful photo illustrations in Thomas Keller's new Ad Hoc At Home cookbook, which I got as a Christmas gift.)

When I have more time, I'm definitely going to explore Recipe Look further.

And apparently, those of us so inclined could submit our own illustrations.

Just wanted to take a quick minute and share this exciting little idea with you.

(With thanks from HOW Blog for the link ... )

Remember the Titans?

2010-01-08T15:13:00.025-05:00

There's a renaissance afoot.

I haven't been this excited about a crop of upcoming movies since I don't know when.

And that's due not in small part to some particularly compelling trailers. (I'm hopeful that the films will live up to the hype. I stubbornly cling to faith in the art of filmmaking -- perhaps the only example of eternal optimism on my part.)

After a year in which we saw a dozen films, maybe, the anticipation is all the more welcome.

So take a look, and be enthralled. Set aside the skepticism. Downplay the disbelief. Get your hopes up, people! Maybe, if enough of us believe, we can will the movie world back to excellence.

Here's the rundown on what I can't wait to see:

Clash of the Titans

I have quite a nostalgic fondness for the 1981 original, stemming from middle school studies of Greek mythology for Super Bowl -- the academic battle of wits, not the one with all the Roman numerals. (Laurence Olivier as Zeus! Harry Hamlin as Perseus! An epic battle for our hearts!) So I was rather skeptical when I first heard rumors of a remake. But having watched this trailer. I'm sold, and I'm psyched.

The Wolfman

We've been waiting for this one a long time. It's been years since the news that Benicio Del Toro was to play the iconic Universal monster -- a great choice, I thought then, and still do.

Then, the movie got pushed back. And back.

But now, it looks like our wait might finally pay off.

The buzz has attributed delays to the need for time to work on fx. With Rick Baker, of An American Werewolf in London fame, on set, surely it will be worth it.

The A-Team

I know what you're thinking. Another remake?!? I thought I was sick of them too. But here I am, talking up a third one. And the source material for this one is classically '80s, too. But ever since the release of the first official picture of the main characters, I've been wildly hoping for the best.

The trailer showcases all the kitschy cache of the old TV show. (And, for you District 9 fans, note that Murdock is played by Wikus himself, Sharlto Copley.)

It promises to be a fun summer romp.

Shutter Island

Another long-anticipated film, the release of which was pushed back. Scorsese does terror. I reeeeally hope it works. And I really hope patient 67 isn't who I think it is.

Inception

Another Leo DiCaprio film, another thriller. Add Christopher Nolan (director of Memento, Batman Begins, The Dark Knight), and I don't need any convincing. This trailer messes with your head, leaves you with questions begging for answers ...

Hot Tub Time Machine

Continuing with the '80s theme ... This looks like it might be fun. And John Cusack comedy? Yes, please. The premise is simple: Four funny guys time travel by way of a hot tub. Hilarity no doubt ensues. (The trailer is red band for language. If you're offended, you can't say I didn't warn you ... )

Other notables

The Green Hornet -- I have to be honest and say that I don't know much about the source material. The Green Hornet's no Batman, after all. But director Michel Gondry is one of my favorite filmmakers -- such an artist! -- that I'm completely intrigued nonetheless.

Eclipse -- No trailer yet, but I have been looking forward all along to seeing what David Slade -- director of the great and terrorising vampire flick 30 Days of Night -- would do with the story. My prediction: Steve will hate it, I will enjoy it. The series (books and films) has its faults, but I'm tuned in till the end.

Machete -- So, seems as if the what-ifs might've gotten out of control on this one. It seemed like such a simple little story back when it was a mock trailer in the Grindhouse package. But now that it's materialized, in addition to the great Danny Trejo and Cheech Marin, it has Robert DeNiro, Steven Seagal, Jessica Alba and ... Lindsay Lohan?!? I love Robert Rodriguez, but I dunno ...

The Expendables -- Seems it's the year of the macho renegades. This one's no exception. Sylvester Stallone (directing and starring), Jet Li, Jason Statham, Mickey Rourke, Steve Austin, Randy Couture, Danny Trejo, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, David Zayas (Angel Batista from Dexter) and more. It's definitely got potential.

The Lightning Thief Greek mythology redux. Modern kids are the progeny of the gods. Director Chris Columbus has quite a pedigree (Adventures in Babysitting. Gremlins. Goonies.) Might be fun ...

The Last Airbender --M. Night Shyamalan. Dev Patel (of Slumdog Millionaire fame). Looks interesting. But compelling? Jury's out.

Morning Glory -- JJ Abrams. A newsman with scruples(?). Rachel McAdams. It's got good things going for it. Will I see it in the theater? I don't know. Maybe the trailer will get me more excited ...

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bite: ThaiTable.com

2009-06-12T04:28:00.007-04:00

If you liked the flavors featured in this week's Ingredient of the Week recipe, you'll find plenty more inspiration at this week's featured Web site: http://www.thaitable.com/.

Recipes featured one day this week included the classic stir-fry pad thai, an asian twist on a Southern U.S. favorite, crispy fried okra (grajiab tod) and the classic Thai dessert mango sticky rice (kow neuw mamuang). The recipes include pictures of various steps and are clear and easy to follow.

There's even a section for beginners near the top of the home page -- "Getting Started?" -- that links to pages exploring the basic Thai tastes and ingredients.

There's plenty more to peruse on the site too, to learn more about the Thai culture, along with travel tips, if traveling with your tastebuds doesn't suffice!

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on Friday, April 3, 2009 1:10 AM EDT

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the week: Lemongrass

2009-06-12T04:21:00.011-04:00

I admit it. We're in a rut.

Despite our best intentions, we eat out way too often.

When you're crunched for time on a lunch or dinner break, it's tough to find the oomph it takes to make a meal at home.

Not to mention that our oven/microwave combo has been out of commission for weeks. (Between ordering parts and scheduling appointments, the repair process has taken way too long. But we're hoping to be back in the baking business next week.)

Even without an oven, though, there's one particular category of food that is usually fairly simple to make on a weekend, with enough leftovers to last a few hectic weekdays: soup.

I love soup. I crave soup. And it's just not the type of thing that most restaurants do well. So a couple weeks ago, a trip to a supermarket in a neighboring county inspired us to cook up our own take on a Thai classic, Tom Ka Gai.

There were plenty of exciting things in the produce section that day. Parsley root. (What would that add to a braise or stew?) Purple carrots. (So familiar, yet so strange. Do they taste different than the orange ones?) Green and orange and purple cauliflower. (Roasted? Pureed? Curried, even?) But it was the lemongrass that we decided to bring home that day.

I've had Tom Ka Gai in a few different Thai restaurants, and I have to admit that they've been a little too heavy on the lemongrass for my taste. The woody stalk's distinctive tang quite easily crosses the line into overpowering. So we weren't exactly going for authentic. We focused on the main flavors -- coconut and lemongrass -- and built from there.

You might find recipes for this type of soup that call for plenty of exotic ingredients. Kaffir lime leaves. Special chilies or chili paste. Galangal. If you're going for authentic, there are Asian markets in bigger cities where you could probably track down such things, not to mention online shops.

But we were going for Thai-inspired flavor in a simple weekend soup. So besides the lemongrass, and the few drops of fish sauce we added (which you could get by without), everything in this recipe is quite easily obtainable here at our local groceries. We decided to add wonderful, meaty shitake mushrooms for a little more substance (which, I learned from online research, is similar to a common Thai variation, Tom Ka Het).

And the result was delicious. It balanced just between light and heavy, refreshing and creamy, bracing and comforting. The lemongrass flavor was there, but not overpowering.

So the next time you see lemongrass -- and who knows, it might be sooner than you think, with a new grocery opening here in our city this spring -- consider trying your hand at this Thai-inspired dish. We steamed up some basmati rice to pair with it, and I loved the two combined into one bowl, too.

Coconut, Lemongrass and Shitake Soup

Ingredients
2 cups canned low-salt chicken broth
1 14-ounce can unsweetened coconut milk
1/2 cup 1/4-inch-thick slices fresh lemongrass (at least two stalks)
Several chicken tenders, pounded thinner with a mallet and cut into pieces
1 tablespoon lime juice or more to taste
Soy sauce and fish sauce to taste (or, alternately, salt to taste)
Half a jalapeno chili (or whole one, if you like), chopped
1 package shitake mushrooms, sliced
Finely chopped fresh cilantro

Directions
Bring first 3 ingredients to boil in heavy medium saucepan. (If desired, you can place the lemongrass slices into a tea ball or tie it in cheesecloth before adding it to the liquid. It's simply used to flavor the soup; you don’t want to eat it, and putting it in some sort of straining device like the options mentioned above makes it far more simple to fish it out of the liquid.)

Reduce heat, add chicken and simmer until cooked through.

Remove the chicken to a plate. (You can add it back in later or save it for a different dish, like we did.) You can also remove the lemongrass at this point, or you can leave it in a little longer to impart a more of its flavor to the soup. (Even if you leave it in longer, the flavor's pretty mild. The amount used in this recipe is less than is used in a more authentic preparation, I suspect.)

In a small bowl, mix together lime juice and soy sauce and fish sauce, if using. (If you don’t use either of these sauces, you'll need to add salt to taste.)

Add juice and sauces, along with jalapeno and shitakes to soup, and simmer until reduced, about 20 minutes.

Remove lemongrass, if you haven't already done so.

If desired, add chicken back to liquid to reheat.

Adjust seasoning, adding more salt or soy/fish sauce or more lime juice, if desired.

Ladle soup into bowls, and sprinkle each serving with fresh cilantro (or stir the cilantro into the pot just before serving.)

Serve with rice as a side, or ladle soup over it. Another good garnish is Sriracha chili sauce, if you want to kick up the heat. (Just don't forget, a little goes a long way!)

Originally posted to The Grub Report by By Patricia Gibson on Monday, March 30, 2009 11:06 PM EDT

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bite: Baking Bites

2009-06-12T04:17:00.009-04:00

I'm getting back into this regular blogging thing rather slowly, I know. Forgive me.

But I have found another interesting food blog to feature this week in the Friday Night Mega-Bite: Baking Bites.

One recent post centers around a Consumer Reports review of frozen pies. (I know what you're thinking: "Gasp! Frozen pies? I would never serve frozen pies!" Well, I would. Don't get me wrong. Homemade pies are scrumptious and can be fabulously impressive. But sometimes, especially around the holidays, a full homemade menu just gets too overwhelming. And in times like those, this review would come in pretty handy!)

The featured pies were key lime and dutch apple. Marie Callender brand came out on top in both categories.

But I do have to say, if I were going to serve a frozen pie, it wouldn't be apple. Apple pies are so simple to make! Especially if you use a storebought crust. (I know, I know, homemade's better.) And a streusel topping is pretty basic, too.

My preferred frozen pies? Wick's. Perhaps Consumer Reports hasn't heard of this regional favorite. But their sugar cream pies are to die for. (A coworker recently was telling me how a family member's version was far superior. But then we both agreed that the recipe is so touchy, that when you're in a pinch or in a rush, Wick's -- which is based in Winchester, Ind., by the way! -- can't be beat.)

They also make a pretty tasty pecan pie, although variations like bourbon pecan pie or chocolate pecan pie can be pretty amazing and worth making at home.

What are your favorite holiday pies? Have any recipes you'd like to share?

Perhaps in coming weeks we'll share some of our favorites. I'm already excited for all the holiday goodness!

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on Published: Friday, November 7, 2008 1:14 AM EST

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bite: Rock 'n Rolling Pins

2009-06-12T04:15:00.004-04:00

Hello, Grub Report readers!Long time no write. It's been a crazy year. I know you all know what I'm talking about.

Without further ado, here's this week's featured food-related Web site: Rock 'n Rolling Pins.

It's a food blog, too. The author incorporates her love of music and food. Recent posts have posed questions like ... Can fondant be punk rock? Ms. Sassafras, as the author calls herself, also declared Halloween "the raddest holiday in existence."

The site's quite a fun read, and there are some great, fun ideas for cupcakes and more. So if you're looking for food with attitude, check out Rock 'n Rolling Pins.

Originally posted by Patricia Gibson to The Grub Report on Monday, November 3, 2008 11:27 PM EST

THE GRUB REPORT: A new rhubarb treat

2009-06-12T03:52:00.006-04:00

I had rhubarb left over from my recent pie escapade, so I rummaged through my cookbooks to find something new to try.

I decided to go with a concoction from The Gourmet Cookbook.

I won't reprint the recipe here, because this is a modern cookbook that is still in print (and one that I highly recommend adding to your library).

But I thought I'd tell you about it and share a picture.

It's a twist on the classic upside-down cake, which I'd only ever had made with pineapple. This one features rhubarb in the topping and anise in the batter. Turns out that rhubarb sings when used in this way. It's sweetness really comes out, and along with the sugar, just on the verge of burnt, it creates a melt-in-your-mouth layer with wonderful flavor.

The cake itself is rather remarkable too. The batter was wonderfully silky and it baked up into a dense but not heavy cake that would easily rival any boxed white cake mix (most of which would be too fluffy for this, anyway.)I do have to say I think if I made it again I'd go a little heavier on the anise seed, because I didn't get much of that flavor. But overall I'd say this is definitely a treat I'll make again.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on Wednesday, October 29, 2008 6:45 PM EDT

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Rhubarb

2009-06-12T03:42:00.020-04:00

About a month ago, at the June First Friday festival in downtown Marion, a spring specialty caught my eye at the produce stand. I couldn't pass up the chance to take some of the big, bright red stalks home with me. As I walked back to the office, more than one person among the crowds took notice. As I passed, I heard one or two say, "Oooh, rhubarb!"

Once I got back to work, though, the response wasn’t quite the same. "What," a coworker asked curiously, "is that?!?" She'd never heard of rhubarb. "Preposterous!" I thought. Surely rhubarb, the stuff we found growing in the backyard when my family moved to Yorktown when I was young, wasn't that unpopular. But once challenged to explain what, exactly, it is, I realized that there's nothing quite like it, nothing I could compare it to.

It looks like giant Swiss chard, with texture a little like celery and a taste like, well, like … Like nothing else! The astringent tang. The faintly fruity flavor (even though it is, technically, a vegetable). And the leaves are poisonous, by the way! But this description just doesn't do this wonderfully strange plant justice.

So I did a little poking around online to find out more about it. (I even found a rhubarb festival in a town that calls itself the rhubarb capital of Minnesota!) Turns out this vegetable grows from spring to fall in cooler climates. But it doesn't grow well once temperatures reach 90 degrees, so around here it's pretty much a spring and early summer crop. But it does require cold temperatures to spur it into sprouting, so it doesn't grow well in the South, either.

And, according to http://www.rhubarbinfo.com/, a plant will only grow for so many years before it just dies out. That's what happened to that old plant in my parents' backyard.

All these quirks together have given it the reputation now of being somewhat an old-fashioned exotic, I think.

Well, I say that's a shame. I'm going to lead the charge. I'm going to try my hand at growing rhubarb, and I urge you to too. According to what I found on the Internet, it's a fairly tough plant that can survive neglect. (Something those plants in my parents' backyard, the only plants still there when we moved in, were proof of.) So let's bring back into our regular rotation of treats.

Here's a recipe to help you do that. It features the classic combination of strawberry and rhubarb.

Strawberry Rhubarb Pie
Crust (for one 2-crust pie)
2 2/3 cups all purpose flour
2 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon salt
12 tablespoons (1 1/2 sticks) chilled unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-inch pieces
4 tablespoons chilled solid vegetable shortening, cut into ½-inch pieces
6 tablespoons (or more) ice water

Filling
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup golden brown sugar
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 teaspoon grated lemon rind
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
Pinch of salt
2 1/2 to 3 1/2 cups sliced fresh strawberries (about 16 oz.)
2 1/2 to 3 1/2 cups fresh (1/4-inch-thick) rhubarb slices (1 1/2 pounds or more)
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice (or less if you want your pie on the sweet end of the sweet-tart flavor combo)
1-2 tablespoons butter or margarine, cut into pieces

Make crust:
Mix flour, sugar and salt for crust in food processor or stir well.

Add butter and shortening. Using on/off turns with processor, or by hand with pastry blender, mix until mixture resembles coarse meal.

Drizzle 6 tablespoons ice water over mixture. Process or mix just until moist clumps form, adding more ice water by teaspoonfuls if dough is dry.

Gather dough into ball; divide and flatten each half into a disk. Wrap in plastic; chill until dough is firm enough to roll out, about 30 minutes.

Roll out half of dough on lightly floured work surface to 12-inch round (about 1/8 inch thick).

Transfer dough to 9-inch-diameter pie dish. Trim excess dough, leaving ¾-inch overhang. Chill, covered, until ready to use, up to 2 days.

Prepare filling:

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Combine first 5 ingredients; stir in strawberries, rhubarb, lemon juice and pinch of salt. Let stand 20 minutes.

Compose pie:

Meanwhile, roll out second half of dough to about a 13-inch round, about 1/8-inch thickness, and cut into 1/2-inch strips for lattice top.

Spoon mixture into crust and dot with 1 to 2 tablespoons of butter.

Arrange strips in lattice pattern on top of pie (five to seven strips one way, five to seven the other, basketweave pattern if desired), trim ends if needed, then fold under edges and crimp decoratively.

If desired, brush crust with egg/water wash or with water and sprinkle with coarse sugar.

Bake:

Place pie plate on baking sheet (lined with foil if desired) to catch drips.

Bake at 400 degrees for 20 minutes, reduce heat to 350 degrees and bake until pie is golden and filling thickens about 1 hour and 25 minutes.

Transfer pie to cooling rack and cool completely.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on Wednesday, October 29, 2008 6:45 PM EDT

THE GRUB REPORT: Grow your own

2009-06-12T03:37:00.008-04:00

I'm a firm believer in the idea that eating more foods grown close to home can have a positive environmental effect.

(Surely the reduction in shipping-related pollution would be exponential if everyone bought only a little more of the fruits and vegetables they ate were produced by area farmers and gardeners.)

I have yet to find a farmers' market here that offers much in the way of good or interesting produce from the local area, though. The closest market I know of that I've been impressed with is in Muncie, at the Minnetrista Cultural Center. But the nature of a farmers' market -- that you have to get there quite early in the morning to get the best stuff -- pretty much precludes me from making it there more than once a year or so. My mom shops there often, though, and sometimes picks things up that she thinks I might be interested in. (If you know of any good markets in the region, let us know!)

I also am fond of the idea of growing my own food. My grandfather was a prolific gardener. It seemed that anything he touched grew wild and produced amazing fruits and vegetables. It's a trait one of my uncles, especially, seems to have inherited. But it's a trait I seem to have pretty much missed out on.

I've tried various types of tomatoes. Chile peppers. Stuff that's supposed to be fairly easy to grow. But I get nothing. (I understand I probably just have a lot to learn. But I've come to be dubious of investing in plants only to get nothing in return.)

One thing that produces immediate results, though, is herb plants. That's what I find myself buying year after year. There's no waiting months for them to flower, then produce fruit or vegetables. There's really very little work involved, actually, with herb plants. The leaves and stems themselves are the prize. The day you bring them home, you can snip pieces off and add them to your plate.

We're trying to stretch our budget, just like everyone else these days, so this year I brought home a trio of my favorites. I might buy more as the season progresses, but for now, I stuck with what I know I'll use:

Cilantro. This is a staple in Asian and Mexican foods. You can usually get it at local groceries, and even when I grow my own I sometimes have to supplement with store-bought if I need a large quantity. But the spicy, clean flavor is one of my favorites (and smells great!), so I buy this every year.

Tarragon. This herb with long, slender leaves is a recently discovered favorite of mine. The taste is vaguely licorice-like. One of my favorite things to do with tarragon is mix it with butter and seasonings to serve with charcoal-grilled steak. Summer at its finest!

Flat-leaf parsley. I like to buy this herb plant because you often can't get the flat-leaf variety of parsley in local groceries. I don't much care for the grassy flavor or inexplicably dry texture of the more common curly variety. But the flat-leaf is a quite different experience. It's fresh, sometimes faintly spicy, and it adds a unique taste to dishes.

And so far this year, we're growing one more edible plant this year: horseradish. A friend passed along the leafy top from one of their home-grown horseradish roots, and it's now
happily rooting at our house. Steve was given the advice, upon receiving the gift, that when it comes time to use it, it's best to prepare it outside because it's so potent! Can't wait to see how it turns out. (And it seems very easy to propagate, which is a huge plus in my book!)

Are you growing anything interesting in the garden or containers this year? We'd love to hear about it. Share your experiences in the comment section below.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on Wednesday, October 29, 2008 4:30 PM EDT

THE GRUB REPORT: Cooking the Books: The Gourmet Cookbook

2009-06-12T03:36:00.009-04:00

My name is Tricia, and I'm a magazine addict.

I admit it.

I have to keep a pretty tight rein on my urge to subscribe, so I have pretty high standards there. A publication has to wow me every time if I'm going to lock myself in.

But during a trip to the bookstore -- or even down the grocery checkout aisle -- the temptation can be just to much to resist.

Beautiful covers on home-, food- and lifestyle-centric magazines can pull me in almost every time. But once I get them home, and excitedly peruse the contents within, I'm often with left with unfulfilled expectations.

That's where this week's book comes in.

The Gourmet Cookbook, as I mentioned in last week's Ingredient of the Week post, was a gift from Steve's mom.

It's not likely that I would have picked this one up off the shelf -- I'm usually more intrigued by a region- or cuisine-based recipe collection -- but I'm so glad she did.

This book is everything good about Gourmet magazine. It is a collection of what the editors considered the best of the best, culled from years of recipes that have run in the magazine. So, unlike a single magazine, which can build my expecations up and then leave me disappointed when the featured recipes don't quite measure up, there's enough in the book to intrigue and delight me for years to come.

And the almost academic flair Gourmet magazine brings to its study of food and culture is here in the book too: From advice on throwing the perfect cocktail party to a discussion of the provenance of various ingredients, there's plenty of fodder for all-around food fans like me.
And it is, true to the magazine's asthetics, a beautifully designed book. I don't know that I've seen a single-color scheme utilized quite so well in quite a while. And the fact that the color is yellow is all the more impressive. This is one of those cookbooks that I occassionally just sit down to read, to admire, to let it inspire me.

I'll be trying out a recipe for some sweet or another soon. (I promised a coworker I'd bring in some tasty treats.)

And the Parsnip Apple Puree was a hit for Thanksgiving.

Can't wait to try more!

(And next time I'm tempted to buy a magazine, maybe I'll just pull out this book instead.)

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on December 10, 2007 12:21 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bites: Foodpairing

2009-06-12T03:34:00.008-04:00

Getting out the door quietly should be the easiest part of my morning routine, but my complete lack of fashion sense causes me to fail this objective time and again. Because I have next to zero confidence in my wardrobe decisions, I constantly have to stir my snoozing spouse to weigh in on such perplexing quandaries as, "Can I wear this belt with these socks?" or, "Is it okay to wear a striped shirt with this sweater?" I'm sure it's aggravating, but I have a perpetual fear of arriving at work in a mismatched ensemble that'd make Emmett Kelly blush.

It's not that I'm incapable of dressing myself. I'm not a 30-year-old in desperate need of over-sized Garanimals. It's just that I'm not always confident in my ability to pair individual pieces together to make a cohesive "outfit."

Creating one new thing from a collection of smaller pieces can be a pretty daunting task, and it is with this in mind that I present this week's Mega-Bite, Foodpairing, a site designed to help make sense of the endless combinations that stare back at you each time you open the refrigerator door.

The site essentially plots food items in a web based upon the number of shared flavor compounds. The shorter the strands between items, the closer the flavor profiles of the foods.

For example, if you click on a relatively innocuous foodstuff such as roasted chicken, you are presented with an additional thirty items that exist within the same general area of the flavor spectrum. Sure the obvious choices (broccoli and potatoes) are there, but more interesting are the seemingly "out there" combos that pop up. I mean, I've never had roasted chicken with chocolate or black tea, but now my mind is working overtime devising different ways to combine them.

Make no mistake. This site is not a recipe site. It's not the place to turn if you're looking for a quick recipe to get on the table in an hour. Instead, this is one for the culinary Miles Davises out there. It's for those willing to improvise in the kitchen and push the boundaries and expectations of the audience. Foodpairings gives you a key signature, a context to work within, and it is up to you to bring the style and artistry to the table.

The Web site: Foodpairing

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on November 30, 2007 11:22 PM

Comments
At December 1, 2007 9:35 PM, Bill Lewis said...
Steve, the eternal question has always been what to do with leftovers? After spending time in France I'll admit to a certain French bias in my cooking. (Most of my cookbooks are pre- "nouvelle cuisine" French). Their historic solution to leftovers is to include them in either an omelette or crepe. (Legend states the reason for the invention of the crepe was to accommodate leftovers).
Obviously some leftovers, for example, mashed potatoes or parsnips, would not be suitable. However, many seafood, poultry or vegetable dishes would make an excellent filling.
Leftover mashed potatoes can be made into "potato pancakes". They are referred to as "latke" in certain parts of the US and Europe. Usually you form the remaining potatoes into patties and fry/sautee them in oil/butter.Delicious!!

At December 1, 2007 10:42 PM, Bill Lewis said...
Personal note: I'm aware that foodpairing, and my comments concerning leftovers, may not be exactly "on track". But I think the foodpairing procedure is very relevant for determining what to do with leftovers.

At December 4, 2007 5:55 PM, Shannon White said...
I'll be sure and check out your socks tomorow at work — When in doubt, "brown is the new black, you can wear white any time, and if you can see your panty line ... they're too tight".

At December 5, 2007 11:24 PM, Steve Gibson said...
Bill, with just Tricia and I in our household reappropriating leftovers is the MOST important application of food pairing for us. It's what keeps me from having to eat the exact same thing for multiple meals over multiple days.
The omelette is indeed my go to player a lot of the times, but now you have me itching to break out the ole' crepe pan and get busy. If only I could keep from slathering them with Nutella and scarfing them down while standing over the burner I'd be in business!

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Parsnips

2009-06-12T03:32:00.005-04:00

This week's ingredient could be in the running for one of the most underappreciated items in the produce section.

Like their cousin the carrot, parsnips shine in both sweet and savory settings. They certainly are one of things that have quite a strong fall feel, but they can be a year-round addition to the table.
When the fall and winter holidays roll around, however, I'm always reminded of my love for parsnips. The pale, sweetly earthy root veggies always seem to pop up on my Thanksgiving menus.

This year they were showcased quite beautifully in a recipe I found in a cookbook that was gift last year from Steve's mom, The Gourmet Cookbook: Parsnip Apple Puree. It was a perfect pairing with the turkey. Don't mind the gravy, just pile on the parsnips, please!

But the best way I can think of to introduce the parsnip to those unfamiliar with its distinctive flavor is as a twist on that old staple carrot salad.

According to epicurious.com, we have the Moroccans to thank for putting this dish on the map.
But my favorite incarnation is what's sometimes billed as Southern-style. It can incorporate just about any add-in that strikes your fancy (or whatever you have on your shelves). The foundation is, quite simply, carrots and a mayonnaise-based dressing.

Here are the basic proportions, but you can vary it to suit your preferences.

Carrot-Parsnip Salad

Ingredients
1 pound carrots, peeled and shredded or grated
1/2 pound parsnips, peeled and shredded or grated
3/4 cup or more of add-ins (see list of suggestions below)
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1 tablespoon Miracle Whip, or to taste (Note: If you don't have Miracle Whip, use granulated sugar to taste. You want the dressing to have a tinge of sweetness.)
salt and pepper to taste

Instructions
Mix carrots, parsnips and your add-ins together.

In a separate bowl, mix mayonnaise, Miracle Whip (or sugar) and salt and pepper together until well blended.

Fold dressing mixture into carrot mixture. If mixture is too dry or too wet, adjust proportions accordingly. (Add more mayo if it's too dry, more carrots if it's too wet. But remember, if you let the mixture set, it will get more soggy.) Then you're ready to serve.

Add-in ideas
-- The standby is raisins, and they're perfectly tasty. But you can also try golden raisins or some of the more "gourmet" raisin mixtures out today.
-- Other dried fruits, such as apricots or dates or even pineapple, chopped into small bite-sized pieces. (Canned pineapple can also be nice. Just make sure you drain it well and chop it up.)
-- Nuts, such as pecans, walnuts or pistachios.
-- Dried shredded coconut.

And we'd love to hear of any other combos you come up with!

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on November 28, 2007 11:33 PM

Comments

At November 30, 2007 12:40 AM, James Cramer said...

When I was traveling in France it seemed like pureed parsnip was served with just about every lamb or beef dish I ordered. Just sitting there like a soggy pool of wet mashed potatoes. I did start to kind of like it as a condiment for the meat, sort of like a creamy horseradish. But I never did develop a full appreciation for the carrot's poorer cousin.

At December 4, 2007 2:27 PM, marti mckelleb said...

My experience with growing my own parsnips is that the soil is most important. We raised the pale yellow parsnips in the '70s, and they tasted as though you had soaked them in honey. Yummy. So perhaps the European soil is depleted. I did rather like the parsnips I had in Budapest. And also the rutabagas.

THE GRUB REPORT: Cooking the Books: Rice Cooking

2009-06-12T03:30:00.004-04:00

In other parts of the world, rice is a diet mainstay. I think I could certainly be happy with that kind of diet. I love the stuff.

And I'm not talking the over-dressed, over-salted stuff you find on the grocery stores, presented by friendly faces with names like Uncle Ben.

I'm talking about freshly steamed, fragrant, snowy mounds of the stuff.

And that's why I picked this week's cookbook — Rice Cooking by Robin Howe — from the shelf at an antique store or flea market I've since forgotten.

As I flipped through this cookbook (published in 1959, by the way), I lamented the fact that the author repeatedly shielded her readers from authentic, adventurous fare with the reasoning that her contemporaries didn't have the necessary ingredients easily accessible. Howe was obviously well-traveled and in this book gives glimpses into the wonders of food in various parts of the world, but she stops short (understandably so) of giving recipes for such dishes.

It made me grateful, however, for the variety of foods we can find even here in Grant County in this modern age.

So, much of the book's recipes seem to fall flat. The section on sweet dishes, however, offers intriguing possibilities.

I'm a huge fan of rice pudding. I have been ever since I can remember. So it's been fun in recent years as my culinary horizons expanded to discover that many cultures have versions of this dish. And Howe includes many of these traditional dishes, along with some that seem less traditional to me, but sound delicious nonetheless.

A couple I'll be trying:

-- Rice and Lemon Meringue Pudding: Inspired by the pie, certainly, with a toasty meringue topping and everything.

-- Rice and Date Layer Pudding: Billed as an Iraqi dish. I love dates, and this dish's casserole-like construction intrigues me too.

And one more recipe that snagged my attention: Rice Waffles. Howe lists this as an American invention, though I have never heard of such a thing. (Have you?) I can't quite envision the final product of this recipe, which incorporates cooked rice into a waffle batter. I'll just have to try it sometime when I have leftover rice!

A side note on rice:Another kitchen appliance we didn't know we couldn't live without came into our kitchen as a gift: Our electric rice steamer.

This nifty machine actually sat in our cabinet for months before we used it for the first time. How hard is to cook rice, right? But once we tried it, we haven't looked back. You just add the rice and water, according to the machine's measurements, and you turn it on. Then, you're free to continue prepping the rest of your meal, since you don't have to watch this pot. In a while, you'll hear a happy "ding!" and your rice will be ready and fabulous.

Another side note on rice:The type and quality of rice does matter. There's short grain (like arborio, the kind used for Italian risotto), long grain (like basmati, the fragrant beauty from India) and others in between.

You often can't find much variety here, so I confess that when we go out of town, we buy big burlap bags of the more exotic varieties, especially basmati.

Our message, though, would be this: Don't be afraid to try new types of rice when you find them. You can certainly find information about the different types and their uses on the Web, along with suggestions for cooking. Don't let unfamiliarity prevent you from finding a new favorite!

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on November 26, 2007 10:37 PM

Comments

At November 28, 2007 11:22 AM, Angie said...

I purchased a microwave rice cooker earlier this year... we love rice, and though I was skeptical at first, I love this little contraption! (Our electric rice cooker was having some problems, and I ALWAYS boil it over on the stove.) Go rice - and microwaves!

THE GRUB REPORT: Out of candy corn? Make your own!

2009-06-12T03:29:00.004-04:00

For me, the days and even weeks following Halloween are a series of sweet surprises, each one striped in orange, yellow and white. Yup, candy corn is probably the most iconic of autumnal treats, and for the three weeks before and after October 31st it's hard to get away from (not that you'd want to).

Yes, like freeloading grains of sand after a beach bash, candy corn have a habit of popping up in the most unlikely of places and well after the party's over. Don't get me wrong. I love it. That last sweet morsel desperately clinging to the bottom of your plastic jack-o-lantern? That errant wedge hiding behind the coasters? They're all fair game, and each one provides a small, unexpected bit of pleasure in the ever-shortening days of November. But, as we all know, even the simplest pleasures cannot last forever.

Sadly, by the time you realize that you've discovered and devoured the last of the hidden booty, it becomes next to impossible to buy more. The gargantuan packages that were so abundant on store shelves just a month before have gone the way of the dodo, and you're left wishing you had savored that last piece to its fullest. It's a nagging feeling that can leave you empty for a full 12 months.

With this in mind, I thought I'd link to a recipe for homemade candy corn so that others might not have to endure this pain. But first, couple of caveats before you attempt this recipe:
To achieve a flavor closer to that of traditional candy corn, I might suggest cutting the corn syrup in half and replacing it with 1/3 cup of honey.

Also, to achieve the classic three-stripe look, wait until your dough has come together, divide it into three equal portions and knead the food coloring into the dough. Roll the portions into individual ropes and flatten with your rolling pin.

Finally, don't panic if you taste them right away and they're a bit off. Give them time to sit. I'm convinced that one of the primary agents in flavoring the candy corn we know and love is time. You know they've had plenty of time to sit and develop their flavors on the shelf — maybe since last Halloween!

You can find the recipe here.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on November 1, 2007 12:33 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Pantry raid

2009-06-12T03:28:00.004-04:00

We're always looking for something new to try, so when we come across an appealing idea or recipe, we'll tuck it away for a weekend, when we often spend a little extra time cooking together.

Last Sunday, though, was an end to a long week, so we were both thinking pizza. (I wanted takeout, Steve was thinking frozen.)

But then we remembered we had some homemade tomato sauce in the freezer, from a summer surplus of tomatoes in a family member's garden. And that got us to thinking. Why buy a pizza when we could just throw together our own?

At first I lamented that ingredients would likely cost us more than buying a frozen pizza, but the more we thought about ingredients we had on hand already, the more I liked the idea.

We had the sauce.

We had ricotta (which I've already established is one of my favorite ingredients -- we like to drain it a little and use small globs of it on pizza, something we learned to love at a gourmet pizza joint in Indy).

We had a wedge of parmesan cheese (though we ended up swapping it with some shredded cheeses).

So we took a quick spin through the grocery to add to the stockpile:

-- A tube of pre-made pizza dough (which we drizzled with hearty olive oil once we had it spread out in the pan and ready to bake).

-- A tub of sliced baby portabello mushrooms (which we opted for because they were the same price as the sliced white button mushrooms but pack a little more flavor).

-- A package of sliced soprasetta, a peppery type of salami made with pork and, in this case, at least, wine. It was everything good about salami but with just the right tanginess. Marvelous!

-- A couple bags of shredded cheese (mozarella, of course, and a blend of five different types dubbed "Italian").

-- A red onion (which we used about half of, sliced thinly).

All in all, the bill (when you take into consideration that we used only a portion of most of the ingredients, and not counting the ingredients we had on hand) came in under $5. Where can you get a gourmet-style pizza for that price?

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on October 30, 2007 12:10 AM

Comments

At November 1, 2007 11:24 AM, Angie said...

We make pizza at our house each Friday night... I like the idea of using dabs of ricotta along with the mozzerella - thanks for the idea! (We use it in lasagna, and I like the other ideas you shared a few weeks ago, but I hadn't thought of pizza. Yum!)

THE GRUB REPORT: Out of the dirt and into your oven

2009-06-12T03:23:00.006-04:00

For some time now, I've been interested in the idea of cooking in an "earth oven." Also known as pit roasting, it's a process that's been around since the dawn of man but has recently enjoyed a bit of notoriety thanks to those travelogue/cooking shows that are so prevalent on cable. You've surely seen it before. One of the big celebrity chefs heads out to some remote Pacific island or South American locale and partakes of a feast prepared right there in the dirt.

It's labor intensive, primal and, most importantly, supercool. The only problem is that I imagine the neighborhood association would probably have something to say about a gargantuan, smoking hole in my front yard.

In a quest to bring pit roasting into my home kitchen, I looked at a number of recipes, trying to find one that I thought might accurately replicate the flavors of slow cooking meats in the earth.

In the end, I settled on a classic pork dish hailing from the southernmost states in Mexico, cochinita pibil.

Like another of my favorite dishes, carnitas, the brilliance of cochinita pibil lies in its simplicity. I'm a firm believer in the fact that you can never go wrong with simple, slow roasted pork, but this recipe goes one better. The pork in this dish is complimented beautifully by being steeped and then cooked in a spicy-sour marinade of citrus juices and annatto.

Annatto is peculiar in that it seems like a rather exotic spice, but in reality you probably consume a great deal of it every day. Due to their vibrant red hue, annatto seeds are commonly used as a food coloring and even in the production of many cheeses. The flavor of annatto is fairly mild, yet a bit sweet and peppery.

As a side note, the banana leaves are not essential to this recipe. It would certainly still be a delicious meal prepared inside a tinfoil pouch, but if you can find them (usually frozen) I suggest you give them a try. As the leaves begin to dry, they impart a faint smokiness to the meat that gives it a flavor that is closer to pit roasting than any other home cooking technique can achieve. (As seen in the photo above, banana leaves are big, beautiful, fragrant things. You'll probably have to get them at an international grocery or special store. Sometimes they can be found fresh, but we used frozen ones and they worked beautifully.)

Cochinita Pibil
5 Tb. annatto seeds
2 Tb. Mexican oregano
1 Tb. black peppercorns
1 1/2 tsp. ground cumin
1 1/2 tsp. ground coriander
1/2 tsp. whole cloves

1/2 stick cinnamon
8 garlic cloves
1 cup orange juice
Juice of 1 lemon
1 tsp. salt
1 boneless pork shoulder
1 package frozen banana leaves (optional)

Combine annatto, oregano, peppercorns, cumin, coriander, cloves and cinnamon in a grinder and pulse until the spice mix is fine and thoroughly mixed. (The fine grind is important; you don't want chunky spices to stick in your teeth, do you?)

Add the spice mix, garlic, orange juice, lemon juice and salt to a blender, and blend until the marinade is smooth.Cut the pork shoulder into two-inch cubes. Place the pork into a gallon storage bag with the marinade and shake to combine. Allow the pork to marinate over night (at least six hours).

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.Line a roasting pan with the banana leaves (or tinfoil), leaving enough hanging over the edges to cover. Pour the pork and marinade into the center of the lined pan and fold the leaves over the meat. Cover the roasting pan with tinfoil, making sure it is sealed tightly.

Place the pan into the oven, and roast for six hours or until the pork is extremely tender.

Serve with warm corn or flour tortillas and habanero salsa.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on October 5, 2007 06:01 AM

THE GRUB REPORT: Gather 'round the table

2009-06-12T03:22:00.003-04:00

Tricia and I work opposite shifts.

I wake up at 5:30 in the morning, get ready for work, we say our groggy goodbyes and I don't see her again until dinner. After dinner, we part and don’t meet again until our next early morning encounter.

It's a maddening cycle that continues through the work week, with an all too short respite on the weekends.

For this reason, we always try to make the most of that dinner hour. That's our time, and we both work hard to keep others from intruding upon it.

We decided early on that because dinner time is our one chance during the day to catch up with one another and truly be ourselves, it'd be a time of relaxation and comfort around the dinner table. But, as often happens, we've gotten a bit lax as of late.

Too often, the hustle of work and life in general keeps us from enjoying this time to the fullest. We seldom get a chance to sit down and enjoy a meal and discussion on its own. We get bogged down with chores and errands and find ourselves scarfing down our dinner like it's just another task to cross off the "to-do" list.

Oh, and cooking? I'm ashamed to admit how difficult it is to justify cooking a real-deal meal with so little time and for just two people. And I know a lot of other people are in the same boat as we are.

We are lucky, as a nation constantly moving at terminal velocity, to have the National Pork Board (and not just because bacon and pork chops are so darned tasty). In their infinite wisdom these purveyors of porcine goodness have taken it upon themselves to provide us with a yearly reminder of the importance of taking time to gather around the table for dinner. Since 1996 they have sponsored National Eat Dinner Together Week, an effort to get the American family back into their seats around the dinner table.

From Sept. 16 through 22, I hope you get a chance to enjoy the company of your own friends and family around the supper table.

Visit the NEDTW Web site: http://www.togetherfordinner.com/.

Download Some Recipes for Inspiration: http://www.togetherfordinner.com/aspx/dinnertimesolutions.aspx.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on September 18, 2007 04:08 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Cooking the Books: Mexico One Plate at a Time

2009-06-12T03:21:00.008-04:00

A cookbook focusing on the cuisine of a particular country or region is always a gamble. With a quick perusal, the flavor combinations that represent a far-off land are always seductive, but the question always remains as to how practical the recipes are. Are they able to be adapted to your weekly dinner routine, or is the book destined to produce a "one off" meal and retire to the boneyard of discarded culinary tomes?

In order to avoid such a travesty, it's wise to choose a cookbook that can easily mesh with what you are already doing in the kitchen. I suggest a book featuring ingredients and techniques that you are familiar with, and, outside of Italian, no other regional cuisine has had more effect on the American palate than Mexican. So it only makes since that building a base knowledge of Mexican cuisine would behoove anyone, and few other books can assist you in this effort better than Rick Bayless' Mexico One Plate at a Time.

As a fan of Bayless' own TV programs and appearances on others', it was easy imagine that his books would be a wellspring of information on all things edible south of the Rio Grande, but what came as a surprise was how well rounded the book was. Not only does he explore foods from the border towns all the way down to the Yucatan, but he does so in a way that assures you that home cooking down Mexico way is not so different than home cooking 'round these parts.

Sure, he expounds on the virtues of obscure chile varieties and other produce peculiar to the open air markets of Central America, but he also goes to lengths to explain how the flavor combinations might be approximated for those home cooks who don't have access to a wide variety of Central American produce. One of the most interesting features of the book is Bayless' inclusion of two different recipes for many of the ingredients and techniques he covers.

The first is the most basic, the "tradicional" version of a Mexican classic. The second is a modern version that might take aspects of the first and riff on them like a jazz musician drawing upon influences far and wide. In this, Bayless makes his book into more than just a simple cookbook. It is a kitchen reference that allows you to build up a base knowledge and then push the limits of what you can do.

With one (admittedly extended) check out from the public library, I've already worked a few of the recipes into my own repertoire. In fact, I've stocked up on the piloncillo just because I loved the super-simple arroz con leche recipe that much! I'm confident that if you check it out, you’ll soon be making space for it on your own shelf. I know I have.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on September 17, 2007 11:57 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the week: Ricotta cheese

2009-06-12T03:19:00.004-04:00

This week's choice was actually inspired by my last pie escapade.

(I had enough crust dough for two pies, so a few days later I made one of my favorites, the one that the pie crust recipe I used actually goes with.)

Ricotta cheese shows up in many Italian favorites of mine. Manicotti. Ravioli. Lasagna. Cannoli.

And it played a supporting role in an the Ingredient of the Week recipe for fresh figs a few weeks ago.

It's a very flexible ingredient that pairs well with many different flavors, savory and sweet. But it is the star of the show in this week's recipe, Ricotta Pie.

Oddly enough, this dish was added to my repertoire after being mentioned on The Sopranos many years back.

Ricotta Pie (prounounced ri-goat, apparently, by authentic, or psuedo-authentic, Italian-Americans) was one of the standard features in the family's -- or is that Family's -- menu. So we decided to make one of our own. From the first bite, it became one of my favorites.
It has tinges of the familiar cheesecake taste, but with a decidedly different texture, far less creamy. And it just tiptoes onto the sweet side, like its cousin the cannoli, another ricotta-based pastry. The original recipe I found (and as usual have forgotten exactly where) had chocolate shavings included in the filling, but we've since opted to forego those, finding they didn't add much to the final product.

The crust is one of the more unusual I've made. It's very tender, to the point that you have to take great care when transferring it to your pie plate. But the result is a subtly sweet crust much more like a crisp, delicate pastry than the solid crunch of a typical pie crust.

Here's the recipe:

Ricotta Pie

Ingredients
(Crust)
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup shortening
1 egg, beaten
1/4 cup milk
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
(Filling)
1 1/2 pounds ricotta cheese
3/4 cups sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt

5 eggs beaten

Directions
(Crust)
Place flour in large bowl. Cut shortening into flour until mixture resembles coarse meal. Mix in the one beaten egg, milk and vanilla extract, stirring just until combined and dough forms a ball. Separate 1/3 of the dough.

On well-floured surface, roll out bigger portion into a 12-inch circle; transfer carefully to 9-inch pie pan. (I've found that the usual method of rolling the dough onto the rolling pin to transfer to the pan does not work well with this fragile dough. I fold the circil in half, then in half again and transfer to the pan, then unfold.)

Preheat oven to 325 degrees.

Retrieve smaller portion of dough from refrigerator, and roll into a rectangle. Cut into strips, and reserve for top of pie.

(Filling)
In a large bowl, mix ricotta, sugar, salt and five beaten eggs. Spoon or pour into pie shell. Use strips to form a lattice on top.

Bake in preheated oven for 90 minutes, or until a knife inserted into the filling comes out clean.

Cool before serving, and keep leftovers refrigerated.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on September 9, 2007 07:55 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Cooking the Books: Smoothies

2009-06-12T03:16:00.006-04:00

Ahhh, summer. The heat. The allergens. The sunburn.

(Yes, you guessed correctly: Summer is not my favorite season.)

In fact, heat like we've had recently makes we want to hide deep in the recesses of my house. And even with the lights off and the air on, cooking can seem like quite a chore in times like these.

This week's book -- Smoothies: 50 Recipes for High-Energy Refreshment -- will help you through these drippy, suffocating days. (Or, if you actually like weather like this, it will give you ideas for great poolside treats.)

I came across this beautiful little book during a summer I spent in Minneapolis.

Before I lived there, I imagined Minnesota would be quite different from Indiana in the summer. When I traveled there during the spring break before my summer, to scope out housing, it SNOWED in APRIL, for crying out loud! Not a flurry, mind you. A ground-covering, fast-falling snow. So I did not expect the 80s and 90s I encountered. And the humidity.

So when this book offered me refreshment, I jumped at the chance.

And it's more than just a few suggestions for fruit combos to produce high-brow Squishies.

There's a glossary of fruits, letting you know when and how to pick 'em, and what to do once you get 'em home. (The standard smoothie fare, oranges and bananas and the like, are there, but have you ever considered a rhubarb smoothie? The authors of this book have. They put a new twist on the classic strawberry-rhubarb combo.)

There's also a look at the extras that make a smoothie a smoothie. Sure, fruit is the dominant flavoring, but the liquids can range far beyond fruit juice. Rice milk, anyone?

The equipment and technique sections are blissfilly short, part of the appeal of smoothies in the summer. Little work, a lot of payoff. What's it take? Here's the short version, straight from Smoothies: "Buy fruit, cut fruit, blend fruit. It is that simple. The average smoothie takes 12 minutes or less to prepare." Heavenly!

The recipes are broken down into four sections: Wholesome Mergers, No-Moo Blends, Decadent Medleys and Drunken Concoctions (for those of you looking for a little less goodness).
So if you're tired of fast food and trying to beat the miserable heat, this book just might be the key.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on August 13, 2007 12:31 PM

Comments

At August 15, 2007 6:31 PM, Nicole Noffsinger said...

Subway used to have the best smoothies and even had where you could have added vitamin supplements added. Is there anywhere around here to get a decent smoothie?

At August 21, 2007 12:02 PM, Angie said...

I just noticed the question Nicole left... Payne's has WONDERUL smoothies! I particularly like the berry blast (with four kinds of berries) - you can have it made with custard or healthy additions. (This is right off of I-69 exit 59, sort of behind Cracker Barrel.)

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Fideos (With Video!)

2009-06-12T03:14:00.007-04:00

A few weeks ago, Tricia and I were browsing the aisles at a local discount store and were surprised by the selection of food they carried. Not by the quantity, mind you, but by the variety. Because they primarily stock those items that have failed to sell elsewhere, the food offered runs the gamut from exotic to inedible.

Intrigued by the notion of purchasing foods available at a discount store, I thought it would be fun to try to make a tasty meal exclusively from discounted items. Sure, the odds were not in my favor, but in the end … well, I'll let you decide. Here's the video. I'm calling it "Dollar Store Gourmet."

Watch the video here.

Fideos with Clams

Ingredients
2 7-oz. packages fideos
1 medium onion, sliced
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 Tbsp. olive oil
1 14-oz. can chicken broth
2 13.7-oz. packages crushed tomatoes
2 3.5-oz. packages whole baby clams
1 tsp. kosher salt
1 tsp. paprika
ground black pepper to taste

Directions

Bring olive oil to medium heat, and add fideos. Sautee until they are golden brown, and drain on paper towels.

In the same pan at medium heat, add garlic, onion, tomatoes, salt, pepper and paprika. Let it simmer for 15 minutes.

Add broth and the reserved fideos to the pan and let simmer for an additional five minutes.

Add baby clams (along with juices they are packed in) into the pan, and simmer for an additional 10 minutes. Remove from the heat.

Preheat broiler, and spoon the fideos into oven-safe bowls. (The flatter your bowls, the more surface area will be exposed to be crisped up.) Place bowls beneath broiler until tops of fideos are browned and crispy.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on August 4, 2007 12:59 PM

Comments

At August 10, 2007 10:50 PM, Bill Lewis said...

Steve Gibson, I think the video is a great idea. Permit me to cite a previous article that suggested ordering specialty food items over the Internet. For example, someone wanting to try your recipe for fideos with clams may be hard pressed to find fideos locally (maybe La Poblanita?). I've used Amazon.com on a few occasions and discovered they have a large variety of specialty foods and ingredients. However, I'd advise your readers to be careful, since the shipping costs can sometimes be more than the item ordered. Your recipe contains two of my favorites, pasta and clams.

As an aside, one of my favorite restaurants in the whole world is Umberto's Clam House in New York City. They serve the best linguine with white clam sauce on the planet.(It's in the New York City dining guide and is located in the center of Little Italy. If anyone is traveling to NY I'd recommend it). Umberto's has been prospering in NY for over thirty years. That says something for a city that is very hard on the restaurant trade. Food critics rule and new restaurants come and go overnight based on their reviews. After moving back to Marion, I discovered that there must be a cosmic gazillion varieties of tomato sauce in the local markets, but no white clam. After a quick search I was able to locate a large selection on Amazon.

Your idea of "Dollar Store Gourmet" was very good. Maybe next you can try "Gourmet Recipes from Our Sisters of Charity Soup Kitchen". (Just joking)

At August 12, 2007 7:25 AM, Scott Hutcheson said...

Love the video and love the "Dollar Store" concept!

THE GRUB REPORT: Squash fever

2009-06-12T03:12:00.003-04:00

It's officially zucchini season.

Last Sunday at church, some friends brought in a grocery bag full of zucchini big and small, overabundance from their garden to share.

We love zucchini, so we took a few.

But what to do with them?

It figures into one of our favorite one-pot meals, chicken, rice and vegetables with a Moroccon flare.

And back in May, Angie suggested a veggie variation on crab cakes that puts a new spin on zucchini.

Of course, there's always the old standby, zucchini bread.

But there's a recipe I've been wanting to try for months, or even years: zucchini pie.

I'd never heard of this concoction util I attended my first Mississinewa 1812 a few years back. This annual fall festival / living history event is one of my favorite things about Grant County, and the turkey noodle soup and squash pie served by one of the vendors is one of the highlights for me.

The first time I tried that squash pie, I vowed I'd make it someday. Today was that day.
I had scrounged for recipes online the last time I had the urge to make this dish, but I can't remember which site I ended up pulling this one from. (My guess is Cooks.com.) I used some others there for reference today, trying to come up with the best way to replicate those flavors I savor every fall out at the battlefield.

I think this one had the best formula and best directions, except for one thing. It doesn't have a total cooking time. It just instructs the baker to "cook until set."

I've baked many a pumpkin pie in my life, and since this is a custard pie that's somewhat similar, I figured I'd have no problem. I was wrong. My pie came out just this side of burnt, and the texture of the filling verged on curdled. (In my defense, I had to leave it in a warm oven so as not to be late for work, because it still seemed to jiggly to remove. I think that was what pushed it over the edge.) But the taste! It was just what I was hoping for!

So next time, I'll know that "set" for this pie is still rather loose. It's more runny than your typical pumpkin filling, and the end result should be far less dry. Now I know. In the meantime, I'll be enjoying my not-quite-perfect pie anyway.

Here's the recipe I used:

Zucchini Pie
Ingredients
1 1/2 cups zucchini - peeled, seeded and sliced
1 cup evaporated milk
2 cups white sugar
1 egg
3 tablespoons margarine or butter
3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 pinch salt
1 recipe pastry for a 9-inch single crust pie (or a store-bought crust)
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg

Directions
Boil zucchini until tender. Drain and let stand in cold water for about 5 minutes, then drain. (Alternately, spread out on a heat-safe surface and let cool, which is what I did while I was making my pie crust dough.)
In a large bowl, combine zucchini, evaporated milk, sugar, egg, margarine, flour, vanilla and salt. In two batches in a blender, blend until smooth. (I tried to put it all in the blender at once, as the original recipe said. Boy, what a mess I made!)
Pour into unbaked pie shell. Sprinkle with cinnamon and nutmeg. Bake at 425 degrees farenheit for 5 minutes. Reduce heat to 325 degrees and bake until set. (And remember, this is a very loose set. It will still be very jiggly, but it will firm up in the refrigerator. Next time, I'll start with about 45 minutes, and go from there.)
Do you have any recipes you turn to when you have extras from the garden?

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on August 2, 2007 11:34 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Arrivederci, Garlic?

2009-06-12T03:11:00.006-04:00

Throughout history, attitudes toward garlic have shifted back and forth. Some early Christians believed that it first grew from the footprints left behind by Satan after he left the Garden of Eden, thus proving it the most evil member of the onion family ... Beelzebulb.

Then, of course, you have the numerous European cultures who believed the plant to have protective powers. A little dab of the potent little bulb around even the slightest openings was sure to protect your house from ghosts, demons, werewolves and a wide variety of Draculas.

Today, I think that we have sided with the latter group. While we don’t attribute any supernatural qualities to garlic (apart from being magically delicious), we know now that the old-timey ideas about its protective powers weren’t so far off base. In fact, many scientists believe it provides a number of health benefits.

It has been touted as an anti-inflammatory, effective in reducing pain associated with arthritis. Some have said it is an anti-bacterial, able to put the kibosh on those nasty infections that seem to get passed around every few months. Some even say cooking meat with garlic greatly reduces the cancer-causing agents that result from the cooking process.

Despite all of the positive claims about garlic, a growing faction of cooks and food enthusiasts shares the aim of banning garlic in the cuisine of (gasp of shock and horror) Italy!

"No!" you say.

Yes, the birthplace of all things garlicky and wonderful is turning against garlic, citing its overpowering flavor, indigestibility and general stinkiness as reasons for giving it the boot.

Don't believe me? Check out the article here, and then come back and share your favorite garlic-centric recipe.

(Thanks to Susan for the heads up on this story!)

Weblink:
http://www.corriere.it/english/articoli/2007/06_Giugno/19/aglio.shtml

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on July 25, 2007 07:56 PM

Comments

At July 26, 2007 11:32 PM, Bill Lewis said...

Steve Gibson, how do we know we are not being mislead by a coven of vampires? They could be the actual masterminds behind the anti-garlic campaign in Italy! (I couldn't resist that). It's interesting how many myths have revolved around food. I agree with you that most of the enlightened world has thrown off these holdovers from medieval times. However, I'd like to point out that they still exist in some rural and isolated areas of Europe, and here in Indiana for that matter. I cannot seriously envision Italian cooking without garlic, olive oil and tomatoes. Those are the three basic ingredients of Mediterranean cooking. I've noticed some recipes will substitute shallots for garlic if some find garlic bothersome. (I use both for some recipes).
Since portobello mushrooms have been currently available at Marsh (the north Marion store) I will share my simple recipe for sauted portobellos. (Portobellos have been jokingly described as overweight creminis). I've discovered that the flavor of mushrooms is greatly enhanced by garlic.

Cut the mushrooms in strips and saute in olive oil and garlic, (I add a little butter as well), salt and pepper to taste. Saute until tender. Sprinkle with chopped parsley. The whole process only takes 10-15 minutes and can provide an easy to prepare, different and delicious side dish.

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Lychees

2009-06-12T03:07:00.007-04:00

When I'm at the grocery, I often find myself grabbing exotic items even though I have no real plan as to what I might do with them. It's due to the transient nature of the produce section at local groceries. What's here today might not and probably won't be here tomorrow.

So, you have to forget about planning meals ahead of time. You gotta get what there is to be gotten now and figure out a way to use it later. Such was the case when I happened upon a display of lychees.

Lychees are native to China and a staple of many Asian cuisines. They have a tough skin that's easily removed to reveal a somewhat fibrous white flesh. Their taste is a bit musky and unlike any other fruit that I can think of.

Since my experience with lychees has been exclusively in the realm of Thai cuisine, I felt like I should incorporate some of the classic flavor combinations from the region. Red snapper is pretty abundant in the Indian Ocean, and in Thai cuisine it is often paired with citrus or chilies to contrast its delicate flavor.

In our recipe, we forgo the citrus in favor of lychees in order to give the dish a subtler, more complex flavor.

Red Snapper with Lychee Chili Sauce

Ingredients
Sauce
1/3 cup lychees, chopped
2 shallots, chopped
1 red chili, seeded and chopped
1/2 inch ginger root, peeled and chopped
1 tsp. brown sugar
1 Tbsp. fish sauce (optional)

Fish
4 red snapper fillets
4 Tbsp. soy sauce
1 Tbsp. vegetable oil
6 scallions, sliced
2 Tbsp. cilantro
1 red chili, seeded and sliced lengthwise

Sauce
Combine lychees, shallots, red chili, ginger root, brown sugar and fish sauce in a blender. Blend until the mixture is smooth.

Fish
Cut four or five shallow, diagonal slits on the skin side of your snapper fillets and place them in a shallow pan.

Coat both sides of the fish with the soy sauce. Heat the oil in a large frying pan, and fry the fillets, one at a time, for five minutes on each side, or until the skin is browned and the flesh is tender and flaky.

Spoon the lychee chili sauce over the fillets and garnish with cilantro, scallions and red pepper strips.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on July 19, 2007 08:43 PM

Comments
At July 21, 2007 12:10 AM, Bill Lewis said...
Steve Gibson, that looks like a very good recipe. I'm going to try this one if I can find some red snapper. I've seen lychees in the market.
My first taste of Asia, in Asia, was dried lychee "nuts" usually served with other appetizers during the pre-dinner cocktail hour(s). (I was "immersed" in Asian culture almost immediately after graduating from college and leaving Indiana. My first assignment was in East Asia where I spent an interesting thirteen months.) Fresh Lychees were usually included in fruit salads during the summer months. I always thought they tasted, and the fresh ones resembled, strawberrys.

At July 22, 2007 11:12 PM, Steve Gibson said...
Bill, I love hearing about your travels and hope one day to have the opportunity to visit some of these places myself.
Oddly enough, I discovered lychees at a Thai restaurant in Minnesota. It was the same day that I discovered the fruit called, "durian." They told us that we didn't want it, but that just made us want it all the more.
I know now that they were right. They brought it out and it smelled like an open sewer.
I guess in Thailand they actually have banned the eating of durian on the subway due to the stink! Yeah, I think I'll just stick to the lychees.

At July 25, 2007 2:46 PM, Bill Lewis said...
Steve Gibson, I'm hesitant to relate my travel/culinary experiences for fear it will be interpreted as bragging. I can assure that is not my intent. My job(I'm retired) required a lot of travel. The job related travel, in addition to my personal trips, have taken me almost around the world (literally).
I've not heard of "durian" but based on your description that is a culinary experience I will avoid. Of a similar nature Korea has a national dish called kimchi. It consists of fermented vegetables and is usually heavily seasoned. The smell alone is enough to discourage any casual American tourist from sampling it. In this particular case I will say "thank God for McDonalds in East Asia (not Europe).
I really enjoy your Blog and thanks for permitting me to provide my small contribution.

THE GRUB REPORT: Kitchen Tool Box: Immersion blender

2009-06-12T03:06:00.009-04:00

As a person who enjoys food a great deal and spends a lot of time cooking, when gift giving holidays roll around, I usually score more than my fair share of kitchen gadgetry. Of course, a lot of the stuff out there is good for one or two specific jobs and hardly worth the trouble of pulling them out from the dark recesses of the cabinets, but every now and again you find something you never knew you couldn't live without.

Quite a few such treasures have found their way to our house over the years by way of discerning family members. One of them is the immersion blender I received two Christmases ago.

Also known as a stick blender, an immersion blender is the Great Compromiser of the kitchen. Honestly, there is no single blending job that an immersion blender does better than any other piece of kitchen equipment, but what it can do is perform many of the tasks relegated to food processors, bar blenders and food mills pretty darn well.

Where this little baby really earns its keep is during clean-up. At the sink, your average bar blender or food processor becomes a brain teaser, defying you to disassemble, clean and then reassemble it in a timely manner. Cleaning an immersion blender, however, is as easy as running the blade in a little bit of soapy water.

If you have a blender and a food processor, I'd say that there's no real need to go out and get one of these. It will save you a lot of time cleaning up but will not offer any applications you cannot already perform. If you have neither a blender nor a food processor, though, you might consider buying an immersion blender instead.

Immersion blenders can come with a lot of bells and whistles. Mine, the Cuisinart Smart Stick, has three additional attachments that I've never used. But above all things, I think there are two key features you should always seek out when shopping for an immersion blender. A metal shaft is essential. It will allow you to blend directly in a pot, without worry that the intense heat will adversely affect your equipment. Also, avoid single piece models. Sure they are cheap, but the easy clean-up argument is moot if you can't remove the blending shaft for cleaning.

Since we've been writing the Grub Report, I've rediscovered the stick blender's many talents. In just about every blending application (Salsa Verde, Curry Paste, Hummus) I've opted for the stick blender over other options, and I've come to wonder why I waited so long to move it up to the varsity squad.

Do you have any kitchen equipment you can't live without?

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on July 18, 2007 11:50 AM

Comments

At July 19, 2007 12:59 PM, Margaret Adams said...

I have two kitchen gadgets I can't live without. 1. My mini chopper. I use this little gadget to cut everything.2. My little brother that I can get all kinds of ideas and recipe's from. Really like your blog.

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Figs

2009-06-12T03:04:00.004-04:00

Okay. I admit it. We fudged on the rules a little this week. Our beautiful fresh figs came from one county over. But when I saw them at a grocery store in Muncie, I just couldn't pass them up.
Fresh figs are one of those foods I covet. There's just nothing like them. The dried or Newtoned varieties are fine, but they can't hold a candle to the sublime smell, taste and texture of the fresh fruit, in my book.

I remember the first time I had a fresh fig. It was straight from the tree in the back yard of my uncle's parents, immigrants from Italy who had settled in California. I've loved them ever since.
The figs we found were the deep purple, plump, teardrop-shaped Mission variety. They came five to the package, piled in one of those ubiquitous plastic hinged-lid produce boxes. And when my family came up for a visit last weekend, it was the perfect opportunity to make a simple, fresh dessert that showcased the figs.

I picked up a small tub of ricotta cheese (another of my favorite ingredients) from a local grocery and used about half of it, and I pulled out the tarragon (one of my favorite herbs) that was in our fridge, left over from a batch of tarragon butter that accompanied steaks we grilled recently. I also had to pick up a new bottle of honey, and opted for the darker (and consequently cheaper) version, because I wanted a heavier flavor.

The resulting dish was nothing short of divine. Or at least my dad -- from whom I must've inherited my love of figs -- and I thought so. I have to admit that the rest of the group were underwhelmed. The reviews ranged from "It's OK" to "It's weird." So if you find fresh figs and try this concoction, you'll probably get mixed reviews, too. But you may just find that you, too, will become a fig devotee and dream of the day when you'll get the chance to enjoy them again.

Here's the recipe:

Fresh Figs, Tarragon Ricotta and Honey
Ingredients
Fresh tarragon leaves, roughly chopped (I'd estimate it was a teaspoon or a little more, but you could vary it to your taste)
Ricotta cheese (about half a small tub is enough for five figs)
Fresh figs (any variety will likely do, but Missions work great with this flavor combo)
Brown sugar (about a half a teaspoon per fig, or more if you wish)
Honey (enough for generous drizzles across each portion)

Instructions
Mix the tarragon into the ricotta, preferably a few hours before so the flavor infuses into the cheese somewhat.

Set the oven to broil. Slice the figs in half from top to bottom, and place them on a sheet pan or any oven safe dish. Sprinkle generously with brown sugar, and broil for a few minutes. (Time will vary from oven to oven. Just make sure you keep close watch on them. You want the sugar caramelized, but the difference between that and burnt is a matter of seconds.) Let cool while you prepare the plates.

Spoon cheese onto plates. (Quenelles are a nice way to go, but any neat mound or dollop will do, really.) Place the figs next to the cheese, and generously drizzle all with honey.

Do you have any foods you love but can't often find? Or do you have any memories of the first time you tried a favorite food? We'd love to hear about them.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on July 11, 2007 07:30 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bites: Chocolate and Zucchini

2009-06-12T03:02:00.004-04:00

This week's Mega-Bite showcases one of the fabulous things about food: the fact that so many of our memories are tied to it.

I've been to Paris twice.

The first time, I was in high school and traveled there with other members of the Spanish Club. (Yes, we went to Spain too.) We spent a few days there, and the thing I remember most about the food is actually the breakfast we were served at the hotel. Those breakfasts sparked my love of real, buttery, not-to-sweet croissants.

The second was a day trip from London, with my then-boyfriend, now husband, Steve. We were both studying at Ball State's London Centre at the time, and took the opportunity during a break from classes to spend a day in Paris. The only thing I remember eating that trip was a baguette and some Laughing Cow brand cheese.

It's a startlingly beautiful city, but it can be a bit abrasive and overwhelming, too.

But reading this week's featured Web site, Clotilde Dusoulier's Chocolate and Zucchini, overshadows any negative feelings I still carry and reminds me of what is fabulous and beautiful there.

Chocolate and Zucchini is a great place to go to get inspiration and recipes. It's almost a diary of Clotilde's daily kitchen adventures. And the discussions tagged onto the blog entries usually feature Clotilde bantering with her readers, passing on knowledge or discoveries or just sharing the wonder of an especially good dish. I'm sure she quickly becomes like an old friend to frequent readers.

Clotilde also recently produced a beautiful book based on her blog. It's on my wish list of cook books to buy.

If you've been to Paris, I'm sure you'll find memories flooding back too. And if you've never traveled there, her blog will fill your imagination with intriguing scenes and inspiration for great dishes to try.

The Web site:Chocolate and Zucchini

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on July 6, 2007 09:30 PM

Comments
At July 9, 2007 11:00 PM, Bill Lewis said...
Mon Dieu, mon Dieu, you're in Paris, the capital of the country that produces the best wine and cheese in the world, and you're sampling La vache qui rit (Laughing Cow)? Laughing Cow (gasp) is a processed cheese and the French equivalent of Cheez Whiz.
I agree with you that Paris is a "startlingly beautiful city". On my first trip to Paris I stayed at the Hotel Voltaire which provides a fantastic view of this startling beautiful city. (I am not recommending the hotel since it is currently undergoing renovation.)
I've noticed that the better French hotels usually bake their own croissants daily and that accounts for the "fresh baked" flavor. They really are fresh baked. The same is true of the bread and pastries.
Having grown up in the cultural "backwater" of Marion I was surprised at the high quality of the bread in Paris. My first visit taught me that all bread is not the "doughy" white bread I was accustomed to in Marion. We "manufacture" and "process" bread and cheese here of course but they are not really on the same par as the French products.
I enjoy your Blog very much. Please keep the recipes coming.

At July 9, 2007 11:18 PM, Steve Gibson said...
Bill,
The saddest part is that doesn't even scratch the surface of our culinary atrocities while in Europe. That was back in a time when we were into the "cultural experience" but hadn't yet figured out how it all comes back to the food. Tricia and I were just talking the other day about how we'd love to go back and slap ourselves for not seeking out great food during our time there. I only hope that one day we'll have the opportunity to go back and right all of those wrongs!

At July 10, 2007 12:18 AM, Patricia Gibson said...
I know, it's a travesty. But, in our defense, we were totally out of our element and ran into some testy workers at the metro and the grocery (who refused to serve us if we couldn't converse in French -- I hate to perpetuate a stereotype, but I can attest that it's true in this case). So we grabbed what was familiar on the go, since we only had a day for our whirlwind sightseeing. (No excuse, I know! I wish, looking back, that we would have at least taken the time to stop in a restaurant. But money and time constraints dictated otherwise, and, like Steve said, we didn't know at the time how much we were missing.) To this day, though, Steve won't eat anything with a laughing cow on the label!

At July 10, 2007 9:58 PM, Bill Lewis said...
Steve and Patricia Gibson, I hope you didn't interpret my comments as being critical. That certainly was not my intent. I wanted to point out the humor and irony of your situation. I realize the French can be intimidating to Americans, especially, when it comes to language.
Again, I'm not attempting to be critical but it's always helpful to understand some basics of the language of the country you travel to. For example, I speak a passable French and have not had any difficulties in France or their "departments" in the Caribbean (Martinique and Guadeloupe). You have a very good idea about returning and visiting the attractions you missed the first time. Particularly the great restaurants Paris and Europe has to offer.
I Have currently been traveling in Italy and find it both interesting and educational. However,I feel a little bit at a disadvantage since I don't speak the language. You mentioned that Paris can be a "little bit overwhelming" I found that to be true in Florence. After spending a few days in the Uffizi I was struck with a minor "epiphany". This relatively small area (Tuscany), was the birthplace of the Renaissance, the most significant contribution to culture in world history. No small feat.
My niece just returned from the Ball State London Center and enjoyed the experience so much she didn't want to come back. I think its a very good idea to learn at a young age there is more in this world than Elwood, Indiana. But the experience, for some of us, can be both educational and overwhelming at the same time. But maybe that is not a bad thing.

At July 11, 2007 7:28 PM, Patricia Gibson said...
Bill:
No offense at all taken! The irony is well-recognized on our end. It's a running joke, really, with us that we traveled to what is arguably one of the culinary capitals of the world and didn't manage to take advantage of it!
As far as language barriers go, a mission trip to Mexico kind of revolutionized my outlook on that. As we were crossing the border back into the U.S., a border guard, half in jest, initially insisted we converse in Spanish with him. I've taken several years of Spanish classes, but only a rudimentary grasp of the language has stuck with me. And in an intimidating situation like that, even that knowledge escaped me. Once the guard gave us a good scare, he relented. But it really opened my eyes as to how selfish it is that we assume everyone should be able to speak perfect English, here and anywhere we go in the world, if they want to converse with us.
(But I'd never let that stop me from traveling, if I had the means. I'd like to think I've become a little more savvy along the way since our day in Paris, and I think today the experience would be quite different.)
I agree wholeheartedly about traveling at a young age. It is amazing how much you can learn about the world and yourself. And you'll never find a better deal than those student trips! I always tell people considering overseas study to go for it, if they can afford to at all.

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Tomatillos (plus a video!)

2009-06-12T02:55:00.004-04:00

Blogging each week on a specific ingredient has helped me grow accustomed to explaining my purchases when I reach the checkout at the grocery. It never fails. The cashier can be completely zoned out and ambivalent to my presence, but as soon as they get to that one moderately obscure item, they wanna know all about it.

This week, I had resigned myself to the fact that I'd most likely not get to have my little food chat with the cashier. Tomatillos, after all, aren't exactly exotic, right? Well, to tell you the truth the cashier showed more interest in my bag of little green spheroids than I have ever been confronted with. She asked a few questions about them, and I did my best to answer them.

Then, the bag boy also got in on the action, asking what they were and what I was going to make with them. It was a little bit awkward, and I began to feel as though people were craning their necks to see what kind of alien produce I was buying. I am truly convinced that if I would have stayed long enough, they would have called the manager over to marvel at them for a while.

I guess it's pretty cool that people are interested in learning more about foods they might not immediately reach for on their own. Honestly, though, tomatillos shouldn't be that scary. As the name implies, they are related to the tomatoes you and I slice up for our burgers, but admittedly have a look and a taste that's very different. While they are usually covered in a dry, brownish husk, the actual fruit of a tomatillo is (or should be) brilliantly green and firm. (It's actually in its unripe stage, but that's when it's best.) The fruit has a fresh, tart flavor that lends well to a variety of applications (one of my favorites is a pork loin recipe from Emeril: Bam! ); the most traditional use of the fruit is in salsa verde.

While salsa verde can mean any variety of green sauces used south of the border, the most popular use of the term refers to the sauce made with tomatillos. Similar in many ways to the red salsas made with tomatoes, salsa verde has a much brighter, tart flavor.

Feel free to switch out this salsa verde in just about any application where you'd use standard salsa, including but not limited to sitting on your couch with a bag of Tostidos.

Salsa Verde

Ingredients
4 cups tomatillos, husked, rinsed and diced
1 medium onion, diced
4 cloves garlic
1/2 cup chopped cilantro
4 jalapeno peppers, seeds removed
1 tsp. salt

Directions

Roast the jalapenos under the broiler (find the tutorial here)

Combine all of the ingredients in a food processor (or in a bowl if using an immersion blender) until pureed.

Cover and refrigerate.

So, I suppose you're wondering if salsa verde is available at the grocery, in jars just like the red stuff we love so much. Of course it is, but the real question you should be asking is whether or not it's as good as the homemade.

Well, we've decided to do the taste test for you. Check out our very first video (yup, I said first ... so be gentle) wherein we pit store bought salsa verde against our very own recipe in a no-holds-barred bout that I'm calling "Supermarket Death Match."

Watch it here.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on July 4, 2007 02:50 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Cooking the Books: Cookwise

2009-06-12T02:54:00.004-04:00

We have a pretty ample library of cookbooks in our kitchen, but despite the quantity they can all be divided in to two distinct categories. The majority of them are recipe collections. You know, those old ragged tomes where you've dog eared your favorite peanut butter cookie recipe or the recipe for the only edible tuna casserole in existence. Then there are those precious few that serve as reference books. Sure they have recipes, but their primary goal is to teach, to provide you with universal truths that you can use to overcome a variety of kitchen conundrums. This week's featured book, Cookwise by Shirley O. Corriher, falls into the latter category.

Think of it as a lab manual for your kitchen. Each chapter is like a unit of study focusing a specific realm of cookery (bread, pasta, desserts, etc.). Shirley demystifies the cooking process by presenting the science in terms even a dolt like myself can understand and explains why successful cooks do what they do.

After you've finished reading your "lesson," she provides you with a recipe as a sort of application assignment, a chance for you to test out what you've learned.

Be sure to check out the "Round Rueben" recipe. It's a Rueben sandwich that's actually baked inside a big round of rye bread. I took it to a Super Bowl party a couple of years back and am still hearing about it!

They have this book at the library. But you're going to want to buy it. And a highlighter. You'll want to take notes.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on July 2, 2007 11:57 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bites: The Good Beer Show

2009-06-12T02:53:00.002-04:00

Tricia and I have been spending the last month or so sampling the seasonal offerings down the local beer aisles, and I have come to one conclusion (those of you who consider beer flavored with fruit blasphemy might want to look away here): Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy is pretty much the nectar of the gods. Admittedly, it tastes more like lightly hopped lemonade than a lightly fruited beer, but after a brutal session of lawn mowing, I could probably put down a gallon of the stuff.

So, yeah ... it's probably clear that I know next to nothing about good beer, but I'm learning with the help of this week's Friday Night Mega-Bite.

The Good Beer Show, a podcast produced just down the road a ways in Muncie, is a loosey-goosey discussion of all things beer. Ringmaster Jeffrey T. Meyer and his "merry" band of drinkers review the wide variety of micro-brews and imports available at The Heorot, one of the largest beer halls in the Midwest.

It's a party atmosphere, beer-fueled discussions on beer (not for the faint of heart!) with a little bit of local rock and roll thrown in for good measure.

Check it out, and you may swear off of "big brother beer" for good.

The Web site: The Good Beer Show

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on June 22, 2007 11:45 PM

Comments
At June 25, 2007 10:11 PM, Bill Lewis said...
Steve Gibson, another good article. In the immortal words of the great philosopher and strategic thinker Frank Zappa, "You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline...or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer." Wisdom in its highest form. I have a tendency to be a hidebound traditionalist when it comes to beer. I'm not very fond of the fruit flavored varieties. In my humble opinion, if you want a fruity flavor, buy a good Beaujolais.(Marsh has a good "Beaujolais-Villages" that is moderately priced).
When you imagine the combination of "beer and country" Germany quickly comes to mind. Beer has been a traditional part of the culture for probably several hundreds of years. This is manifest in the annual "Octoberfest" which began in Bavaria and seems to have spread throughout much of the Western world.(Obviously Muslims have problems with the Bacchanalian nature of the festival.) However, I think it's going to take some time for fruit flavored beer to be accepted in Munich. A rasberry flavored lager? Come on Steve!!!

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Frog Legs

2009-06-12T02:50:00.004-04:00

It's ironic that what's available in our own backyards is often considered exotic eats. I'm constantly spotting snails sliming their way up and down our deck, but I have yet to work up the nerve to break out the garlic butter and enjoy some escargot. And while I get downright angry at them eating our tomatoes, the idea of stewing up a cute and fuzzy bunny for a little hasenpfeffer nearly brings a tear to my eye.

Why do we shy away from snacking on those critters that are so readily available? My guess is because they aren't available at our local mega-marts and we are so disconnected from the preparation of our own meats that we'd never think of doing it for ourselves.

Come to think of it, that's probably smart. While many decry the modern grocery as the reason that "we don't know where our food comes from," it has most likely contributed to the longer life-expectancy we enjoy these days. To be quite honest, I'd rather go through life believing that meat spontaneously appears shrink-wrapped on polystyrene trays than wind up raving mad after gnawing at the hind quarters of a sickly animal. So, it's probably best to let the backyard beasties be until such time as they appear at your local meat counter.

For me, that day came sooner than I expected. The other day while cruising the grocery aisles I came across an oddly beautiful sight. It was a chorus line of hefty frog legs looking like they were ready to begin high kicking to the strains of "Hello Ma Baby". I had never tried them, but I knew that they were considered a delicacy in many cultures.

The cuisines of France and China have a tradition of using frog, but around here, if you wanna do frog legs right, you gotta go south. Our recipe is essentially a variant on southern fried chicken. I mean, what do you always hear? It tastes like chicken, right? We actually thought the flavor, and texture for that matter, tended more toward fish. Regardless, we hope this recipe will serve to simultaneously put the squeamish at ease and please the most diehard frog fans out there.

Southern Fried Frog Legs

Ingredients
4 frog legs
2 cups buttermilk
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 tsp. Old Bay
1/4 tsp. garlic powder
1/4 tsp. onion powder
2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. black pepper
2 eggs, beaten
2 cups panko bread crumbs (*see note below)
vegetable oil (for frying)

Directions:

Pour buttermilk into a bowl and add frog legs to marinate for at least one hour. Toss once or twice to ensure a good soak.

Mix flour, Old Bay, garlic powder, onion powder, salt and pepper.

Remove the frog legs from the buttermilk, and dredge in the flour, then in the beaten eggs and finally in the breadcrumbs. Set the legs to the side while you preheat the oil for frying. Once the oil is heated, fry the legs on both sides until they are evenly browned (approximately 6 to 8 minutes).

*A note about panko: Panko -- often stocked in the small Asian staples section at grocery stores -- is a Japanese-style breadcrumb that is more coarse and flaky than the breadcrumbs you might be used to adding to meatloaf and the like. It is fabulous for breading, and will make a real difference. If you can find it, use it. You'll be glad you did.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on June 20, 2007 03:11 PM

Comments
At June 22, 2007 11:09 PM, Bill Lewis said...

Steve Gibson, great article. I can remember my dad cooking frog legs when I was a kid here in Marion. One bit of advise though, you may want to cut the Achilles tendon before sauteing. They have a tendency to "jump" while being cooked because of the expansion of the tendon. This "jumping" could scare the poop out of a novice chef.

Your chicken recipe looks very good. There is a French version for "Cuisses de Grenouille aux Herbes" that calls for drenching the legs in flour and sauteing in butter and garlic until brown and served with parsley. Detailed recipe may be available on-line.

I tried Escargot in a small bistro in Montmarte(northern Paris) called Le Cirque. (I could not leave France and say I had not tried Escargot.) They were fabulous. I think the taste comes more from the garlic and butter sauce than the snails themselves. Both Escargot and Grenouille are generally served as appetizers in French restaurants.

Speaking of local delicacies, what about the Morel mushroom, which grows wild in this part of Indiana. We used to "hunt" them in the woods around Marion but we referred to them by another name. (A name which is too obscene to print.) We would soak them in salt water overnight to get the bugs out of the cells. They are fantastic sauteed in butter and garlic.I noticed they had them in Marsh for almost $50 a pound. Talk about sticker shock.

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bites: The Hungry Hoosier

2009-06-12T02:48:00.006-04:00

If you're anything like us, you tend to plan your trips around food.

I've put in hours of research to keep from missing that "can't miss" meal while on vacation, but, sadly, right here in my own state I've been content to stumble about blindly, trying unknown restaurants at random. It's a hit-or-miss affair at best.

This week's Friday night link promises to put an end to the madness.

The Hungry Hoosier is the ultimate guide to eating out in the Hoosier state. Food writer Scott Hutcheson travels near and far to give us the lowdown on Indiana's eateries. With the copious amount of news and reviews cross-referenced by city and county, planning your next gastronomic odyssey will be a breeze.

Seeking out good food is an easy way to make even short trips special. And with gas prices as high as they are, being able to find the good stuff close to home might be the key to keeping to keeping both your wallet and your stomach full.

The Web site: The Hungry Hoosier

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on June 15, 2007 11:10 PM

Comments
At June 18, 2007 3:47 PM, scott said...
Steve:
Thanks for the pointer to my site. I like the blog you guys have here. Keep up the good work!
Scott

At June 18, 2007 4:12 PM, Adam Wire said...
Another good source is a book titled "Dining Secrets of Indiana." I bought my copy at a Barnes & Noble a few years back, if I remember right, and it's updated every few years (to account for restaurants that have opened or closed since then). Grant's County's own Ivanhoe's is mentioned in my copy, as well as The Hostess House and Converse's Herschberger Essen Haus.
See you next time you're in the mood for Carnitas.

At June 18, 2007 8:08 PM, James Cramer said...
Cool site! It is always fun for me to try a new restaurant in a new place but I am always taking a chance on being disappointed. It is nice to have some sort of guide. But it looks like we need to invite him to dine with us in Grant County so we can get a few more listings.

At June 19, 2007 2:48 PM, Bill Lewis said...
I have an autographed copy of Michael Atwood's "The Best of Heartland Cooking". Atwood was at Waldenbooks (in Marion) for a book signing a few years ago. It contains some unique recipes. I don't know if I'd really recommend it or not. However, I agree with James Cramer. This is a "cool site".

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Gooseberries

2009-06-12T02:44:00.006-04:00

As a kid, I loved gooseberries. So sweet, so succulent, they were my favorite part of the canned fruit cocktail we often enjoyed as dessert. While the fruit ratio was obviously skewed to encourage the coveting of cherries, it was always the pale green orbs that I kept in my bowl to savor after everything else was gone.

A few years ago, I had the opportunity to assist in the baking of a gooseberry pie and couldn't resist the urge to pop one of the beautiful berries in my mouth. In about a sliver of a nanosecond, I realized that something was wrong. These were not the sweet and succulent treats of my youth. No, these seemed more like little caplets of battery acid; sour beyond all comprehension. And my mouth, completely independent of my brain, decided to evict the fruit.

With my mouth agape, my face twisted in abject horror, and (with gooseberry innards dribbling down my chin) I was the laughing stock of the kitchen. I had inadvertently revealed my ignorance of the fruit known as the gooseberry.

As you probably already knew, what I grew up thinking were gooseberries were, in reality, grapes (made tastier by steeping in heavy syrup). And the implosion of my tongue upon meeting with an actual gooseberry will always stand as a harrowing reminder to question bizarre and often downright incorrect hillbilly nomenclature I grew up with in the kitchen. (Not to get too far off topic, but another hard lesson learned involved the difference between mangos and green peppers.)

Despite the pain and distress dealt to my mouth, I did discover that, prepared correctly, gooseberries can be a beautiful thing. So, when a big bag of fresh berries came my way over the weekend (Tricia's mom looks out for us like that) I knew right away that this week we'd be making a pie.

I know that you can pick up gooseberries canned in a syrup, so please be aware that this recipe calls for fresh berries. Using all of this sugar with the canned berries would most likely cause your teeth to disintegrate halfway through your first slice.

Also, you should know that before you get to the fun stuff, you have to pull the stems and tails off of each ... individual ... berry. It's a bit tedious, but worth the effort.

It took me just a hair less than an episode of SVU to do a quart of berries.

Finally, a note on crust. Everybody has their favorite recipe. For a basic crust we often turn to a Pillsbury cookbook that we've had for years. But there is no shame in getting a little assistance directly from the Dough Boy himself. Crusts from the refrigerated section of your grocery are surprisingly flaky and infinitely easier than rolling out your own.

Gooseberry Pie

Ingredients
4 cups fresh gooseberries
1 cup sugar
3 Tbsp. quick-cook tapioca
2 Tbsp. unsalted butter
1/4 tsp. nutmeg

Cut stemmed gooseberries in half. Mix berries and sugar in a saucepan over medium heat. Stir until sugar is dissolved and mixture is clear (about five minutes). Stir in tapioca and simmer for five minutes. Stir in butter and nutmeg and allow the mixture to cool.

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Fill a 9-inch pie crust with the filling and cover with a second 9inch crust. Press to seal the crust edges and cut slits in the top to vent. Bake for 20 minutes, then cover the edge of the pie with foil. Bake an additional 30 minutes.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on June 14, 2007 03:45 PM

Comments

At June 16, 2007 8:55 AM, Misty Henry said...

Lol, my grandmother in Logansport had a bush of these growing in her backyard-I got ahold of one just one time, and had the exact same response! So when you started out that they were sweet, I was really confused! I had to laugh at your experience with them.

At June 17, 2007 11:56 PM, Bill Lewis said...

Your comment concerning the confusion over mangos and green peppers brought back memories. I was born and raised in Marion and many people,when I was growing up, referred to green peppers as mangos. I left Marion and worked on the east coast for over thirty years. One of the first, of many, misconceptions I was corrected on was the definition of a green pepper and how it was completely different from a mango. I wonder how they became confused in the first place?

THE GRUB REPORT: Cooking the Books: A Book of Middle Eastern Food

2009-06-12T02:41:00.005-04:00

One of the most fascinating things about food, for me, is the fact that it's something we share with every single person on the globe, now and as far back as the history of humankind goes.

Think about it. The ingredients differ, and some of the techniques do too, but the aim is the same, and always has been: to provide nourishment and enjoyment. Just as I relish the opportunity to cook up something tasty, so do other young women on the opposite side of the globe. Is it any wonder that cooking utensils and preserved bits of food are some of the most telling finds in archaeological digs? We are, indeed, what we eat, and so goes the history of the world.

That may be why I find old cookbooks so intriguing.

As Jim Cramer mentioned in the comments of the last edition of Cooking the Books, there are real gems to be found beyond the shelves of the local book store or the virtual shelves of today's online retailers.

You can find them in boxes at auctions and garage sales, on shelves or bins at antique stores, used book stores or even junk stores, in piles at your friends' and family members' houses.
One of my favorites came from an interesting used book store down in Madison, Ind., called The Red Onion. If you're a book lover, be prepared to spend quite a long time if you ever decide to visit!

It's called A Book of Middle Eastern Food by Claudia Roden. (This first edition is now out of print, and apparently there is an updated version with a somewhat more modern take.)

Roden, in the book's introduction, says she hails from Cairo but moved to Europe as a girl. She recounts how food was her connection to her homeland. And can't we all relate to that? If you've ever traveled, or moved, or even seen the demise of a beloved hometown restaurant, the longing for the smells and tastes that are now out of reach can be the strongest manifestation of homesickness.

If you work that equation backward, though, you can transport yourself to parts of the globe you may never actually visit. Adding new flavors and techniques in your own kitchen can be just as eye-opening as an exotic vacation. And for that, this book is a treasure trove. The introduction gives the reader a glimpse into the culture of food in the Middle East, expanding your awareness beyond simple ingredients and dishes. It's as much an anthropology lesson as it is a cookbook!

Many of the recipes themselves, though, may be too much for the casual cook. The book assumes a mastery of technique and is by no means a step-by-step guide, as many modern cookbooks are. Modern cooks would likely have to do some of their own research, online or in other books, to be able to make good use of Roden's instruction. But that's not to say there is a lack of inspiration in the pages of this cookbook. The combinations of ingredients offer a whole new world of flavors that can help you revolutionize your own cooking, even if you don't follow Roden's recipes.

And that, to me, is one of the most exciting things about a book like this. It may not be the most used book on your shelves, but it will certainly color your culinary world.

So if you're dreaming of a trip to far-off lands, consider taking some new ideas for a spin in your kitchen instead. Head to a used book store or an antique store. Ask your family members if they have any unusual old books stashed somewhere. Then spend some time with your finds. Flip through the pages with no particular aim in mind. If you're looking for a specific dish, you'll miss a lot of the inspiration along the way.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on June 11, 2007 12:35 PM

Comments

At June 13, 2007 5:31 PM, James Cramer said...

Eating is not just about the cooking. If you are going to eat Middle Eastern cuisine go for the full experience and do it up right.

Kick off your shoes and eat sitting on the floor. Throw down and spread out some rugs and small pillows. Place the food on a low table in one large central dish for all to share. Put a bowl for washing your hands on or near the table so you can wash before and during eating.

Only eat from your place in the community bowl in front of you, no reaching across. Don't use forks, spoons, or knives. Use your hand to eat, however, only your right hand. It is bad manners to use your left hand. The right hand is exclusively used for all public functions. These include shaking hands, eating, drinking, and passing something to another person. Using the left hand is an insult. And remember that the soles of your feet should not point directly toward someone else. (This is also bad manners, and may bring "bad luck" to that person.)

Remember to make it fun. Here are some foods I suggest for you to enjoy.

Kibbeh - Lamb, beef and cracked wheat.

Samboosak - Beef patties

Lamb Shishlik - Marinaded skewered lamb ("Shish Kebob in in USA)

Al-Motubug - Pastry stuffed with beef

Mejadra - Lentils and rice or cracked wheat.

Tomato Salad

Tabouleh - cracked wheat, parsley and mint salad

Falafel - fried ground beans form the basis for a Middle East fast food.

Baba Ghannouche - Aubergine (Eggplant) salad with tehina

Humus bi Tehina - chick pea and sesame salad

Muhamara - hot pepper dip

Tahinat el Beid - dip for breadTurkish Salad - a hot sauce used with falafel

Adas Bil Hamod - Like Mejadra, but using potatoes

Salatat Bathinjan - aubergine (eggplant) salad

Labani - home made cheese made from yogurt and milkPita or other flat breads

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bites: Cooking with Rockstars

2009-06-12T02:39:00.004-04:00

Why is food and cooking such a popular topic of discussion? It's most likely the universality of eating. The list of experiences that all humans share is relatively short, and when you're limited to those appropriate for polite conversation, it's hard to beat a good gastronomic tit for tat.

Everyone eats and most everyone cooks to some degree, thus making food the great equalizer (sorry, Death). Sure, the most powerful person in the world might put his pants on one leg at a time, but finding out what he eats for breakfast seems a much more interesting way of making him human.

Jen Robbins understands this idea, and with her Web site, Cooking with Rockstars, she gives us a peek at the eating habits of our favorite pop idols.

In short video interviews, musicians discuss their prowess (or lack thereof) in the kitchen and even offer up recipes you can try at home. The eats range from silly (Jack Black's Dorito Burrito) to straightforward (Ben Kwelle's Grilled Chicken) to ripped straight outta mom's cookbook (Rufus Wainwright's Borscht recipe). While not always inspiring, the site is always interesting and serves to prove that even though you may not be able to party like one, you can certainly cook like a rock star.

Web site: Cooking with Rockstars

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on Jun 8, 07 10:25 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Curry Paste

2009-06-08T00:28:00.010-04:00

I know a lot of people have a hard time keeping up with the tech jargon that permeates our culture these days. You should have heard me explaining the concept of a blog to my mom. It was an experience akin to berry picking in the Kalahari: exhausting and fruitless.

There's no denying that the rapidly changing vocabulary of the Internet age can be daunting for those not immersed in it, but even the vernacular of the kitchen, which would seem to evolve at a lethargic snail's pace, can be infinitely confusing.

I became aware of this the other day while I was jotting down a shopping list in the break room at work. "What kinda list ya' making?" a co-worker asked. I explained that I was going to be making curry, to which she grimaced, explaining that she "wasn't a fan of Indian food."

Right then it dawned on me that "curry" is surely one of the most confounding words in the lexicon of cooking. To some, like my friend, it means a particular blend of spices (usually featuring coriander, cumin and turmeric) common in the cuisine of India. To others, "curry" is simply a synonym for "stew," or a sauce-based meat dish. In the U.K., "curry" can mean a spicy condiment served with French fries, proving, once again, that the Brits really know how to take a great thing and make it thoroughly unappetizing.

In its broadest usage, "curry" is used to refer to a wide range of spicy stews and as such has come to describe a variety of South East Asian dishes that are flavored with ingredients that are wholly different than their Indian counterparts.

Today's featured ingredient, curry paste, isn't so much a single ingredient, but is a recipe that can provide a spicy base for a number of variations on Thai Green Curry. While most Thai cooks include a number of exotic ingredients in their curry pastes (lemongrass, galangal, kaffir lime leaves, etc.) exact recipes differ from cook to cook and are based upon what is readily available. With this in mind, I offer up my own recipe for Thai Green Curry in which we replicate the exotic flavors of South East Asia with items available right here in town.

Green Curry Paste

Ingredients
1 Tbsp. ground coriander
1 Tbsp. ground cumin
Zest of 1 lemon
1/2 cup cilantro leaves
1 2-inch piece fresh ginger, grated
1 tsp. lime zest
6 garlic cloves; minced
2 shallots; chopped
12 green serrano peppers, finely chopped
1/4 cup water
1 tsp. black pepper
1 tsp. salt

Directions

Combine all ingredients in a food processor or blender and puree until it reaches a smooth paste consistency.

You'll most likely have enough paste for four to five recipes. In order to maximize the life of your paste, I recommend putting it into an airtight container or storage bag and keeping it in your freezer.

The following recipe for Green Chicken Curry is meant to be simple. Feel free to experiment with this one and find your own preferences (I like green peppers in mine). While it was prepared with our homemade curry paste, it is also great with the canned stuff. But you just don't get the crisp, fresh flavor you get with just about anything you make at home.

Basic Green Chicken Curry

Ingredients
1 can (14 oz) coconut milk
2 Tbsp. green curry paste
1 lb. chicken breast, cut into bite-size pieces
3 Tbsp. soy sauce
2 Tbsp. brown sugar
1 can (8 oz) bamboo shoots
1/2 cup frozen peas

Directions

Stir coconut milk and curry paste together in a large saucepan. Simmer over medium heat for five minutes.

Stir in the remaining ingredients and simmer for an additional 10 minutes. Serve over rice.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on June 7, 2007 10:00 PM

Comments
At June 8, 2007 10:52 PM, Nicole Noffsinger said...
Im not really big on Curry but I do love it on popcorn.

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bites: The Chic Podcast

2009-06-08T00:24:00.007-04:00

In the second edition of Friday Night Mega-Bites, I wanted to introduce our little community to a podcast that I've been listening to lately, but before we get into the details, I thought I should address a couple of the most pressing questions people often have about podcasts in general.

First off, podcasts are not just for iPod owners. In fact, you don't really need any type of standalone mp3 player to enjoy podcasts. A computer with a reliable Internet connection is really the only requirement. Simply download the podcast to your computer, and it's available to listen to any time you wish.

Secondly, while it's true that just about anyone can put out a podcast these days, you shouldn't assume all of them are made by layabouts with too much time on their hands. In fact, the world of food-casts is dominated by industry professionals with a true passion for food preparation and instruction. It's an outgrowth of their desire to share their knowledge, and we're lucky enough to be able to tap into it ... for free!

This week's featured Internet find is The Chic Podcast. Based out of Chicago, Chef Tom Beckman is a teacher by trade and presents a loose, entertaining discourse on everything edible. Alongside a revolving door of guests, he discusses culinary topics relevant to the kitchen novice and professional.

The show is in episode #75, so be sure to dig through back episodes to find a plethora of helpful food tips and more. I'm sure this will be a resource you'll revisit often for information and inspiration.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on June 1, 2007 11:05 PM

Comments
At June 3, 2007 11:28 PM, Bill Lewis said...
Steve Gibson, good idea. I'm currently overwhelmed by technology just trying to operate my PC. I think ipods will be my next great technological leap.

Since we are now officialy into summer I'd like to offer a few suggestions for the hot days ahead. Europe has had a tradition of serving chilled soup in the summer months. Two of the best know are French Vichyssoise (I'm aware of the debate over whether it was invented here or in France) and Spanish Gazpacho. Vichyssoise is a chilled potato and leek soup made with milk or cream. The net has several good recipes. My only suggestion is to use leeks vice scallions as some recipes recommend.

Let me digress for a moment. I have traveled to the Caribbean several times and my favorite place is Martinique. Martinique is an island in the French West Indies and is an excellent vacation choice. Martinique is considered a Department of France and they speak very little English on the island. That may be considered a "downside" for some American tourists who don't speak the language.

I stayed at the Le Meridien and had a very memorable lunch there one afternoon. They served a large bowl of Vichyssoise on a bed of crushed ice along with crusty French bread and a slice of Camembert. It was accompanied by a chilled glass of Montrachet. Absolutely sublime!

There are as many recipes for Gazpacho as there are Spanish cooks. It usually consists of cucumbers,garlic, red peppers (don't use yellow or green since it comes out a really strange color),seeded tomatoes/tomato juice, onions and olive oil all mixed together in a blender. It's a good idea to store at least overnight in the refrigerator. It's very refreshing served with French bread and a strong (Madeira?) wine.

I just thought I'd throw this into the "stock pot".

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the Week: Chickpeas

2009-06-08T00:15:00.008-04:00

When I was a wee lad, chickpeas seemed to confirm that old proverb, "Three's a crowd." In the barbecue side-item staple, Three Bean Salad, they always seemed foreign to me. Sure they had certain bean-like qualities, but something just seemed off. It could have been the slightly firm texture. I could have been the spheroid shape. Either way, I was not gonna let them take up valuable paper plate real estate.

It wasn't until I reached adulthood that I came to realize chickpeas were never meant to play third fiddle to other, more recognizable legumes. In fact, they are probably the most noble of all beans, able to stand on their own as the featured player in a variety of dishes spanning cuisines from nearly every continent.

Around our parts you can usually find chickpeas (sometimes called garbanzo beans or chana) in both canned and dry varieties. Deciding which one is better for you comes down to a question of time. While preparing dried chickpeas is not labor intensive, it does take a fair amount of planning. So, the allure of the canned variety is understandable. Luckily, canned chickpeas are perfectly serviceable in many recipes (including our Roasted Red Pepper Hummus recipe at the end of this post), but providing you have the time, go prepare the dried beans. Your meal will benefit for the little extra you put in.

Preparing Dried Chickpeas:

The USA Dry Pea and Lentil Council recommends soaking your chickpeas overnight and then simmering them for 1 1/2- 2 hours in twice as much water as the amount of dried chickpeas used.

Our recipe calls for 2 cups of chickpeas, so that’ll be 4 cups of water, but feel free to make as big of a batch as you like. Chickpeas can be frozen in the water in which they are boiled and kept for about two weeks.

Roasted Red Pepper Hummus

Ingredients:
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 cups prepared chickpeas (or one 15 ounce can)
1 1/2 tablespoons tahini (sesame paste)
1/2 cup roasted red peppers (find a great tutorial here)
2 tablespoons olive oil
juice from 1 lemon
1 tablespoon fresh parsley, chopped
1/4 teaspoon salt

Directions:
In a food processor, puree the chickpeas, garlic, tahini, red peppers, olive oil, lemon juice and salt. Be sure to scrape the sides of your processor to make sure the hummus is well blended and smooth.

Transfer your hummus to a bowl and refrigerate the mixture for at least one hour.

Sprinkle with parsley before serving.

This recipe is great with pita chips or naan.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on May 31, 2007 07:32 PM

Comments

At June 1, 2007 5:33 PM, Nicole Noffsinger said...

Anyone remember the Indian Resturant we had here in the old Marshall's video store on the bypass? They had the best Hummus! I remember not knowing what to try and my dad lathered a piece of bread with the stuff and omg it was great! I have never found any that rivaled the taste but it was awesome!

At June 3, 2007 1:15 PM, James Cramer said...

The funny thing is I always thought that the garbanzo beans were the best part of 3 or 4 bean salad. I grew up thinking that wax beans just weren't ripe yet and green beans should be over cooked, limp, and soggy.

However, I really liked the vinegar dressing, much as I prefer vinegar slaw to salad dressing slaw, so I ate it. I had no other reference for the garbanzo beans so I thought that bean salad was their only use. In college I ate hummus for years without realizing on what it was based.

Here is my suggestion for a very colorful summer salad that is quick and easy to throw together for last minute picnics. I love food with lots of different colors and now they say all the different flavonoids are good for you too.

Colorful Garbanzo Salad

Ingredients: Serves 6
2 15 to 16oz cans garbanzo beans, rinsed and well drained
1 large red bell pepper, diced 1/4-inch (if you double up the recipe, 1 red and 1 yellow)
1 3 to 4 oz can sliced ripe black olives, rinsed and well drained
1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro (2/3 cup if you really like it)
1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil
1/4 cup red wine vinegar
4 large hard boiled eggs, diced
1/2 tsp Kosher or Sea salt
1/4 tsp course ground black pepper

Directions:
In a large mixing bowl, combine garbanzo beans, bell pepper, black olives, green onions and cilantro. Mix in oil and vinegar, then gently toss in eggs. Season with salt and pepper to taste and serve at room temperature.

At June 4, 2007 9:00 AM, James Cramer said...

Sorry, In the ingredients list I forgot that you'll want 6 medium sized green onions washed. Cut into 1/4" pieces tops and all.

THE GRUB REPORT: Cooking the Books: The Best Recipes in the World

2009-06-08T00:10:00.010-04:00

Every Monday, we'll review a food-related book here on The Grub Report. It might be a cookbook. It might be an examination of the science of cooking. It might be a chef's memoir. Today's pick falls into the first category. So, without further ado, this week's edition of Cooking the Books:

If there is one cookbook that embodies the spirit of The Grub Report, it is Mark Bittman's The Best Recipes in the World.

From the Introduction: "Home cooking has never been easier, more exciting, or filled with as much potential. ... More information about the cooking of other lands is available than ever before, and the planet becomes smaller every year."

That's our stance, too. And it is amazing to take a minute and contemplate just how easy it has become. The local chain stores carry a wide array of ingredients that just a few years ago would have necessitated a trip to Indianapolis or even farther. The Internet has become a great resource for recipes and instructions for exotic dishes to satiate nearly any craving. And now, with just a few mouse clicks, you can watch cooks from around the world take you step by step through techniques that are foreign to most American cooks, showing you that it's not really as complicated as it seems. You don't even have to crack open a cook book anymore!

But you should, for one simple reason: Bittman, a journalist by training and a connoisseur by way of years and years of curiosity and exploration, has produced one of the most easy-to-use cooking references I've ever found.

The recipes are divided up in the traditional way, by course. But for each one, there are cross-references galore. Country or region of origin. Prep time. Variations. Even whether it can be made ahead or made in 30 minutes or less.

And that's not even taking into consideration the great index in the back. There are menus that bring complementary dishes together. There is the traditional alphabetical list of recipes, but with the prep notes (make ahead, etc.) as an added bonus. There is a list recipes broken down by cuisines / region. And then there is the traditional index, with ingredients and the recipes they're used in.

So let's say you want to spend a romantic evening eating as if you're in Paris. Just flip back to the section on France in the index of recipes by cuisine. So many choices. Perhaps you'll try the Salade Nicoise, the Steak au Poivre and the Genoise for dessert. Tres bien!

Or perhaps you know the flavor you're craving, and you want to build a meal around it. Maybe you're thinking garlic. But you're not in the mood for Italian. Head to the index. Your choices will range from the Yucatan to India to Louisiana and points in between.

Maybe, though, you picked up some of that chicken that was on sale at the market, not sure exactly what you were going to do with it. Sure, you could use the same old techniques you always do. And it would be fine. It would be home-cooked. And that's great. But if you checked out the index in this cookbook, you might well find a new favorite way to cook that common bird. There are almost two full pages of ideas just waiting to be tried.

Another big plus with Bittman's book is that he has taken pains to explain things in ways nearly any American cook will understand. Exotic recipes are available enough. But instead of leaving it to the home cook to do research simply to understand the ingredient list or instructions, Bittman brings it all together.

If you truly want to expand your culinary world, this could easily be your guidebook.
And did I mention it's on the shelf at the local library? It's call number at the Marion Public Library is 641.59 BIT. And as of Monday night, it was listed as checked in. Check it out!

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on May 28, 2007 10:01 PM

Comments

At May 29, 2007 10:45 PM, James Cramer said...

In case you want to buy the book the ISBN number is 9780767906722. The book lists for $29.95 but is available online for around $20.00.

Bittman's minimalist style of describing food preparation makes the book an easy read. However, his earlier book "How to Cook Everything" is better for those just beginning their journey into cooking and there are even better books for those with a desire for more exotic explorations. Overall I would give it a 6 out of 10.

At May 30, 2007 12:12 AM, Patricia Gibson said... James:

Would you mind passing on some suggestions? I'm always looking for new books to peruse.

At May 30, 2007 8:59 PM, James Cramer said... Tricia,

Call me Jim. James is just how I sign things and it gives me a quick clue when somebody calls the house if they really know me or not.

My suggested reading list would start with some oldies but goodies. "The New All Purpose Joy of Cooking", this is the revised edition of the classic; "The Encyclopedia of Creative Cooking"; "Easy Cooking For Today";
"Easy Cooking For Today, volume II"; "All Around The World Cookbook"; "Betty Crocker's New Cookbook, (Everything You Need to Know to Cook)"

I like looking at new cookbooks and sometimes buying one or two. However, I get my best stuff at auctions. I can get a bunch of old (new to me) cookbooks at one time with hand written notes and suggested substitutions. If I am lucky there are even some clippings and note cards stuck inside.

While I am making suggestions I think it would be nice if you and Steve wrote about some of the utensils of cooking.

Let me know if you want to borrow anything. I don't have a cup of sugar but I do have Splenda. (Since I am diabetic.)

THE GRUB REPORT: Friday Night Mega-Bites: Slashfood

2009-05-28T12:15:00.004-04:00

We're not even a week into our blogging experience and I'm already giddy about the awesome little gastro-centric community I see forming. I can't wait to sink my teeth into tantalizing recipes offered up, and my list of interesting ingredients to feature has nearly doubled. Bill Lewis is right. We could all use a little culinary diversity, and the best way to get that is by peeking at what others are doing in their kitchens. And with all these new friends, the possibilities are just about endless. Isn't technology great?

Speaking of food and the Internet, every Friday I'll be offering up a little food-related linkage for you to check out. It could be a blog or a podcast. It may range from the silly to the sublime. But it will always be offered up with the aim of perpetuating and expanding our culinary conversation.

This week's Friday Night Mega-Bite: Slashfood

Inspired by the tech news site Slashdot, Slashfood offers up a bevy of user-submitted links and articles focusing on food trends, recipes and news. The sheer volume of information available is astounding, and their bloggers really know their stuff.

One caveat: Be sure to set aside a bit of time to check out the site. Fifteen minutes can turn into two hours pretty quickly when you start clicking around on some of their more interesting posts. A quick perusal tonight turned up articles on maple bacon cupcakes, Donald Trump Steaks and horse meat hot dogs.

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on May 25, 2007 10:05 PM

THE GRUB REPORT: Ingredient of the week: Crab

2009-05-28T12:05:00.006-04:00

Once a week, The Grub Report will focus on an ingredient we think more people should add to their plates.

This week's ingredient isn't all that exotic, but it certainly can be intimidating. So we'll let you in on what we found locally and how it fared in a recipe that's sure to impress your friends: crab cakes.

Seafood is always a bit of a crapshoot in our neck of the woods.

When availability isn't the issue, the question of quality always seems to turn you back to the dependable arms of a certain rain-slicker clad fisherman.

Of course, what we aren’t comfortable making at home we often seek out at local restaurants, forgetting that they face the same limitations we do. Sure, it may be called the catch of the day, but exactly what day is often a mystery.

What frozen, pre-packaged seafood gains in shelf life, it pays for in taste. Restaurants and frozen food companies may try to preserve flavor (and cut costs) with hefty breading or fillers, but the final product will seldom satisfy those seeking the briny goodness that is real seafood.

Despite the dearth of fresh crabmeat in these landlocked parts, I decided to embark upon a quest to create the best crab cake I could with ingredients readily available to me at local groceries. Yes, this means canned crabmeat, but before we go any further, it is important to distinguish between the varities of meat available and the different processes by which they are pasteurized.

Buying crabmeat is a potentially mind-boggling affair. Presented with upwards of five different varieties, many people are stumped as to which the best is suited for cake-ification.

Food elitists will tell you that lump or jumbo lump crabmeat (usually the most expensive) is the only meat that should be considered. In reality, a perfectly decent crab cake can be made from the pink or white varieties, but in my opinion it's the claw meat that makes the most sense when making cakes from canned crabmeat. The dark meat from the claws has a stronger flavor that, even after processing, is sure to ring through in your final product.

Aside from the different meat varieties, a shopper also has to consider whether he or she wants to buy shelf-stable crabmeat or a variety that must be refrigerated.

Those squatty six-ounce cans that fit so nicely in your pantry contain crabmeat that has been pasteurized at high heat for a significant period of time. As you would probably guess, flavor loss in this process is significant, but then again you'd probably be able to bequeath your crab stash to your grandchildren in your will.

Refrigerated crabmeat, on the other hand, has also been pasteurized, but at a much lower heat and for a shorter period of time. The process is much kinder to the meat in terms of flavor, but the fridge-life is reduced to a comparatively paltry 18 months.

Having experimented with different varieties of crabmeat available locally, I have come to the conclusion that best choice for crab cakes is the refrigerated claw meat available at your local fish counter. The taste and texture of the cake prepared with this crabmeat was just so much more pronounced than the cakes made with shelf-stable varieties. Plus, as an added bonus, it was actually cheaper to buy two eight-ounce cans of refrigerated meat than four six-ounce cans (read carefully, that's four ounces of dry weight, baby!) of pantry meat.

Without further ado, our recipe:

Brilliantly Simple Crab Cakes

Ingredients:
1 lb. crabmeat (that's 16 ounces of dry weight, don't forget)
1 egg, beaten1 teaspoon
Worcestershire Sauce
1 1/2 teaspoon Old Bay (in the spice blends section at your grocery)
3 tablespoons crushed saltine crackers
2 tablespoons chopped cilantro
1/4 cup chopped green onion
1/4 cup mayonaise
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 cup flour
2 tablespoons vegetable oil

Directions:
Blend all ingredients except for crushed saltines, flour and oil in large bowl. Add crushed saltines until mixture is no longer wet and can hold together. (You may use less, you may use more, depending on your crab.)

Form into four cakes, cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for 30 minutes.

Heat oil in skillet over medium heat.

Put flour in a plate or shallow bowl and dredge cakes in it, lightly coating each side, then saute until cooked through and golden brown (approx. four minutes on each side).

Serve as is or on a split roll as a sandwich, with condiments of your choice.

Do you have a favorite recipe for crab cakes you want to share? Send it on in!

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Steve Gibson on May 23, 07 11:45 AM

Comments

At May 23, 2007 11:22 PM, James Cramer said...

It isn't a crab cake recipe but is my favorite use for canned crab meat.

Serves 4

Ingredients:
2 tbsp butter
1 chopped shallot
1/2 lb sliced fresh white mushrooms
1 tbsp chopped fresh parsley
2 tbsp flour
1 1/2 cups hot milk
4 oz well drained canned crab meat (I prefer white)
4 portions of cooked spiral pasta, hot
salt and pepper

Melt butter in a skillet over medium heat. Cook shallot, mushrooms, and parsley for 3 to 4 minutes.

Mix in flour throughly. Reduce heat to low and cook flour for 2 minutes.

Season with salt and pepper, pour in milk continue mixing and cooking for 8 to 10 minutes over low heat.

Add crab meat, mix well and adjust seasoning to taste. Cook 2 minutes over very low heat.

Spoon sauce over hot pasta and enjoy.

At May 23, 2007 11:26 PM, Patricia Gibson said...

Wow. That sounds really good! Can't wait to try it. I think we have some leftover crab ...

At May 24, 2007 10:10 AM, Angie said...

Living in a landlocked state but loving seafood, I tried a recipe a few years ago that had promise.

"Connie's Zucchini Crab Cakes" is posted at http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Connies-Zucchini-Crab-Cakes/Detail.aspx, and if you have zucchini from an area garden later in the summer, this is an enjoyable recipe to use. It utilizes 2 1/2 cups of shredded zucchini, drained well, and Old Bay seasoning. Because the recipe is published online elsehwere, I will not post the entire thing here, but I suggest you visit www.allrecipes.com and see this recipe and the 300+ helpful reviews.

I enjoyed it, and I can almost imagine it is related somehow to crab... my husband found that this was an okay way to use zucchini, but my crab illusion wouldn't hold.

So this is our land-locked version of pretend crab cakes, for what it's worth. :)

At May 24, 2007 8:51 PM, Nicole Noffsinger said...

Anyone have a specific brand that is better to use for crab cakes and other recipies that we have around here?

At May 24, 2007 9:51 PM, Steve Gibson said...

When I was comparing the shelf stable crab meat to the refrigerated I used Bumblebee (shelf stable) and Phillips (refrigerated). While the Bumblebee cakes were very good, the ones made with Phillips were just outta sight. I bought the Phillips clawmeat at Marsh and know that they usually have it in stock at the seafood counter. They also carry the lump crab meat, but have not seen it for a while.

At May 25, 2007 8:34 PM, Susan said...

The crab cakes look simply delicious! I was wondering, what if you're having an event and make the crabcakes but you also want to make sure you cater to those who may have a shellfish allergy? Any easy substitutions to make sure everyone has an enjoyable dinner?
Thanks!

At May 25, 2007 10:21 PM, Steve Gibson said...

Susan, it's funny that you'd ask that. Worried that not everyone would be willing to jump aboard my crab cake bandwagon, I bought some gound turkey "just in case." With no real plan ahead of time, I just took the basic crab cake recipe (minus the Old Bay, mayo and flour) and made little turkey burgers. They were actually quite tasty and received rave reviews.

At May 25, 2007 10:33 PM, Steve Gibson said...

Angie, sounds like a great way to deal with that annual deluge of zucchini. I mean, how much zucchini bread can one man eat? Plus, it's just cool when you dress one food up like another. I was thinking that I should do a whole week's worth of faux foods. Zucchini Crab Cakes, Mock Apple Pie and... I dunno, Tofurkey?

At May 27, 2007 4:55 PM, Angie said...

Commenting on the faux crab... my brother and another family friend have shellfish allergies, but I've been able to use what we call "fake crab" (imitation crab meat) in recipes. I have a crab quiche in which I use this... it's made from Alaskan white fish, I do believe. This is good in pasta salads, also. (My husband generally prefers this to zucchini! :)

THE GRUB REPORT: Hungry for change

2009-03-29T13:59:00.010-04:00

This ain't your mama's kitchen.

Sure, those yellowed recipe cards handed down generation to generation are precious. But when's the last time you made grandma's Prize Prune Pie?

Being tied down by the eating habits of our forefathers is, like, so last millennium. There's a whole wide world out there, and we've got it right at our fingertips. So prepare yourself to step out of your culinary comfort zone and consider ideas and ingredients that, quite frankly, might scare you just a little bit.

Together, we'll mine the depths of the World Wide Web, seeking out unfamiliar foods and the know-how to put them to good use.

We’ll seek out and demystify some of the "exotic" items available at local stores. You know. The ones you look at, maybe even pick up, and think, "What am I supposed to do with this?" And we'll explore how unfamiliar ingredients or techniques can fit right into your own repertoire.

You deserve more than the same old same-old staring back at you meal after meal. And it doesn't take a course at Le Cordon Bleu culinary school to break the cycle. The facts and the foods are out there, waiting to fill our minds and our mouths.

We're not professionals. Just hungry. How about you?

Originally posted to The Grub Report by Patricia Gibson on May 21, 2007 06:34 PM

Comments
At May 22, 2007 6:04 PM, Adam Wire said...
The most underrated aspect is experimentation. All you need is a spice rack and whatever meat or vegetable you plan to cook. Add an ingredient to grandma's old recipe, or eliminate one. I do it to my Mom's old recipes all the time (don't tell her that, though). Just don't overload a particular spice or marinade.

(Geez, now I'm even more hungry!)

At May 22, 2007 9:01 PM, James Cramer said...
Bless you! Diversity of food is one of my passions. The tried and true may be comforting but is rarely exciting. However, do not hastily discount your great, great, great grandma's old, yellowed, stained, and smeared note cards. I have found that some of the most amazing flavors and textures I have experienced may not be in current vogue but were at one time main dinning fare.

Prune Pie you say and it won a prize. Can't wait to try it. After turning up my nose at prunes for most of my life as nothing more than a "natural" cure for constipation I have discovered that I like dried plums as a snack and prune danish is delightful. I can't wait to discuss the uses for jicama, leeks, dandelion greens, chick peas, pawpaws, mayhaws, chow-chow, muscadine, ugly fruit, fiddle heads, palm hearts, buffalo, ostridge, escargot, and many, many other both local and foreign "exotic" taste treats.

Greatly looking forward to some "omg" moments both in pleasure and disgust. But, it should be exciting!!

At May 22, 2007 9:18 PM, Bill Lewis said...
Tricia Gibson, I believe this is the type of Blog that is truly needed in Marion/GC. It appears that the majority of the population is addicted to fast food burgers and fries and could use a little culinary diversity. Maybe experimenting with something other than Cheez Whiz and white bread. A sincere bonne chance!

At May 24, 2007 9:02 PM, Nicole Noffsinger said...
I am a little different. I don't have that many grandma's recipes. So everything I make I either find in other people's recipe collections or I have to guess and test! Im not big on Jicama, but I think leeks added to roasts, soups, and stews taste way better than most onions. I had escargot in high school during Foreign Foods day in French class.... my family would stage a seige and send me to time out if I made that. I wonder why don't we have those cooking competitions like we used to have around here? I can remember the tv guide looking booklets that would come in the paper with all the winner's recipies in them. What a great attraction and event it would be to start that up again! Atleast it would take some thought off all the financial woes and gas prices.

At May 25, 2007 10:51 AM, Susan Adams said...
I look forward to reading more about your successful kitchen experimentations.

I am not much of a fast food eater, but I do realize my cooking ideas seem to use the same ingredients every time....HELP!

For the record, I blame my lack of culinary creativity to my high school home economics course where we spent our entire cooking portion of the class learning to make lollipops.....

Don't Go Into the Woods - Now Available for Download!

2008-07-03T20:58:00.005-04:00

The wait is finally over!

That's right. You can finally own your very own copy of DGITW!

For those not in the know, it's the twenty minute horror epic from writers/stars Jacob and Michael Guess. It tells the story of a group of youngsters venturing into the woods in search of evidence proving a local legend may have actually existed. Soon they have all of the proof they'll ever need as old Mrs. Gregory begins picking them off one by one.

The boys along with the rest of the cast and crew worked hard to put this thing together. And I think that they did a terriffic job.

The movie is in .mp4 format which is watchable on your computer OR your ipod! So, if you have the capability, sync it up and share it with your friends and family!

To download the movie, click here.

Also, keep your eyes here on the homepage, because over the next few days I'm gonna be featuring different selections from the DVD's special features.

As a teaser, you can follow this link to check out our flickr photostream which is currently displaying an international poster gallery featuring the wide variety of promotional art that went out to theaters across the globe.

Movie Night: Jack Brooks - Monster Slayer

2008-04-14T20:08:00.003-04:00

It's been a while, but we're coming back hard again. This time 'round, my nephew Jacob takes over the reins for a one-minute review of the upcoming film Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer.

Movie Night: Cloverfield

2008-01-23T16:18:00.001-05:00

Last Saturday Tricia and I made it out to see Cloverfield. Below is a two minute review.

New DVD Releases: Jan. 22, 2008

2008-01-22T15:54:00.000-05:00

It's Tuesday and that can only mean one thing: new DVD releases!

We wanted to start highlighting a few of the significant releases each week and with the generous support of our new sponsor we are able to get things started with five picks for the week of Jan. 22nd.

Diary of the Dead Trailer Hits!!!

2008-01-15T21:41:00.000-05:00

Saw this online and it got me pretty excited. George A.'s latest seems to be a kind of "reboot" for the living dead mythos. The early word is that it's his best work since the original trilogy. Can't wait!

Diary of the Dead - Exclusive Trailer

Add to My Profile More Videos

An original horror film contest, huh? Just may have to break out the ole' video camera and mix up a couple of gallons of karo-blood!

Ah... So Delectable!

2008-01-08T15:31:00.000-05:00

Check out this trailer for a Spanish language Ratatouille rip off called Ratatoing. In a word... "ratatarded."

It reminds me of one of the better things to come outta SNL in recent years: White Possum Scream.

Get Real!

2008-01-07T19:44:00.000-05:00

Tricia got me an iPod Nano for Christmas and one of the first things I did was convert David Lynch's Inland Empire and load it up so I could slog through the 3+ hour movie at my leisure.
Oops...

2007: The Year in Movies (According to Steve)

2007-12-31T22:05:00.000-05:00

Top five movies of 2007:

5. Hatchet
This movie probably ranks higher on my list than it should, but my experience seeing it screened at the November Horror Hound convention was far and away the most fun I've ever had seeing a horror film. Sure it's sophomoric and silly, but it also throws down the gauntlet to all other genre fans and film makers out there. Let's forget about all of the remakes and J-Horror inspired dreck and let's get back to what made us fans in the first place: bloody, irreverent fun!

4. No Country for Old Men
I'm always pretty psyched for a new offering from the Cohens, but I have to admit that this one left me a bit baffled watching the closing credits. I was so mesmerized by Josh Brolin's and Javier Bardem's performances that I never realized it wasn't even their film. Definitely an awesome movie, but one that requires a good deal of discourse over dinner afterwards.

3. 30 Days of Night
The shaky-cam sequences got a bit tiresome, but this movie hit everything else squarely on the head! The typically irksome Josh Hartnett turns in a performance that is actually decent, and the story is as engrossingly ruthless as it is novel. Get ready for the glut of vampire-centric horror films and meet me in 2009 when we'll all complain that none of them were nearly as good as 30 Days of Night.

2. Eastern Promises
Cronenberg has an affinity for stories dealing with infection and disease. Most often it's a literal breakdown of the human form, but in his latest couple of films he's been focusing more upon the metaphorical infection caused by deception within relationships. In A History of Violence we see Viggo Mortensen playing the role of a bad guy posing as a good guy. In Eastern Promises we get Mortensen playing the reversal of that role as an undercover agent infiltrating the Russian mafia. It is, hands down, the best performance of the year in a film that too few people got out to see. Sure it was marketed as an "edge of your seat," thriller type of movie, but it also has the best action I've seen in years. Amazing stuff that everyone needs to check out.

1. Grindhouse
Are you really surprised? I've said it before, and I'll say it again. It's a movie that was made for people like me. I revel in classic exploitation cinema, and the idea of bringing that primal attitude toward entertainment into the multiplexes makes me giddy. Don't get me wrong, this stuff isn't Bergman. But that's the point. It's visual storytelling boiled down to its essence. It's all bang and zero pretense. It's cinema as a communal thrill ride, something that you don't get to experience at theaters today... ever... and that's sad.

Five also worth noting:

Black Snake Moan (In a year infatuated with recreating 1970s sleaze cinema, Craig Brewer serves up a slice of the real deal. Forget Pulp Fiction; Black Snake Moan is Samuel L.'s tour de force.)

The Simpsons Movie (There were lots of complaints about this being little more than an hour-long version of the television series. To this I say, "What did you expect?" For umpteen years The Simpsons has been one of a very few consistently great shows on the tube, and the movie is a suiting complement to that legacy.)

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (Yes, it was straight to video. Yes, some of the acting is sub-par. But this low-budget indie (I would guess that licensing the Talking Heads for the closing credits cost more than the whole film) does the whole "post-modern horror" thing better than the big studio offerings.)

300 (Far and away not my favorite film of the year, but still a groundbreaking piece of work. Each individual frame could stand on it's own as a captivating piece of art .)

Hot Fuzz (Didn't dig Shaun of the Dead as much as others, but I'll have to go back and give it another chance after enjoying this one as much as I did. It's a bit sad that the Brits are better at spoofing American genre films than we are.)

Five biggest disappointments:

Halloween (I never really viewed the original as the untouchable genre masterpiece that many others do, but even I felt violated after watching this steaming log fester on screen for an hour and a half. Shame on you, Robert Zombie.)

Spider-man 3 (So much has been said about this train wreck already that it seems like a waste of breath to spell out the list of offenses committed by Raimi and Co. on this outing. Suffice it to say that the third installment was overstuffed... with extra cheese.)

Beowulf (Crispin Glover was excellent as Grendel, but that's pretty much the end of the compliments I can extend to this film. In its best scenes the CG characters were a nifty gimmick. In its worst, they looked like characters that weren't good enough to make it into Shrek the Third.)

Mr. Bean's Holiday (Every year there's one movie that I'm ashamed to admit that I went to see. This year that honor goes to Mr. Bean's Holiday. I don't know what it is that made the original television series so funny, but in two attempts they have yet to translate it to the big screen. )

Ghostrider (I would have preferred a big screen adaptation of Ghostwriter to this abysmal chunk of crap.)

Top five I wanted to watch, but didn't ... yet:

The Mist (Wasn't really interested in seeing this one until I heard everyone talking about "the ending." Now it's killing me, and I have to wait until it's released on DVD.)

Joe Strummer: The Future is Unwritten (A doc about the former Clash frontman would have piqued my interest on its own, but the fact that it was directed by the same guy who brought us The Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle and The Filth and the Fury makes me ashamed for not tracking this one down while it was in theaters.)

I'm Not There. (I'm not one of those guys that goes nuts for Bob Dylan, but the idea of six actors (including Cate Blanchett) playing Dylan at various points in his career is interesting.)

Redacted (Brian De Palma revisits the themes laid out in his 1989 film Casualties of War within the context of the current war in Iraq. It's a rare opportunity to watch a legendary filmmaker meditate on the inhumanities of war at two different points in his life)

Five most anticpated in 2008:

Cloverfield (Regardless of how good the film actually is, this one is already a testament to the power of viral marketing. Only the man behind Lost could promise us absolutely nothing and have everybody ready to queue up for a ticket.)

Be Kind, Rewind (Contemporary blockbusters remade with Michel Gondry's craft corner aesthetic? A pack of wild (hand-crafted, patch-work) horses couldn't keep me away.)

Diary of the Dead (George A. Romero goes back to making movies on his own terms, and the early word is that the result is some of his best work in recent years.)

Choke (The first Chuck Palahniuk novel to be given the movie treatment since Fight Club. Hopefully if this one is half as good as Fight Club we'll get Invisible Monsters too!)

The Incredible Hulk (Yeah, I know. The prospect of a complete series reboot after one film is a bit unsettling, but the Hulk is just too good of a character to not get a second chance. Plus, have you seen the cast list? Tim Blake Nelson, William Hurt, Tim Roth, Liv Tyler and Edward Norton as Bruce Banner!?!? I've got high hopes for this one.)

Mmmmm...

Just thinkin' about it makes me want some chocolate milk real bad.

2007: The Year in Movies (According to Tricia)

2007-12-30T23:23:00.000-05:00

Top five movies of 2007:

5. 300
Groundbreaking filmaking techniques alone make this film worth its place on the list. But I thoroughly enjoyed the story, the aesthetic, the actors too. I've been intrigued with Greek and Roman history and mythology since my days on the quiz bowl team in middle school. And Gerard Butler pulls off an amazing transformation into the inspiring and awe-inspiring Spartan king, Leonidas. The trend of turning graphic novels into films continues to be a successful one.

4. 30 Days of Night
This movie does for vampires what 28 Days Later did for zombies. It makes them scary again. Not sexy. Not charming. Darn scary. Josh Harnett is surprisingly good as the hero. And this indie movie's old-style ways of implying supernatural action, rather than trying to show everything via CGI, shows up the year's other big vampire flick, I Am Legend (see biggest disappointments section).

3. Grindhouse
Robert Rodriguez' Planet Terror beats the pants off Quentin Tarrantino's Death Proof in my book. But it was all fun to watch, and these two deserve huge amounts of credit for bankrolling their own visions and thumbing their noses at the establishment.

2. Eastern Promises
David Cronenberg has a unique view of the world. Some of his movies work for me, some don't, but all of them make you think. This one works to a fabulous degree, and Viggo Mortensen is awesome. You think you know mafia movies? Think again.

1. No Country for Old Men
This is, in my opinion, the Cohen brothers' best film to date. It's dark, existential, powerful and sad. And it reminds you that there are brutal, unstoppable forces in this world that you just have to pray never cross your path. "You can't stop what's coming," the main character (played suprisingly poignantly by Tommy Lee Jones) is told. To think you can, his brother says, is "vanity." So you have to find your own path based not on a misguided sense of duty but on what's the right path for you and those you love. And every time you make a decision, you have a chance to change that path.

Five also worth noting:

Zodiac (An interesting look at investigative journalism, newsrooms in the 1970s, and one of the great American unsolved mysteries.)

Sweeney Todd (Tim Burton + Johnny Depp = worth watching nearly every time.)

Amazing Grace (A story you probably don't know but should.)

The Namesake (From the director of Monsoon Wedding and Vanity Fair, Mira Nair. A great study of family, culture and personal identitiy.)

Broken English (Directed by Zoe Cassavetes, starring Parker Posey and Drea de Matteo. Another great study of finding one's own personal identity.)

Five biggest disappointments:

Ghostrider (I like comic book movies, and I had high hopes for this one. Nicholas Cage, Eva Mendez and bad CGI crushed those hopes.)

Beowulf (It's one of the ultimate classic stories. It's the very definition of epic. So why did the movie fall so flat? And why didn't they better utilize the 3-D technology?)

Vacancy (When the movie ended, I couldn't believe that was all there was. Ugh.)

I am Legend (Overall, I enjoyed watching this movie. But afterward, when I got to thinking about all the things that didn't work, my disappointment just kept growing. Note to filmakers Artfully implied action is better than cheesy CGI. But implied story lines that never amount to anything are confusing at best. I do have to say, though, that the Fresh Prince has come along way.)

28 Weeks Later (I loved 28 Days Later. Had this sequel not had that to live up to, I might have enjoyed it more. But it did, and I didn't. Maybe we should have left well enough alone.)

Top five I wanted to watch, but didn't ... yet:

Ratatouille (It's about a cute rat that cooks. And it stars Patton Oswalt as the voice of that rat. What's not to like?)

3:10 to Yuma (I love Christian Bale. Not so much Russell Crowe. But this movie intrigues me.)

Hot Fuzz (I'm a sucker for British comedy.)

The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (I'm a sucker for history.)

Joe Strummer: The Future is Unwritten (A look at the life of the former frontman of The Clash, one of the most influential punk bands, who died just as he was restarting a career as a singer with something to say, unlike too many of them.)

Five most anticpated in 2008:

Dark Night (I loved Batman Begins. I love Christian Bale. And Heath Ledger's Joker looks creepy and awesome!)

There Will Be Blood (Supposed to come out this year in limited release. Daniel Day Lewis in another twisted anti-father-figure role, from the looks of it.)

Vantage Point (The trailer twists my stomach in knots. I hope the movie can live up to it.)

Be Kind Rewind (Michel Gondry. Jack Black. Let the wacky fun begin!)

Burn After Reading (Next up from the Cohen brothers -- woo-hoo!)

(Long Overdue) Horror Hound Wrap-Up!

2007-12-04T19:52:00.000-05:00

We're quickly approaching the month mark as far as waiting for a recap of the experience that was Horror Hound Weekend V.2.0, so I figured that I had better get it up before I lost all recollection of what exactly went down.

The first time around (in July) we only went the first day, but had such a great time that I sprung for the entire weekend. I dropped some serious coin, but when all is said and done, I have to admit that it was completely worth it! Here's a day by day breakdown of our weekend:

Friday (Day #1)

We arrived in Indy and made it to the showroom as quickly as we could. First on our list was to meet was Roddy Piper. I was never a huge wrestling fan, but the movie They Live is one of my favorites of all time. So, I wanted to be sure and get a chance to meet Piper. As a coincidence, Piper was scheduled to be in Marion on the following Saturday, so I was excited to actually have something to ask him about. When I got up to his table I shook his hand and asked him about appearing in Marion... and he was completely stumped. He had no clue what the hell I was talking about. It was pretty awkward. He signed my still, we shared a little small talk and I was on my way.

Not the best start to the experience. Quite frankly I felt a little bit dirty afterward. You'll notice that didn't post a pic of me with Piper. That was because he was charging $25 for a picture with him. $25! And the fact that his handler had to whisper how to spell my name in his ear was a little weird as well. I mean, my name is "Steve." Not exactly a Bumper Stumper, folks.

I chalked Piper's ignorance of his much hyped local appearance at the EWF Arena to Marion's perpetual bad luck with announcing big events and then later finding out that they were never gonna happen in the first place... but then, after the fact, I found out that he did come to Marion! The very next day! Not 24 hours after the man expresses complete ignorance of Marion, IN and the EWF, he shows up talking about how important it is to show support for these young wrestling organizations. I dunno. It just rings a bit hollow to me. A pretty disillusioning experience. You can read the C-T article about the Marion appearance over here. Or, even worse, you can chek out the shocking, straight from the horses mouth 4-1-1 on the Marion appearance, here. Yikes!

As we were waiting to meet Piper, I was a little saddened to see David Naughton sitting all alone at his table. So as soon as we finished with the Piper debacle we went over to meet him. He was super nice and signed my American Werewolf in London one-sheet. I pointed out to him that Jacob was wearing his Dr. Pepper shirt in honor of meeting him and he offered to sign that for him as well. A pretty great guy!

Afterward, we decided to roam the floor a bit and do a little shopping. I stopped by the Synapse Films booth and picked up a copy of Thriller: They Call Her One Eye autographed by Christina Lindberg. Of course, she was originally supposed to be at the convention, but cancelled late in the game due to medical problems. I was bummed that I was not gonna be able to get my pressbook signed, but it's nice to have the DVD. Oh yeah... I got a t-shirt as well.

Next, Michael decided that he wanted to get Michael Berryman's autograph. He was pretty hard to miss in the show room and not just because of his appearance. He was all over the place chatting up fans and vendors. We stepped up, Michael picked out a picture for him to autograph and he just started talking to the boys and I like we were long lost friends. Really he was a super nice guy. He asked the boys if they had skipped school (which they had) and even asked them if they'd like to get a picture! After I had snapped their shot, I shook his hand and said "Thank you." and he asked if I would like a picture too! I can't say enough good things about this guy. Too cool!

After that, we took all of our loot back to the room and got ready for the first film we had planned on seeing for the weekend. I had been wanting to see Hatchet since its initial release, but as soon as I heard that they'ed be screening an uncut version at Horror Hound I ceased all attempts to see it beforehand. I have to say that I'm glad I did. Seeing this film with so many horror fans and two of its stars in attendance was just unreal. It was a pretty great movie, but being free to cheer and clap for all of the gory violence made it all the better. The DVD comes out on the Dec. 18th and I suggest that everyone goes out and rents... no, buys it!

That was it for day #1. We retired to our rooms knowing that we were gonna be gettin' up at the buttcrack of dawn the next day.

Saturday (Day #2)

With a wake-up call from my mom, we got up at 6:00 am and went down to wait in line to get tickets to meet John Landis. Let me say that again... we waited in line to get tickets that guaranteed us the chance to meet him. The line to actually meet him would c ome later in the day. But first thing in the morning, we waited from approximately 7:00 am until 10:00 to get the tickets.

The time actually went pretty quickly. I met a guy from Fort Wayne and we talked up some serious horror nerd minuiae for a solid three hours. Not something that I get to do everyday... or ever... so that was fun. After getting our tickets we returned to the room to wait until 12:00 when we could go down and wait in another line to actually meet John Landis.

When we got down to the showroom, the line was HUGE. No joke, even though we were like sixth or seventh in line to get tickets, we were like the 250th person in the line to meet him. We waited an additional three and a half hours to meet him, but it was completely worth it. He signed my American Werewolf in London one-sheet, a convention poster and even warned Michael of the impending horrors awaiting him in adolescence. Too funny! Then as we were getting our pic snapped, he yanked Jake over into the shot too! Take a close look. He's got a death grip on Jake's arm. This was far and away the highlight of the convention!

We had a little bit of time before lunch, so we figured it was a good time for Jacob to get Shawnee Smith's autograph. Her line was pretty long, but Michael and I waited with Jake so that we could snap a pic when he got up to her. A few minutes into our wait, we noticed Sammy Terry coming into the show room. Michael and I had missed him the day before and knew that we had to get in line right then if we had any intention of meeting him. So we split away from Jacob with instructions that he was supposed to call when he was getting close to the front of the line. Well, we hit the front of Sammy's line at the exact same moment Jacob was meeting Shawnee Smith. So, sadly, we didn't get a pic of Jake with her. I did, however get a picture with the legend of local horror programming, Sammy Terry!

Next we went out to meet Tricia, her mom and sister for lunch. We went to Bazbeaux Pizza, and I only mention this because if you've never been there you need to go. Seriously some tof the best gourmet-type pizza around. Check it out.

When we got back, we were a little bit late for the next film we were planning on checking out, but just outta pure luck we made it just in time to catch a little bit of the panel discussion for Beware the Moon with Paul Davis, John Landis and David Naughton. It was fun to hear Landis talking about the film and answering fans' questions.

After the panel, we stuck around to check out The Zombie Diaries which we probably shouldn't have done. It was pretty much a steaming log. When you've created a zombie movie that can't even hold the attention of middle school boys... you are indeed a failure.

Sunday (Day #3)

Our last day at the Con was primarally a shopping day. I picked up a couple of DVDs and the boys bought some things too. I bought a copy of Tom Savini's Grande Illusions which I had wanted since I was Jacob and Michael's age. He signed it and posed for a quick pic with Michael. Also, we stopped by to meet Kane Hodder and Tony Todd who both had major roles in Hatchet. Tony Todd assured us that he'd be back for Hatchet Part II. I can't wait.

On the way home we stopped at the Imax to check out Beowulf in 3D. It was pretty but didn't really come close to living up to the advance hype I'd read. Honestly, if the film hadn't been in Imax and in 3D, I probably wouldn't have liked it at all. That being said, though, Crispin Glover was pretty amazing as Grendel!

Anyway, that's the story of our weekend. It was a blast and we can't wait until the next one in March. They've already announced a few names and it looks like there's gonna be a Hellraiser, Texas Chainsaw Massacre Part 2 and Return of the Living Dead reunion. Pretty amazing stuff. I better start saving my pennies now!

Horror Hound Countdown Day... Oh... Who Cares?

2007-11-07T22:53:00.000-05:00

Crap! I saw the following announcement on the Horror Hound Weekend forums today:

We are saddened to announce that due to a recently-diagnosed medical situation, Christina Lindberg has been forced to cancel out of this November's HorrorHound Weekend event. Christina will be undergoing immediate surgery next week and we at HorrorHound, and Synapse Films, wish Christina the best and pray for a healthy and speedy recovery.

In the midst of this diagnosis - Christina feels very sorry to all her fans whom have planned trips to the Indianapolis area to meet her, obtain autographs, witness a rare Q&A, etc... and despite her personal trauma - she has somehow assured that anyone coming to this convention event will still have a chance to walk away from the show with something special. Her manager, Rickard Gramfors, will be flying in from Sweden with a package of special autographed pictures, DVDs and other items that will be available for purchase at the Synapse booth.

A screening of They Call Her One Eye will still occur, to be followed by a special career presentation on Christina, as well as a presentation of the "Origins of Swedish Sin" from Rickard, who is also a film researcher, collector and expert on Swedish exploitation cinema.

Christina promises to try and attend a HorrorHound Weekend event in the future to hopefully meet with all the fans who will sadly miss out on this highly-anticipated appearance.More importantly, we urge fans to bring get well cards and well wishes to the Synapse booth, which will be brought back to Christina as she recovers.

Nathan Hanneman

HorrorHound Magazine

Gerald Chandler

Synapse Films

I am beyond sad by this news. This was like a once and a lifetime deal. She doesn't do conventions and I was completely psyched to have her sign my One Eye pressbook. Don't get me wrong. We'll still have a good time, but this is a HUGE blow to my enthusiasm for this one. Christina Lindberg was the one person that I really wanted to see, but alas it was not meant to be.

sniff..sniff...

Horror Hound Countdown Day #8

2007-11-04T22:21:00.000-05:00

Well, there was a brief scare that Roddy Piper was gonna pull out of the show, but that was averted. Sadly, two other celebs that I was really looking forward to seeing HAVE decided to pull out. Stephen Geoffreys and Sybil Danning will not be attending the show and I am completely bummed.

If you remember back during the Teen Sex Comedy marathon, I sang Geoffreys praises in Faternity Vacation and told of his later career in the gay porn industry. Of course before he went down that dark and hairy path, he appeared in two pretty major horror vehicles (Fright Night and 976-Evil) both of which I am a pretty big fan of.

Sybil Danning I remember most for Reform School Girls, but she also had a leading role in the schlockfest, Howling II: Your Sister is a Wolf. She's kinda a trash film icon and I was really looking forward to meeting her.

This really puts a damper on the little movie countdown I have going. Fright Night was up next and 976-Evil and Reform School Girls were also on my list. Also gone from the guest list (although I'm not mourning it too hard) is Matt Helms, the wild boy from Cabin Fever. Of course, this was another movie on my list for the countdown... which is getting shorter... and shorter...

Here's hoping that we've seen the last of the celebs jumping ship.

Horror Hound Countdown Day #7

2007-11-03T16:26:00.003-04:00

Midnight Madness

(1981)

When we featured Summer School, I mentioned how it was a non-horror movie with connections to the convention and with Midnight Madness we have a similar situation. While there is absolutely no horror content in the film, it does star American Werewolf in London's David Naughton (an attendee at the November convention) in his first feature film role. While it certainly is dated, it is still good fun and a movie that I remember fondly from my younger days.

I've talked a lot about the old days back when our family used to have one of those illegal converter boxes that piped HBO into our house for free. It seemed like back then there were certain movies that HBO played constantly and this was definitely one of them. Despite it's everpresence, my sister and I watched it just about every time it was on and before we knew it the word "fagabeefe" had entered our lexicon for good.

The story is about five or six teams of college kids playing a scavenger hunt type of game that takes them all over the city, solving clues to figure out the final destination and get there first. The mastermind of the game, Leon, runs the game from his nerdly lair and follows the teams' progress through each of his elaborately set-up "missions" to attain clues. Oddly enough, Joe Belfiore, inspired by this movie, created a similar type of game while he was at Stanford which eventually inspired the movie "The Game." Weird, huh?

Anyway, the plot is as simple as can be. Each of the teams represent a different cliched college subgroup. You've got the nerds (led by Eddie Deezen!), the meatheads, the girls, but most importantly you've got the good guys (led by Naughton, of course) and the bad guys (led by Stephen Furst at his shlubbiest). It plays out exactly as you'd expect, but it's still fun to watch as, one by one, the teams fall victim to their own quirks and fall behind in the race. Of course the end is a free-for-all scramble to the final destination ending with... well, you know.

Notice the DVD cover. It's pretty bad when your big names are David Naughton and Eddie Deezen! But you've gotta give Disney props for not featuring Michael J. Fox's name above the title (although his picture is pretty prominent). What? I didn't mention the Disney or the Fox? Yeah, this movie was stealthily released by Disney as their second ever PG rated feature (Black Hole was the first) and it is also the feature film debut of Michael J. Fox (billed here simply as Michael Fox). Honestly, it's pretty amazing how much effect this film has had on popular culture, yet still it remains relatively obscure.

Video Goodness!

Midnight Madness - Mr. Carson's Obese Male Child

Midnight Madness - 8,800 Keys

Midnight Madness - Meat Machine!

Midnight Madness - Mrs. Grimhaus

Midnight Madness - FAGA BEEFE!

Horror Hound Countdown Day #6

2007-11-02T19:26:00.000-04:00

Night of the Living Dead
(1990)

Make no mistake, the original Night of the Living Dead (released in 1968) is my favorite movie of all time. And given my general stance of horror remakes, it probably comes as a shock that this is one that I actually like pretty well. I'm sure that it has something to do with the fact that a lot of the people behind the original had their hands in making this update. As the original film has fallen into the public domain, it's nice that we have the opportunity to support the creators of the seminal classic... the fact that it is a pretty decent movie in its own right? Well, that's just icing.

News of the NOTLD remake came at a pivotal time in my first wave of horror fandom. When news came down that the king of splatter, Tom Savini was gonna make his debut as a feature film director on this one... well, that practically sent me into convulsions. I followed the production closely. I HAD to see this movie. And when it finally dropped, it was one of the first major "film events" of my life.

Needless to say, there's a lot of nostalgia attached to this film for me. Still, I'm not above admitting its flaws. William Butler turns in an absolutely cringe-inducing portrayal of Tom, while a number of the effects fall short of what you'd expect from an FX team handpicked by Savini. Uncle Rege getting hit by the steel poke looks exactly like the lump of rubber he is and when Johnny's head hits the tombstone... let's just say that I've seen more lifelike manequins at JC Penneys.

Still, there are some things in this film that are just stellar. The updated storyline plays with the viewers expectations of the film. It takes the things you know by heart and skews them just enough to catch you off guard with a new twist. Likewise, the new zombie makeups are phenomenal. Based on actual, grisly death photos they look less like homely townies and more like the lumbering corpses they are. But the most impressive thing about this movie are the performances of the two leading men. Tony Todd as Ben gives every bit of a riveting performance as Duane Jones did in the original. And on the other side of the coin, Tom Towles as Harry Cooper is the perfect a-hole foil Ben. These two really serve to bail out a movie that could have been dead on arrival and propel it into the sublime.

On the wall in my office I have a pressbook from Night of the Living Dead (1990) signed by Tom Savini and Tony Todd. At the convention I'll be adding Tom Towles' name to that list and, just like when I was a kid waiting for the premeir of the NOTLD remake, I can't hardly wait!

Video Goodness!

Night of the Living Dead (1990) - Trailer

Night of the Living Dead (1990) - Twist on the Classic Cemetery Scene

Night of the Living Dead (1990) - Uncle Rege's Big Rubber Head

Night of the Living Dead (1990) - Redneck Zombie Hoedown (Mega-Spoilage!)

Horror Hound Countdown Day #5

2007-11-01T23:14:00.001-04:00

They Live
(1988)

It may seem odd today, but back in the day, wrestlers didn't get movie scripts thrown at them willy-nilly. You had to be truly great... or freakishly large before anyone would even think of putting you in a film... and even then it was often an excrutiatingly painful affair. Look at Hulk Hogan. He was the most famous wrestler of the 80s... probably the most famous wrestler EVER and his greatest film role was a cameo in Rocky III... as a character named Thunderlips. Sure he had Mr. Nanny and Suburban Commando, but even these abysmal turns as leading man came well after his former nemesis "Rowdy" Roddy Piper's career defining role as leading man in John Carpenter's They Live.

Piper was a perfect choice for the role of Nada, a working stiff trying to make his way in the late eighties' world of crass commercialism and yuppie entitlement. He exudes an everyman quality that makes him the perfect choice as the proactive underdog, struggling against extra-terrestrial rule. But more importantly, he has the butt kicking chops to hold his own in an all-out actioner such as this. The seemingly endless fight between Piper and Keith David is the thing of legend in nerd circles... mostly because you know that these two hulking men are actually beating up on one another a little bit. Each blow is filmed up close and personal and there's not mistaking the fact that these two actors are really right there in front of you, abusing one another.

Above everything else, though, the most memorable thing about the film is Piper's dialogue. Even more than his physical abilities, Carpenter really exploited his ability to deliver some vitriolic wit at the drop of the hat. It's been said that the famous "bubble gum" line was intended as a wrestling catchphrase that Piper never used, and it ended up becoming one of the most famous lines in movie history (how it got left off of AFI's 100 Movie Quotes list is beyond me). But personally, my favorite is when he tell the old lady, "You... you look like your face fell in the cheese dip back in 1957." A hateful non sequitur that makes me laugh just thinking about it.

Video Goodness!

They Live - Trailer

They Live - The "Bubblegum" Scene

They Live - The Infamous Fight Scene

The Fight Scene Mixed with the South Park Parody

Horror Hound Countdown Day #4

2007-10-31T18:32:00.002-04:00

Halloween: 25 Years of Terror

(2006)

Halloween is probably the most played out movie of them all 'round this time of year, so I decided to take a little different route. Instead of watching the 1978 classic, I watched Halloween 25 Years of Terror; a documentary about the entire series of films called. I had been thinking about buying this for a while and found it the other day at the record store (yes, I know it's lame that I call it the "record store") in a double pack with Halloween for $19.99. I take it up to the counter and find out that there's a buy one get one free deal going on. So, I bought Slither too. And then on top of everything else, the whole mess of DVDs rang up as costing $14.99! I have to say, though, that this documentary would have been worth the $19.99 on its own.

Originally intended as a convention video, the documentary contains a lot of footage from the 25th anniversary "Return to Haddonfield" convention where thousands of Halloween fans from around the world converged on Pasadena, CA (the filming location of the fictional Haddonfield) to schmooze wi th other fans and franchise celebs. Sensing that they had much more on their hands than a simple souvineer for the attendees, the producers cobbled together what is the definitive overview of the series. With brand new interviews from the stars, directors and other sundry film people, no stone is left unturned from part one all the way through Ressurrection.

Probably the coolest feature of the disc (and, in fact, the reason I bought it) is Sean Clark's contribution, Horror's Hallowed Grounds; wherein he takes the viewer on a tour of the major shooting locations from the original film. Clark was at the last convention where he screened the Halloween episode of the show and it was so much fun that I really felt like it was something I needed to support. Shot with a good mix of humor and fanboy awe, it's a blast to watch and leaves you wanting to see it done with more movies (he's done scads of others in print, find the links at the myspace page below). It's a pretty cool concept and one that I hope he's able to parlay into an ongoing series.

Video Goodness!

Horror's Hallowed Grounds: Myspace

Horror's Hallowed Grounds: Panel at TX Fearfest

Horror Hound Countdown Day #3

2007-10-30T23:05:00.001-04:00

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

(1974)

For genre fans, one of the biggest attendees at the convention this November will be Gunnar Hansen. For those not in the know, Hansen played the role of Leatherface in the original version of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and, outside of that, never really had any other major film credits to speak of. Sure he did a few horror cameos and such but nothing even approaching the magnitude of playing the Stihl wielding maniac from this 1974 classick. As a side note; I find it completely hilarious is the fact that thes guy who played Leatherface looks exactly like my dad. So I can't wait to get a pic with him in November!

There's not much that I can say about this movie that hasn't been said before (and more eloquently). It is disturbing, gritty and leaves you feeling hollow at the end. The major players in the film are pretty amazing, especially the manical family that lure the young adults to their den of dismemberment. I mean, they pretty much set up the template for all homicidal hillbillies that came after them. Of course, Hansen pulls off Leatherface so well that I half expect him to be a tad bit 'tarded when I meet him come November. Jim Siedow is the perfect comic foil for Edwin Neal's "Hitchhiker" character. And, of course, John Dugan (also appearing at the Horror Hound Weekend) plays it straight and practically motionless as the decomposing patriarch of the family "Grandpa."

The best acting of all, however, comes from Marilyn Burns. Make no mistake. No other woman before or since has conveyed terror more believably on screen. It's not just a couple of shrieks here and there either. It is a prolonged, agonizing fright that builds and builds to the point where she is less a human being and more a frightened animal fueled by adrenaline and a natural flight instinct. It's beautiful and horrifying at the same time.

I can't imagine that very many of you haven't seen this one, but if you haven't... you should be ashamed. Especially if you've seen the remake excreted a few years back by Michael Bay and company. See the real deal. You're not likely to see a more horrifying film anytime soon.

Video Goodness!

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre - Trailer

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre - Intro

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre - Hitchhiker Scene

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre - The Dinner Scene

Horror Hound Countdown Day #2

2007-10-29T23:24:00.001-04:00

Summer School

(1987)

Inexplicably, in the pecking order of Horror Hound Weekend celebrities, Shawnee Smith comes in second to John Landis as far as star power goes. I can only imagine that having breasts goes a long way in boosting your rating at a nerdfest such as this. Shawnee Smith is probably best known for her role in the Saw movies. I think that she's been in all of them so far, but I could be wrong. Honestly, after seeing that the first one (which is considered by many to be the only good one) was a steaming dookie loaf I couldn't be bothered with any of the rest.

In my mind, Ms. Smith will always be the dumb receptionist from Becker, but that's not to say that she didn't make some appearances in some pretty decent feature films (even if she was just a tertiary character). While she appeared in remakes of The Blob and Carnival of Souls, my favorite film that she appeared in wasn't a horror film at all, but a high school comedy.

In Summer School Shawnee Smith is part of a pretty good ensemble of teen outcasts that antagonize Mark Harmon's as the comic foil. In some ways, they are the anti-Breakfast Club. Sure they represent most of the teen movie stereotypes; there's a nerd, a jock, a duo of knuckle headed punks, and a foreign exchange student, but here, despite their respective positions in the high school hierarchy, they are all misfits and failures forced to give up their summer to make up lost English credits. They start out with that strong bond and learn quickly that together they can bully the well-meaning substitute to do their bidding.

Summer School, of course, was one of the first major releases to star Mark Harmon and, despite his dearth of recent success, it's obvious why he was the "it" guy for at least a fleeting moment. Even in this inconsequential role, he is completely charismatic and charming. Harmon plays Freddie Shoop, a gym teacher who gets railroaded into teaching summer English. He's a jovial, doormat of a man that wants to be liked by everyone and that's exactly what gets him in trouble with the group of students he is put in charge of.

Summer School features two of the most original character ever to appear in a high school comedy. Dave and "Chainsaw" are a couple of horror-punks that delight in being generally disruptive, but get really nasty with an arsenal of prosthetic gore effects and buckets of blood. Of course, this all culminates in a scene of faux classroom carnage that would never pass in these post-Columbine days, but was good clean fun back int he late 80s.

Back in the day I loved this movie, but watching it again recently I realize that it has lost a little bit of its lustre for me. Honestly, it's just a lot more corny than I remembered it being. It's very broad and built to appeal to an impressionable middle schooler. And in my case, it succeeded. I'm gonna pass this one on to my middle school aged nephews to see what they think.

Video Goodness!

Summer School - School Room Massacre Scene

Summer School - Classic "Tension Breaker" Scene

Bizarre, Homemade Mark Harmon Tribute Montage

Gettin' My Nerd On II: Electric Boogaloo!

2007-10-28T21:38:00.000-04:00

It's been a long time since I last posted, but the second Indianapolis HorrorHound Weekend is quickly approaching and this time around me and the boys are gonna do it up right. We're not just gonna hit it up one day, but we've got weekend passes baby, plus reservations in the very hotel that the con is going down at. Honestly, I'm pretty friggin' excited and thought that I'd attempt to watch a horror film that's in some way related to the convention everyday until the 16th. 20 days... 20 movies. Hit up Blockbuster and you can play along!

Horror Hound Countdown Day #1

An American Werewolf in London
(1981)

Probably the biggest name to be added to the guest list for this November's convention is John Landis. Honestly, that's a pretty amazing feat considering he's most well known as a comedic director. Kentucky Fried Movie, Three Amigos, Spies Like Us, Animal House, Coming to America, and The Blues Brothers are all classics. But his one, big horror feature, An American Werewolf in London, really blew the genre wide open and set the gold standard for fright films in the 80s. Pretty impressive.

When I was a kid, this one was on HBO all the time and it seemed like I watched it from start to finish each and every airing. That's especially bizarre considering the significant amount of gore and sexual content in the film (one of the two major transformation scenes takes place in a porno theater!). But those were different times, you know. To give you an idea of just how impressionable I was at the time, I had this puffy jacket and a backpack that I wore all the time because I thought it was like the one worn by the main character David Kessler (David Naughton). Weird. While most kids were looking up to Michael Knight and B.A. Baracus I was idolizing the tragic hero of a hard R rated horror film.

I loved everything about the movie, but I was especially nuts about that amazing transformation scene. It was that scene that led to me getting into make-up and special effects. From there I moved on to discover the legendary Dick Smith, the splatter films of Tom Savini, but, in the beginning, it was Rick Baker's groundbreaking and Oscar winning effects in An American Werewolf in London that got my juices flowing and made me a genre fan for life.

As I look back at the movie, I am amazed at how well it holds up. Even though it's been more than 25 years, the movie has aged amazingly well. More than anything else, I was surprised at how funny the film actually is. Painfully funny. Funny in a much darker and sadistic way than anything else of its time. I've heard that the critics didn't really know what to think of this movie when it came out and that really shouldn't come as a surprise. Landis was just ahead of the curve by about 20 or so years.

At the convention in November they're going to be screening a premier of the new documentary Beware the Moon: Remembering An American Werewolf in London. In addition to John Landis, the star of AWIL, David Naughton will also be in attendance. Honestly, I can't heap enough praise on this movie. It's easily in my top five of all time and if you haven't seen it start to finish, do so immediately.

Video Goodness!

An American Werewolf in London - Trailer

An American Werewolf in London - Japanese Trailer

An American Werewolf in London - Transformation Scene

Beware the Moon: Remembering An American Werewolf in London - Trailer

David Naughton in An Early Commercial - Dr. Pepper

Indy 4's Got a New Title!

2007-09-11T21:00:00.000-04:00

A title anouncement hasn't left me feeling this queasy since Attack of the Clones. Of course, it is marginally better than Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem , right? Right?

A Bloody Mess!

2007-09-02T20:12:00.000-04:00

Halloween

(2007)

Yes, we're all pretty sick of the '70s horror retreads that Hollywood has been throwing our way in recent years.There for a while you couldn't listen to a horror podcast or peruse a horror website without someone wanting to flog that old (un?)dead horse. But these days it seems that everyone has resigned themselves to the fact that crappy "re-imaginings" are inevitable. In fact, complaining about these remakes has already transitioned from being a quick and easy way to acrue geek-hipster cache to being a tired cliche that nobody in the scene wants to touch anymore.

Interestingly enough, way back in 2002 it was Rob Zombie, director of the new remake of Halloween and former astrocreep, who threw in his own two cents on the subject of horror remakes. In a quote from Are You Going? magazine concerning remakes, Zombie said, I feel it's the worst thing any filmmaker can do. I actually got a call from my agent and they asked me if I wanted to be involved with the remake of Chainsaw. I said no f***ing way! Those movies are perfect -- you're only going to make yourself look like an a**hole by remaking them. So the obvious question that raises itself is whether Zombie was able to take Halloween, a bonafide fright classic, and put his stamp on it while avoiding the curse that brought down the slew of remaking a**holes that came before him. And if you'd asked me for an answer two days ago, my answer would have been, "I don't care."

To be honest, Halloween was not my favorite of the big three horror franchise films. I adored the Nightmare on Elm Street series, dug many of the Friday the 13th films, but, at best, I was ambivalent to the Halloween movies. That is not to say that I did not recognize their place of honor in the genre. In fact, some of my earliest memories are of being freaked out watching the original through my fingers at my grandparents' house. But in the end, much like with the remakes of The Hills Have Eyes and The Fog, I was never invested enough in the original to warrant outrage upon hearing of a remake. But as the end of August grew nearer and nearer (much like a lurching, knife-weilding shape in the shadows) my desire to see Zombie's latest grew too big to ignore.

I had only recently seen his previous two films. To be honest, I enjoyed parts of both House of 1,000 Corpses and The Devil's Rejects, but in the end felt that they were lacking. I didn't know why I had such on overwhelming urge to check out Zombie's Halloween, but I suspect its similar to the urge you get to stare at an accident as you drive by. You know its gonna be horrible, but how else are you gonna be able to explain to your friends and family just how horrible it was? No, you go into these things with a morbid curiosity, you wanna see just how bad things can be, and on this front, Halloween did not disappoint.

The primary problem with Zombie's version of the film lies in the very reason he cited as impetus for remaking the original. In interviews he stated that a remake would provide opportunity to look into Michael Myers' past and to see what made him into the ruthless killer that he is. And, in fact, Zombie spends nearly half of the film tracing Myers' backstory. But in both the original film and in the remake, Dr. Loomis is quick to point out that Myers is evil incarnate. And if he is the embodiment of evil, then he don't need no reason to do what he do. Rob Zombie goes outta his way to show that Myers makes no distinction in killing those who have wronged him and killing those who've been kind to him, but in providing a "reason" for the murderous activity, he has kinda dulled the blade.

In addition to being unnecessary, Zombie's portrait of a young serial killer is quite flaccid. As you would expect, the director wastes no time in taking the audience straight into the perpetually dingy world of American low-culture. Be certain, Rob Zombie considers himself quite the expert on the white-ghetto aesthetic. It's all flop sweat and carpet stains as we first enter into the white trash world of the Myers home, but what we're really supposed to be appalled at is the treatment of the aspiring slasher. He has a layabout step-dad who just doesn't understand him and, horror of horrors, a slutty big sister that picks on him! I have to say that if everyone who grew up in a similar situation ended up as murderers, it wouldn't be long before they ran outta people to kill.

I'd have much rather seen Zombie go the other route. We've seen him do the hillbilly horror thing already. If he absolutely HAD to show a Michael Myers backstory, it would have been much cooler to go all David Lynch. Do it up as middle class suburbia ... but with a dark side. I mean, that's actually truer to life, right? Jeffrey Dahmer, suburban middle-class childhood. Ted Bundy, suburban middle-class childhood. At this point, everyone knows that it's not the freaks that get picked on at school that grow up to be serial killers. They discover drugs. No, it's the quiet, seemingly well-adjusted ones. Those are the guys that go on to stockpile disembodied genitals in their grandparents' basement. Young Michael Myers should have never donned a Kiss T-shirt, but instead a turtle neck and sweater vest combo.

Another pitfall that Zombie falls into with this film is the silly mythologizing of franchise iconography. It's a pretty standard affair with remakes such as these. Sometimes it's merely a quick homage to the original film. Sometimes a little pomp and circumstance to make the occasion a little more momentous, but there's always a point in these movies where the villain gets his knife or axe or whatever, and the audience is supposed to be all like, "Hell yeah!" In Halloween, of course, this moment is when Myers gets his iconic mask. In the new version of the film, Zombie decided to introduce the mask quite early. In fact, it's introduced during a sex scene between sister Judith and her boyfriend. This was undoubtedly done so that the audience would get to see a 10-year-old Mikey Myers don his famous mask (looking much like a bobble head doll) as he commits his last murder before being locked away in the asylum. Of course, the problem that arises in introducing the mask so early is the fact that, when he comes back all those years later, he needs to have that exact same mask. Of course, young Michael did what any psychotic prepubescent on a killing spree would do: He buried it under the floorboards, thus preserving the mask in pristine condition for more than a decade. Lame.

Now, I know that I'm being pretty harsh on the movie. But please understand that it deserves it. It is, in fact, a steaming loaf. But despite this fact, I can still point to a couple of things about the film that I found mildly interesting. A lot of people talk about the visual sophistication of Zombie's films. To be quite honest, I don't see it. The stylistic flourishes and such that he throws in are pretty cliche in the genre these days. I mean, seriously, if I see one more cut away to grainy black and white "news footage" I'm gonna go on a murder spree of my own. But at one point in Halloween, Zombie did something that I found interesting. As the police are processing the crime scene at the Myers' house, he puts the action on pause and does a kind of living tableau. It's not a freeze frame or one of those 3-D whirl-arounds like from The Matrix. It was simply a pan of the entire cast as they held their positions. Nothing too profound, but just an interesting idea that would have better served just about any other scene in the movie.

Another thing that was decent in this version was the depiction of the adult Michael Myers. While I can already hear all of the fans decrying this film as the worst entry into the franchise (and that's saying something ... I mean, Halloween III: Season of the Witch?) one thing that can't be denied is the fact that Rob Zombie's Michael Myers is the most brutal depiction of the killer ever brought to the screen. Sure he's armed with his everpresent kitchen knife, but his worst blows are dealt out by hand. Umpteen times in the movie he assaults people, slamming them up against walls and windows with such speed and ferocity that I actually cringed and squirmed in my seat with every rapid-fire thud. While it was difficult to imagine that these skull crushing blows were being dealt by the chubby 10-year-old that has been locked away for 15 years, the brutality of the attacks was undeniable.

I guess if nothing else good has come from Rob Zombie's Halloween, a lot of genre stalwarts are gonna get a pretty sweet payday. In fact, the best part of the movie (that is to say ... one of the only good parts of the movie) was pointing out the parade of horror and cult film vets that make appearances. Of course, this goes to show that Zombie is the ultimate horror fan's filmmaker. As a fan himself, he wants to pay tribute to those "perfect films" he enjoyed growing up. Somewhere along the line, however, he began to assume that he was above the criticisms that other remakers have endured and in doing so has proved himself to be every bit of the a**hole that he accused them of being. Here's hoping next time around he'll treat us to an original vision.

Supermarket Death Match

2007-07-10T18:55:00.000-04:00

Hey, I know we've been pushing our sister blog pretty hard lately, but I thought you'd be interested in checking out this quick vid I throught together for it. We were making salsa verde and I wanted Tricia to do a taste test between the homemade and a store bought variety.

HorrorHound Weekend: The Recap

2007-07-09T20:29:00.000-04:00

Hey, I know it's been a while. Tricia and I have been cooking up a storm and blogging over at our sister blog at the Chronicle-Tribune, The Grub Report. In other words, we've been focusing much more on the meals than the movies. But fear not! We got plenty of movie news and reviews in the queue. And I wanted to update today with a little recap of me and my nephews Michael and Jacobs trip to the HorrorHound Weekend this past weekend in Indy.

Growing up, I wanted nothing more than to be able to attend one of these affairs. Fangoria was constantly pimping their Weekend of Horrors back inthe day, but it was all could do to look at the pictures and dream of a day when I might actually be able to go to a real horror convention. When I learned of the HorrorHound Weekend coming to Indy, I not only decided on the spot that I'd be going, but that I'd also take my teenaged nephews to give them a little taste of what I was into when I was their age... Oh, who am I kidding? I am still waaaay into this stuff!

Before heading out to the convention, I made sure to give the boys a crash course in horror. I mean, like many of the kids their age they thought that Final Destination and Scream were the pinnacle of horror. To get them ready we watched a number of films featuring the celebs that would be attending the convention. Two of their faves were Candyman and Night of the Living Dead '90. So, it's probiably no surprise that they were pretty psyched to meet Tony Todd. After I had him sign my press kit from Night of the Living Dead, I told him that the boys and I had watched those two films the night before coming and he talked to the boys a bit about how they liked them. Then he was gracious enough to pose for a shot with Michael and Jacob. After they had the chance to chat up Tony Todd a bit and get their picture, the boys couldn't stop talking about how huge the man was. And they're right. I mean, check out those hands. It's like the boys have a bunch of bananas draped over their shoulders!

At this point, the boys had gotten over their initial jitters and were into the whole "talking to celebs" thing. So we decided to hunt down another. In amongst the horror films that I watched wi th the boys, I included an old documentary produced by Fangoria called Scream Greats Vol. #1 which traced the history of special effects legend, Tom Savini (well, up until 1986 anyway). The boys were way into the behind the scenes stuff and came to the same conclusion that thousands of horror fans have come to before them... Savini is a genius. While we were waiting in line to get into the convention, I got a tap on my shoulder from Michael and he said in a whisper, "Isn't that Tom Savini?" and it was. He walked right by us and Micheal was completely in awe. It was cool to see that that my nephews were starting to hold these guys in the same high esteem as I do. This shot is of Me, Jacob and Tom Savini.

Evidently, we were among the few people who had a chance to catch Jeff Fahey. He apparently arrived late and then left early on Friday. Fahey, of course, was the star of The Lawnmower Man and had a pretty good role in Rodriguez' half of Grindhouse, Planet Terror. The Fahey film that I watched with the boys, though, was Body Parts. It's the story of a man who loses an arm only to have it replaced with that of a stone cold killer. Of course the arm has a mind of its own and wastes no time getting up to no good. My only regret in meeting Mr. Fahey was that the boys and I didn't get a chance to pitch our idea for a sequel to his 1991 tale of amputation gone awry. It'd involve a completely new set of evil organs and it'd be called, Body Parts II: Satan's Num-nums. With a name like that, how can you not go see it?!?!

While we watched quite a few horror films in preparation for the convention, one movie that I wanted the boys to see was not a horror film at all. It was a musical comedy. I have been pushing the Ramones on the boys for a while, so it was only a matter of time before I showed them the epic that is Rock 'n' Roll High School. The boys saw that I had the soundtrack album in my bag, but didn't realize that there was gonna be anyone at the convention from the film. As soon as they caught a glimpse of P.J. Soles, they knew right away who she was. Jacob asked, "Is that Riff?" and that was exactly how she signed my album, "To Steve, Gabba Gabba Hey! P.J. Soles 'Riff Randall'" And out of all the celebs, she was really the most personable, and even told a couple of short stories about working with the Ramones on the movie. Really, it doesn't get any cooler than that. Plus, check out the shirt... I grabbed this one out of the closet expressly for this photo opportunity!

After meeting so many celebs, we decided to check out a film and luckily we were just in time to catch Sean Clark's first entry into what will (hopefully) be a series of documentaries on horror film locations called, Horror's Hallowed Grounds. The film (featured in the DVD, Halloween: 25 Years of Terror) covered nearly all of the major locations from John Carpenter's original Halloween and was every bit as entertaining as it was informative. Also, we got to see some raw footage for an upcoming doc on The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Afterward, we were treated to a little Q&A with the director in which he discussed possible future episodes, his love of Halloween III: Season of the Witch and his grudge against Don Coscarelli. Very cool stuff!

Next, I had to give in to something that the boys had been bugging me about since we walked in the door. They haven't seen Grindhouse (I mean, c'mon... they're twelve and thirteen years old) but as soon as they got a look at the babysitter twins (Electra and Elise Avellan) featured in Planet Terror, they had to get a picture taken with them. Even if those boys knew nothing of the movie, they sure knew that these girls were hot! I had them sign their picture in my Grindhouse book and then I asked them if they'd mind posing with the boys. They were more than happy to. I was having a hard time getting my camera out and apologized for taking so long and one of them said, "That's okay. It gives us more time to hug these boys!" Yeah, I'm pretty sure I heard the boys panting at that point. Check out the picture. Jacob is smiling bigger than I've ever seen him and Michael is just in a daze! Hilarious!

The last celeb we got to meet was Sid Haig. It was kinda weird, because I couldn't really show the boys any of his films. Of course, he's most famous for his role as Captain Spaulding in House of 1,000 Corpses and The Devil's Rejects, but my sister would have killed me if I would have watched those movies with the boys (actually, we did watch the first five minutes of House of 1,000 Corpses just so they'd at least know who he was). Then, my favorites of his films are the Jack Hill blaxploitation and women in prison movies. Once again, not the best idea to be showing those ones to middle schoolers. So, I was surprised that Michael wanted to get his autograph. I guess that little snippet of Sid as Captain Spaulding made an impression on him, because as we stepped up to the table Michael was obviously a little skittish. Sid gave him a little, "What's a' matter boy? Ya' scared of clowns?" and I thought Michael was gonna shoot a dookie. I think the weird face Michael has on in this picture is less about being unprepared for a photo and more about fearing for his life!

Needless to say, we had a great time. We got to watch some cool movies together and meet some cool horror celebrities. The HorrorHound Weekend is returning to Indy in November with a brand new group of horror celebs and we're already making plans to go. I know the boys are already excited for that one and to tell you the truth... so am I!

2007-05-24T13:36:00.000-04:00

It's official.

We've joined the online community at www.chronicle-tribune.com.

Check out our new blog, The Grub Report.

Rest assured: We're not abandoning Meals and Movies. But we'll be posting with regularity on the C-T's site. And you can even join the conversation! (Comment away!)

Gettin' My Nerd On!

2007-05-05T15:29:00.000-04:00

Hey, It's been a while since I last posted, but I got some pretty exciting news. After a brief moment of doubt, I'm able to confirm that I will be attending the Horrorhound Magazine convention in Indianapolis this July. It's gonna be a geek-tastic affair with plenty of horror movie icons in attendance. Sid Haig (Big Bird Cage), Bill Moesley (Texas Chainsaw Massacre Part 2), Ken Foree (Dawn of the Dead), PJ Soles (Rock and Roll High School) and Tony Todd (Candy Man) will all be in attendance, but the main attraction is the Planet Terror reunion of Michael Biehn, Jeff Fahey, Tom Savini and those hot-tempered, latina babysitters that go bananas with a pick axe. Good stuff! Anyway, I get the pleasure of taking my nephews w ith me and I'm excited to develop a little pre-convention curriculum to get them acquainted with the material. Maybe I'll throw together an in-depth DVD featuring classic horror moments that they have to watch and then give a comprehensive final exam. It'll be fun!

Anyway, click here to check out the Horrorhound Weekend website. Maybe we'll see you there!

Grind This!

2007-04-09T20:50:00.000-04:00

You know those thirty year-old mega losers that get all into doing fan videos based on the Star Wars films. I always thought that was pretty lame, you know. Playing dress up and play fighting with plastic swords. Of course, it was halfway through my parody of this Grindhouse trailer that I realized... oh crap! I am one of those guys.

I've been meaning to do some short vids on the site, highlighting some of my favorite recipes... when I had a silly idea. I was planning to make some homemade pork sausage and all of a sudden, Grindhouse became Groundpork! Don't expect to see my ugly behind on camera. Maybe just a hand or forearm. I've spared you that horror, for now. I basically cobbled together a bunch of random shots from old exploitation films (can you identify them all?!?!) and some stuff from old educational films. Look for the crude, home grown effects I did that show pigs running from explosions and blood splattering from a side of pork. Simultaneously subtle and lame!

Also, don't forget that there actually is a recipe in there. It's a pretty basic breakfast sausage recipe you can build upon to suit your taste. You know, add some crushed pepper or other spices... it's up to you. Anyway, without further ado, check out Groundpork:

Double Feature Picture Show!

2007-04-07T19:15:00.001-04:00

Make no mistake... I went into Grindhouse expecting it to be the greatest film ever made. Yeah, I know that's a pretty ridiculous expectation for any adult to have (heck, ask any Star Wars fan), but I couldn't help it. I was giddy with anticipation and could hardly bring myself to wait a single day after its premiere so that my wife could go with me. (Somehow I managed, but those 24 hours were excruciating.) Honestly, there was no way that ANY movie could have lived up to the expectations that I had for this one. I mean... this movie was made FOR me... or people like me, anyway. So, it had to be the greatest spectacle to ever hit the screens, right? Well, as I surely suspected in the deepest recesses of my brain, it wasn't. But I'll be damned if it didn't come real close.

As I'm sure you know, Grindhouse is not so much a movie as it is two separate and distinct movies presented in a "double feature" format. So for ease of reading and writing I will review the two films as separate .

Planet Terror
(2007)

The other day I was at my parents house, and my dad was watching Sin City on cable. I asked if he'd seen the trailers for Grindhouse, and he asked, "Oh, you mean that movie with the girl who has a machine gun for a leg?" That little scenario proves that if Robert Rodriguez learned nothing else from the masters of exploitation cinema, he sure learned the most important rule: Give the audience something to remember. Even if Grindhouse fails miserably at the box office and is shuffled off to the bottoms of $5 dvd bins around the country, you can rest assured that twenty years down the line people our age are gonna remember "the movie where the girl had a machine gun for a leg." It's the kinda thing that catapults an already good chunk of storytelling to the sublime.

Rodriguez offers up a pretty straightforward zombie apocalypse story, but deftly weaves so many interesting story arcs throughout the chaos that you are absolutely riveted from the first tattered frame to the last. Dakota Block is a doctor and the wife of a doctor looking to escape from beneath the domineering hand of her husband. El Wray is the local misfit looking to rekindle an affair with unipedal go-go dancer Cherry Darling. The local police are as clueless as they are bumbling and must unite with the town's rag-tag crew of survivors to take on the shadowy military agency responsible for the viral outbreak.

One of the film's major strengths lies in its character actor-populated ensemble cast. Just like in the classic exploitation films, you'll find no bona fide movie stars here. At least not in leading roles. Planet Terror is a bizarro world in which Bruce Willis is relegated to the sidelines to give more face time to genre stalwarts such as Jeff Fahey, Michale Biehn and (cue heavenly choirs) Tom Savini. Rose McGowan is pitch perfect as the stoic non-victim Cherry Darling and successfully cements her position as the Reese Witherspoon for the horror set.

It's impossible to talk about Grindhouse without addressing the lengths the filmmakers went to in order to make the films look like authentic artifacts from years gone by. While every second of the entire "double feature" was created to evoke the feel of vintage exploitation cinema, it's obvious that Rodriguez took the most care in preserving the "grindhouse experience." With all the grit and grime of a war-torn print that's travelled movie houses from coast to coast, Planet Terror certainly has the look and retro-cool visuals to spare, but it's the music that makes this feature seem so legit.

Taking cues from John Carpenter, Rodriguez composed the sparse, pulsating score for the film and in doing so succeeded in giving the film more of a retro feel than any amount of faux dust n' scratches could have. The primary theme, a bluesy guitar and sax piece, is revisited throughout the film in a series of synth riffs remeniscent of the Goblin score for Dawn of the Dead.

As the horror genre continues in its current "retrospective" phase, it's nice to see filmmakers who choose to pay homage to the past with an original and innovative vision instead of bland "remakes." I'd much rather see a quick, wink-wink nod to Fulci than an unnecessary update of one of his films, and that's exactly the kind of thing that Rodriguez excels at. He's a cinematic remix artist, mining the depths of forgotten celluloid and making something fresh, cool and new.

Coming Attractions:

As you are probably well aware, one of the more novel concepts that serves to round out the whole "double feature eperience" was the inclusions of trailers for imaginary exploitation titles. It's no secret that the majority of these exploitation films failed to top the trailers that advertised them. In truth, the trailers most often contained all of the best bits from the film, in hopes of getting as many butts in the seats as possible. So, basically in a grindhouse trailer you got a condensed, easily digestible version of the film itself. It's amazing how ahead of their times those filmmakers were.

Machete

Danny Trejo's spectacularly craggy face takes center stage in a trailer that kicks off the ride that is Grindhouse. It's a revenge story about one bad Mexican taking on a group of suited baddies who've duped him into a faux assassination attempt. With assistance from a heavily armed priest, the pair take on "the man" with more intensity than any blaxploitation anti-hero you can imagine. Rodriguez gives us a brand spanking new subgenre of exploitation cinema. Call it, Mexploitation! Oh yeah, I dunno what happened, but the word going into this film was that there were three trailers directed by guest directors and one each from Tarantino and Rodriguez. Obviously we got Machete, but was where was QT's sexploitation trailer, Cowgirls in Sweden? What gives!?!?

Werewolf Women of the S.S.

Rob Zombie takes on the most taboo subgenre of exploitation cinema, nazisploitation. I particularly love how the trailer keeps coming back to the same clip again and again to punctuate the title. You just know that if this film really existed, that would be the only scene with a werewolf int he entire film! I don't know how many times I've seen that kinda thing in real trailers from the era.

Don't

Edgar Wright rocks the kind of trailer that films with few shocking images to entice an audience have to go with. We're talking about 80% style and 20% substance. Sure you get little snippets of story, but in the end... it's all about raising questions that only viewing the film can answer.

Thanksgiving

Eli Roth rounds out the coming attractions right with a season-specific slasher flick in the grand tradition of the 80s classicks My Bloody Valentine and Silent Night, Deadly Night. As far as the trailers go, it's obvious that the film makers saved the best for last. I mean, how did this film not get made.

Death Proof
(2007)

The name Quentin Tarantino calls to mind such certain expectations that it is nearly a film genre unto itself. Explicit violence, "deep cuts" from forgotten albums and copious amounts of pop-culture-peppered dialogue are the hallmarks of his films and, believe me, in Death Proof you get plenty of all that. The only problem is that you get it in the wrong ratio. The classic exploitation films were cinema boiled down to their most basic components. They were immediate and visceral and were crafted by workhorse directors who understood that if you want to keep your audience, you have to keep the action coming.

In interviews about Grindhouse the directing team expressed a desire to create exploitation films that actually made good on all of their trailers' impossible promises, but I think the two directors came at their projects from different angles. Rodriguez created the ultimate exploitation film: unabashedly over the top. Tarantino, it seems, wanted to beef-up a classic exploitation-type flick and turn it into a full-fledged film. He wanted to keep the moral ambiguity, the brutality, the sleazy swagger and add in all those "real movie" things that the typical grindhouse fare lacked: well written dialogue, character development, you know... basic storytelling-type stuff. The only problem is that stuff simply doesn't belong in exploitation cinema.

Remember, for every classic exploitation title you've heard of there are probably fifty more that don't even exist any more in any form. That's a lot of trial and error. In the handful of grindhouse "success stories," though, dialogue and character development are never major strong points. People come into these types of films with a certain set of expectations, and sitting through scene after scene of people talking is not on the list. For the first twenty-odd minutes of Death Proof, that's exactly what you get. Girls driving around Austin, talking. Girls sitting in a taco joint, talking. Girls at a bar, listening to T. Rex and talking. And their conversations, for the most part, have nothing to do with the story. I understand the idea of establishing a backstory for your characters, but when your audience has come out to see a film that's actually called Grindhouse, you can't let them go that long listening to the idle chatter of three abravise young ladies without tossing in a little violence or nudity to snap them back into the story. It's just against the rules. Now, I don't do spoiler warnings, so if you're a big baby, go ahead and ignore the next sentence or two. The fact that Death Proof spends an entire half of the movie introducing characters that are killed off is a travesty. Any grindhouse director worth his salt would surely agree that character development for murder victims is a waste of time and, more importantly, money.

The second half of the movie involves the villain, Kurt Russell as Stuntman Mike, tracking down a new set of babes to vehicularly assassinate. Unfortunately for him, the crew he's set his eyes on includes a couple of no nonsense Hollywood stuntbabes. Obviously, this group isn't going to put up with his antics lying down. These girls represent the amazonian godesses that doled out many a much deserved ass thumpin in 70s exploitation films. They are so obviously destined to give Stuntman Mike his comeuppance that you actually want to know a little something about their background. Sure you get little snippets of backstory here and there, but what you actually glean is just this side of nothing. It's ironic. The first group of girls... their function in the story was essentially that of a plot-advancing device, and we knew everything about them. This group essentially represents the collective hero of the piece, and we get next to nothing. I would have felt better about it if we would have gotten too much info on both groups, or no info on either group, but as it is in the film it just seems backwards and wrong.

Don't get me wrong. Death Proof does not ruin Grindhouse as a total film experience. In fact, there is much in it that could warrant a full ticket price as a standalone movie. Kurt Russell turns in a great performance playing a disgruntled relic from the grindhouse heyday. He's not so much a monster as he is a charming "regular guy" who just happens to enjoy offing young ladies with his flat black Chevy Nova. The stunts have all obviously been performed live for the camera and at times they had me squirming in my seat. And the two major kill scenes... one is so abrupt that, even though you know it's inevitable, it still takes you by surprise and leaves you feeling a bit hollow. The other is presented like a horrifying, slow-mo ballet that you'd look away from if it weren't so sickeningly captivating.

I truly appreciate what Tarantino was trying to do with Death Proof. I don't know how many times I've fantasized about taking an obscure film and making it into a "real" movie (keep an eye out for my sleazy-cool take on Beat Girl coming out sometime around two thousand and never!). But as a filmmaker with a true love of all cinema and a special place in his heart for exploitation films, I would have expected him to understand the fundamentals of the genre he was attempting to pay homage to. Instead, he allowed a love of hearing his own voice (I mean, a "hot chick" referencing Zatoichi? C'mon!) to make what could have been a mindblowingly wild ride into what was at its highest point an okay film and at lowest, the very definition of tedium.

If you haven't seen it one of the other hundred times I've posted it on the blog, you can find the Grindhouse trailer here.

Why Grindhouse Matters:

2007-04-07T18:10:00.000-04:00

Because I was born during the mid-seventies in the Mid West, I never had any first hand experience with the grindhouse phenomenon. You know, those pervy theaters that showed low-budget movies designed to shock and titillate the metropolitan underbelly? Of course, here in the fly-over states we had to catch those films as they rolled through our drive-ins, but even though there might have been a little more privacy in the cockpit of your Ford Maverick, the experience was essentially the same. By the time I was aware of the world around me, video tape had toppled the once mighty world of independent shock cinema and the theaters that had once given these misfit films refuge had almost unanimously made the (more profitable) switch to hardcore pornography.

Flash forward to... oh, I dunno... 1983. It's still the early days for video, and movie companies are in the middle of a particularly rewarding game of catch-up. After quickly rolling out cassettes for the most popular titles from their back catalogues, all they had to do is sit back and count the money coming in from films which had previously been degrading on a dusty shelf. A few enterprising scallywags outside of the movie mainstream saw the money making potential in the new home video market and began to release some of the forgotten films from the grindhouse heyday. To compete with the majors, these video outlaws adapted many of the same tactics used by the pioneers of exploitation cinema to market their outrageous videos. They often used those oversized vhs boxes (usually reserved for adult films) to maximize the impact of their shocking box art.

My first video store experience was at a shady little appliance store in Muncie called, Loker's. I was quite young at the time, but looking back, I kinda remember it as a predatory rent-to-own type of place that specialized in leasing things to people who couldn't afford them. It just so happened that they also had a ramshackle section of videos for rent, displayed on shelves cobbled from two by fours. It was in their horror section that I had my first contact with films such as Blood Feast and 2000 Maniacs. I didn't rent them, mind you. But I was always infatuated with the artwork on the box covers. The image of an underwear clad Astrid Olson staring blankly with her bloody mouth agape stuck in my seven-year-old craw and eventually led me to seek out these and other classic "video nasties."

If it had not been for these early exploitation features, originally shown in the grindhouse theaters or drive-ins and later stocked in the shadiest of shady video stores, I most likely would have never taken an interest in film and storytelling in general. What started out as a quest to seek out the most shocking and over-the-top films imaginable, eventually blossomed into a sincere reverence for great filmmaking. Sure, as a kid I loved many of the same movies that other children of the 80s were crazy about, but these movies were primal storytelling. Spielberg and Lucas? Sure they were great, but H.G. Lewis... George Romero... Lucio Fulci these were the workhorse auteurs I adored. These are the men that infected me with the movie virus. I can only hope that, if nothing else, Grindhouse the film might introduce these sorely overlooked geniuses to a wider audience than they already enjoy.

Bob Clark: 1941-2007

2007-04-04T19:46:00.000-04:00

Director Bob Clark died today in a head on collision while driving the Pacific Coast Highway. While you might not know the name right off, I'm sure that his films are surely some of your faves. He began his career with success in the horror genre. He directed the cult classick, Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things in 1972. Two years later he made waves with the original Christmas-themed horror film, Black Christmas (which pre-dated Christmas Evil and Silent Night, Deadly Night significantly). But it was in the 80s that this director truly made his mark.

In 1981, Clark practically invented the teen sex comedy genre with the smash hit Porky's, which he wrote and directed. He followed that up the next year with the sequel, Porky's II: The Next Day, but it was in 1983 that he would return to his roots with a holiday film (a comedy this time) and give the world what was surely his greatest gift. Considered by many to be the greatest holiday film ever (even topping It's A Wonderful Life on many polls!) A Christmas Story is a true American classic and a yearly tradition for nearly everyone.

As the decade went on, he released a number of other landmarks of 80s cinema. Universally panned, 1984's Sylvester Stallone/Dolly Parton vehicle Rhinestone was a pop culture punchline (until the release of Warren Beatty's Ishtar, anyway). HBO staple, Turk 182! was one of the earliest films to bring the idea of culture-jamming to the masses in 1985. And, for my money, the 1987 Judd Nelson vehicle, From the Hip, is one of the most underrated comedies ever.

Recently, Clark had been working on a remake of his earlier film Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things and was in the earliest stages of remaking Porky's.

Wannabe Spartan Somethin'!

2007-03-29T09:53:00.001-04:00

300
(2007)

The first time that I saw the trailer for 300 I was shocked by the astounding visuals. In fact, I was a bit concerned whether or not I was ready for a movie in which every single frame was a work of art that could stand on its own. That's how good it looked. I didn't know if I'd be able to enjoy such an onslaught of unrelenting visual perfection or whther it would be a case of sensory overload. I now know what I should have known from the beginning. A trailer is seldom an accurate representation of a movie as a whole and 300 is no exception. While the film has some awe inspiring moments, it has significantly more flaws than the major live-actors/cgi-setting films that came before it (Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow and Sin City actually trump this film in the looks department).

300 tells the story of a group of 300 Spartans that fought the Persian army at the battle of Thermopylae. Up against impossible odds, the Spartans stay true to their warrior's code and engage in a b itter battle to the death. King Leonidas is a wartime leader in the tradition of Henry V. Without practically no support from his community (or the derelict Ephors), he slings the Persian demands right back at them in the form of deadly steel blades and spears. It's a classic story that is certainly worthy of the epic treatment, but while this film goes out of its way to show amazing, jaw-dropping landscapes, it seems to cut corners in spots that many less ambitious films would never dream of.

There is a scene in the film where the Spartans are assembling for battle against a backdrop of the most beautifully ominous sky ever rendered by effects studio. As the soldiers raise their spears in solidarity, however, the seams of 300 become painfully evident. In this day and age, I figured that the kind of blue screen issues that inspire guffaws while watching The Neverending Story were long behind us, but I'll be darned if those Spartan weapons didn't look as if they'd been cut out by a first grade class at 2:45, the day before Spring Break! It was certainly not the worst I'd ever seen, but in the context of such a beautifully realized film, it stuck out like a sore thumb. Kinda like hanging a Picasso in a frame you bought at Big Lots.

As I was watching the film, another particularly distracting bit of CGI jumped out at me. The deformed Spartan character, Ephialtes seemed far too clean and mechanical in his construction; more akin to Jar-Jar than Gollum. Then, later I read that he wasn't CGI at all, but was instead an actual actor in actual prosthetic make-up. I was shocked and still would like to go back and look at the scenes with this character. If it is indeed true that he was the creation of make-up artists, I still have to think that the performance was inhanced via a little CGI tinkering.

Regardless of their origins, be it CGI or the old school latex and spirit gum treatment, the film seemed over run with ghouls and monsters. Honestly, I would have preferred it if the film had been a little more grounded in reality. The Persians were fearsome in their sheer numbers. There was no need to have giant, psychotic ogres for the Spartans to battle or crazy, obese executioners with battle-axe wings waiting to behead traitors. The Persian army was fearsome without all that crap. Instead, it is the Spartans that should have gotten the "bigger than life" treatment. Their wrath is legendary, and I'm not sure that ever really came across outside of the numerous troop rallying speeches. It wasn't so much a large a volume of arse whoopin' I wanted to see, but a display of incredible skill... and that never seemed to materialize.

Don't get me wrong. I wholeheartedly reccomend this film, as it is a fun romp and a great chance to see the future of the epic movie. Gerard Butler gives a pitch-perfect performance as King Leonidas and you truly understand why his men are willing to die for him. I only wish that the film would have paid as much attention to the story and the mythology surrounding the story, rather than squeezing in as much CGI as possible.

A Fist Full of Yen!

2007-03-29T09:40:00.000-04:00

The other day on the Mondo Movie podcast a listener wrote in and described the films of Takashi Miike as the cinematic equivalent of a child shewing their food and then opening their mouth to gross you out with the contents. I'd say that's a pretty accurate description, but Miike's new movie looks to be a departure from the usual shock for the sake of shock fare we are used to from the man behind Ichi the Killer and Visitor Q. Check out this wee, little trailer for his new "Eastern Western," Sukiyaki Western Django. Weird stuff.

Mars Ain't the Kind of Place to Raise a Kid!

2007-03-23T13:35:00.000-04:00

Yup, it really has been a long, long time. I've been pretty busy lately with work. I spent the preceding week teaching a "Mission to Mars" unit to the fifth graders at school. With only a week and a half to build the unit from scratch, I had little time for anything else. All in all, I think it went off pretty well. As a literacy specialist, I have little call to create lessons that focus on science and math, but I got to try my hand at it for this little unit... with mixed results.

Needless to say, I haven't had much opportunity to get out and watch many movies or DVDs. In fact, I've got the video store hounding me to return Tideland and 11:14 which are spectacularly overdue and... as of this moment... still unwatched. Not to mention that there's a couple of movies still on at the theaters that I'd like to see (namely, 300 and Black Snake Moan). But hopefully now that I'm officially on Spring Break I'll get a chance to catch up on my movie watching.

One thing that I got waiting in the wings is a review of the 1990 horror/sci-fi film, Mindwarp starring Bruce Campbell and Angus Scrimm. I fired off an email to the folks at the Reel Horror Podcast mentioning that movie, they read it on the show (check out episode #74, you can listen right on the site) and out of the sheer goodness of their heart they sent a copy of the movie to me. For free. So, I figured that at the very least I should send them a review of the film for their show and after they have included it in an episode I will be posting it here.

As for what exactly the rest of my ten days of freedom will produce... you'll just have to wait and see.

No, not turkey. Turkey!

2007-02-26T21:45:00.001-05:00

Cafe Instanbul
Newport, Kentucky

We've been doing a ton of movie reviews lately, and the meals have sorta fallen along the wayside.
Truth be told, it's a little hard to find something different enough to spur comment around these parts.
But, thanks to a business trip to Cincinnati, I got to enjoy something out of the norm: Turkish food! What's that, you say? It's kind of the bridge between Mediterranean and African foods. Cafe Istanbul, located in Newport, Ky., right across the river from Cincy, dubs itself as Mediterranean. But kebabs are a prominant part of the menu, and the flavor combos definitely stray from the Greek or Italian you might think of when you hear that word. Really, I think they just don't want to scare people off.
Anyway, here's what I wrote from the road the night I went to this beautiful place:
My selections:
Meze Sampler appetizer
(stuffed grape leaves, house-made feta, ezme, hummus, pastrami)
Salmon with Beet and Potato Puree
Coban (a.k.a. Shepherd's Salad)
Turkish Coffee
My idea of comfort food is probably a little different than most Midwestern girls'.
Ask most from around my native prairie lands to name some of their favorite foods, and they'll rattle off chicken and dumplings, fluffy mashed potatoes, sugar cream pie, even that famous giant tenderloin sandwich.
And don't get me wrong -- I love all of those things.
But I can get those things any day of the week.
There are, on the other hand, foods that I yearn for, even covet. Foods that I dream about for days after my plate is clean.
There are smells and flavors that put an instant, ecstatic smile on my face.
And at Cafe Istanbul, dish after dish had me stifling the urge to marvel outloud. (For, unfortunately, my usual tablemate in such tasty adventures was nearly 200 miles away. And I had already elicited questions from my co-workers. ("How do you know so much about hummus?")
I started with a tiny cup of Turkish coffee. Straight. In all its thick, black, sweetly spicy glory.
I'm smiling just thinking about it. (Alas, there was no fortune teller to read my grounds.)
The Meze Sampler's highlight for me was definitely the house-made feta. The dense white triangles held a pungent, clean tanginess, a treat to be enjoyed in small doses. The ezme -- a salsa, of sorts -- and hummus were good scooped up with the pita-like bread, and the stuffed grape leaves were mild but intriguing.
The Coban, or Shepherd's Salad, was a spot-on mix of diced cucumber and tomato, slivers of red onion, rings of green onion and snipped parsley, dressed lightly with a lemon vinaigrette, easy on the lemon, and piled with a milder version of the feta, grated.
My salmon was meaty and mild, but a relish on top added a nice bit of complexity. The real star of the plate, for me, was the beet and potato puree. The color was sublime, a magenta that almost seemed translucent, despite the heft of the mixture. And the taste -- it was like unearthing a buried treasure. The earthy sweetness of the beets married beautifully with the more solid, familiar taste of the potatoes.
My fellow diners gave high makrs to the tilapia, the mushroom risotto, the beef tenderloin penne arrabiatta and the chicken kebab.
But if they had known how enthralled I was, I surely would have been outed as the strange bird I am.

Sizzlin' Like Fajita Meat!

2007-02-22T22:08:00.000-05:00

Found this link via the Ain't It Cool website to what is purportedly the poster for the upcoming ATHF movie, Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters. In a 8os fantasy stylee ala Frank Frazetta. Too cool for words.

Shot Down in a Blaze of Glory!

2007-02-19T15:46:00.000-05:00

Ghost Rider

(2007)

With wildly popular film series based on Spider-man, the Fantastic Four, X-Men, and reboots for both the Superman and Batman franchises in the recent past, the movie industry is scrambling to mine the comic book world for their next golden geese. The appearance of a film based on Marvel's Ghost Rider character makes it seem as though Hollywood has finally begun scraping the bottom of the comic book barrel. I mean, what's next? A film adaptation of Andy Capp (sponsored by Hot Fries, naturally)?

Yes, it's painfully obvious that the Ghost Rider character is merely the default, 2nd tier hero to get the film treatment in the wake of the comic film boom, but in reality, the character completely warrants a movie on his own merits. He's a a flaming skeleton sent by the devil himself to harvest the souls of the damned... on a motorcycle. It don't get much cooler than that. Plus, the themes in the story are cultural touchstones embraced by artists as diverse as Stephen Vincent Benet and the Charlie Daniels' Band. It's just too bad that the filmmakers couldn't seem to keep this one as simple as it needed to be. The character is essentially a refugee of the 70s and the film should have reflected that. Instead, in Ghost Rider, we get a mish-mash of style and substance that never quite coalesces.

The film starts off promisingly. You can't go anymore "classic" with your storytelling than to kick things off with a voiceover narration. Normally, I'm not a big fan of this device (film is a visual medium, after all), but in this case it really set a tone that should have been the foundation for the entire film. Instead, Sam Elliot (voiceover king) sets us up for a mythical chunk of hillbilly gothic that never quite materializes.

When we meet up with the team of baddies that our hero must confront, it becomes painfully obvious that the remainder of the film will consist of Ghost Rider devising clever ways to dispatch each of the underlings (ghostly manifestations of earth, wind and fire... the elements, not the soul group) and finally the big boss, Blackheart (the very son of the devil). It's almost like the screenwriter (director, Mark Steven Johnson) was working from the same set of notes as the creators of any third tier video game. In fact, I'd much rather have seen Ghost Rider take on Bowser than the puny demon Wes Bentley portrays.

As much as I was disappointed by this film, I do have to still recommend getting out to see it, as it is your first opportunity to see the Grindhouse trailer on the big screen. The old man sitting behind us commented, "Wow, that looks like total garbage." To which I say, "Yes it does. Sweet, sweet garbage."

Check out the Ghost Rider Trailer here.

A Load of Grindhouse Goodness!

2007-02-16T08:07:00.000-05:00

A couple of months ago I posted a link to the teaser trailer for Grindhouse. They just released the official trailer, and, even though it doesn't seem possible, it's ten times cooler.

Plus, don't miss this interview/EPK thingie called, What is Grindhouse?

Finally, a few months ago Robert Rodriguez announced a contest where fans could create thier own, wholly original trailers in the style of 70s exploitation (much like those that will appear between the two features in Grindhouse) and the winners would be screened at the SXSW festival. The folks at Aint It Cool have rounded up a couple of collections of these fan trailers and they can be found here and here. Some are good and some are pretty bad, but my favorite (possibly for no other reason than the fact that it has the greatest name EVER) is Load Bearing Stud.

Lost or found?

2007-02-10T16:10:00.001-05:00

Pan's Labyrinth
(2006)

It's strange that a fantastic world like the one explored in Guillermo del Toro's latest film would feel so familiar.

As I watched the movie, fascinated, I wondered why I felt so at home.

There was, of course, the mastery of the writer/director, del Toro, weaving a heartbreaking story between two worlds -- the early days of Franco's fascist Spain and the magical one beyond the labyrinth.

And, of course, there are obvious parallels between a classic children's tale so recently brought to life on the big screen, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, as well as other stories of children finding new worlds in their imagination as a way to escape the fear, violence and pain in their real world -- Bedknobs and Broomsticks and Tales from the Neverending Story come to mind. (With the lingering questions in all, of course, about whether the worlds really were imaginary, after all.)

But it was more than that.

Then, as I was reading and thinking about the film -- and what I was going to write here -- it hit me.

Magical Realism.

It's a long literary tradition, with particularly strong ties to Latin American cultures. It's been a while, I'll admit, since I read anything that would fall squarely into that genre. In fact, the only specific work that sticks in my mind is Isabel Allende's The House of the Spirits. But this film fits into that tradition beautifully.

In Magical Realism, there is only a thin veil between the real world and the world of magic and spirits, and each has undeniable ties to and effects on the other. The characters that are able to cross the boundary need only to be open to the possibilities.

It occurs to me that an author with more cache (Oprah's book club, anyone?) but with strong Magical Realism tendencies is Toni Morrison. She's more watercooler-friendly, so her stories are a great place to start if you want to explore the fine line between reality and "fantasy".

And while the magical world is not necessarily spiritual, there are obvious parallels. It seems to me to be no coincidence that the same parts of the world that nurture mystical systems of belief like voodoo and santeria also cultivate tales like this one.

And, in a world where organized "religion" can be maligned (and not unjustifiably) with the simple assertion that across the centuries millions have died in the name of God at the hands of men gripped by evil, is it any surprise that magic and spirits feel more comfortable, more real, than liturgy and priests?

(In Pan's Labyrinth, watch for the comment by the priest at the dinner party where plans are made to squeeze the rebels into submission. A wolf in sheepskin if there ever has been one ... )

And this story in particular, which is clearly populated by mythical creatures with no ties to Christianity, centers on undeniably Christian themes: Judgment and redemption.

Young Ofelia (aka Princess Moanna) will learn soon enough, her mother informs her, that she'll have to compromise her beliefs if she wants to survive. The real world -- a fallen one (a Christian worldview that is not spelled out in the film, but is obviously illustrated by the irrational violence that reigns in fascist Spain) -- is nothing like her fairy realm.

Yet we see other characters -- and adults, at that -- making choices with very harsh consequences in an effort to turn things right again. In the words of one such character who pays with his life, what other choice do they have?

Ofelia is ultimately faced with the same choice that we all are: Will we blindly obey the urgings of the world (or our own selfish human nature), or will we strike out on faith and put it all on the line for what we believe is right?

So is this a tale of tragedy or triumph?

That depends on which is more important: the "real" world or the fairy world, our bodies or our souls.

Face Your Fears!

2007-02-09T22:13:00.000-05:00

Remaking the classic (and not so classic) horror films from the seventies is en vogue right now, but when I heard they were gonna do a "remake" of Faces of Death, I was baffled to say the least. Yeah, I know that the majority of the scenes were faked, but still... a remake of what is essentially a parade of disjointed clip is pretty redundant. Plus, I've seen things ten times worse than the original FOD films on the internet... on accident!

But then I heard that there was a screenplay out there that basically took the premise of the original films (bizarro Dr. Francis B. Gross' ongoing quest to document grisly death scenes) and structured a plot around it (possibly characters investigating a series of mysterious deaths). I have to admit, I love that idea. Very meta. Very modern. It is such a cool idea, in fact, that I quickly shrugged it off as a fan-fueled rumor that would most likely never materialize. Then, today they had a link to what might actually be a trailer for a FOD remake on Aint It Cool.

Now, I don't wanna get my hopes up too much, but the idea's pretty solid and I'm dying for some retro-horror not produced by Michael Bay. Here's hoping that this one is for real.

Check out the trailer, here.

Number TWO in the Hood, G!

2007-02-01T15:49:00.000-05:00

Yesterday after I got off work I hit the Y. Luckily I got there early enough to change the tv away from BET (which it is perpetually set to). I always listen to the ole Ipod while I'm on the treadmill, so I usually opt for one of the news channels that have enough scrolling and otherwise graphic info that listening is not imperative.

Yesterday, I stopped on MSNBC and there appeared to be some sort of "BREAKING NEWS!" going on. Of course, previous experience has taught me that what a news channel considers "BREAKING NEWS!" is seldom worthy of yanking out the earbuds. So, I just kept on going, glancing up only occasionally to check out what was going on. Really, it was only random words that registered in my head. Boston, bomb, terrorist plot... It was only later yesterday evening that I learned it was all complete overreaction to guerilla marketing for the upcoming Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie.

Yeah, it's pretty lame. You'd think that someone... anyone at the Boston police department would have had the wherewithall to say, "Hey, guys. Maybe we should at least give this thing a little look-see before we call out the bomb squad, S.W.A.T. team, k-9 units, and the remote controlled bomb-detonating robot." If they had actually looked at these things (and I'm not talking about poking around at them, either... I'm just talking about opening your eyes!), they would have most likely come to the conclusion that Christmas lights and Duracells generally aren't considered components in a WMD.

I mean, I understand that Boston is probably harboring a lot of guilt. You know... two of the three 9/11 jets took off from Logan. Plus, they've recently begun dropping massive concrete slabs on top of their own citizens, but there is such a thing as being cautious to the point of absurdity. And that is exactly what happened yesterday on national television. Check out the local coverage of it, here.

Anyway, I'm a pretty big fan of ATHF. The first two seasons, anyway, but I'm a little leery of a film version. Early word from folks who have seen it is that it pretty much sucks. I mean, they're stretching an eleven minute show out to an hour and a half. What could possibly go... right? I must admit though, the trailer almost has me excited for it. Almost. You can see it, here.

UPDATE!!!

Best... press... conference... ever!

UPDATIER!!!

Comemorative T-Shirts!

UPDATIEST!!!

Osama Teen Hunger Force!